City Desk

Just Move Back to D.C. Already, Andrew Sullivan

It's only been four months since Daily Dish blogtrepeneur Andrew Sullivan moved from his Adams Morgan apartment to New York, but it seems like it's been longer. With Sullivan gone, Adams Morgan residents haven't had anyone to creepshot as he eats at Subway. The neighborhood is bereft.

Fortunately, it seems like Sullivan's stay in the Big Apple can't possibly last much longer, because he really hates it. Today, in a blog post titled "New York Shitty, Ctd.," Sullivan laments how incompetent nearly everyone in New York is. He's mad about a few bad encounters with barbers as he attempts to tame his beard, including one barber who broke his iPad.

Still, the barbers aren't the only problem Sullivan sees in New York. Sullivan finds problems with the WiFi's connection to his speakers, the building superintendents, the pharmacists—everything. "It doesn’t really get much better, you just get used to living in one of the least competent, self-loving cities I’ve ever known," writes a defeated Sullivan.

This isn't the first time Sullivan has been down about his new city. In the original "New York Shitty," Sullivan's lengthy shit list included entries for furniture delivery services, New York-area Best Buy outlets, his apartment size, the water temperatures, his cable box, and his DVR. "Will it get better?" he moaned. "Please tell me it gets better."

Sullivan is clearly unhappy in New York, so I'll say this: Andrew, come back. We miss seeing you hanging around the Diner, or wearing ugly T-shirts. In exchange, we will meet all of your gadget- and beard-related needs, which seem extensive.

This is a good deal for New Yorkers, too, since you'll stop giving their barbers ulcers (have you considered a beard trimmer?). The end of your employment with the Daily Beast means you have one fewer reason to stay in the city, too. So, when your lease runs out later this year, how about hopping an Amtrak south?

Photo via Wikimedia Commons

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Comments

  1. #1

    Will, you must not know Andrew well. I have known him for 26 years, he does not do happy. There are those of a certain age looking at life through certain prisms to whom happy is tantamount to betrayal.

  2. #2

    Bad encounters with barbers? Yeah, it must suck to go in to the barber and just ask him to trim it up a bit, but then he goes and cuts a big chunk out of the middle of your chin, giving you a "James Hetfield"! I'd be pissed, too!

    I'm sorry, what's that? He went for that look on purpose? Well, this is embarrassing- I'll show myself out.

  3. #3

    @Ben

    Oh Ben, sorry, being attractive is also tantamount to betrayal. Andrew was once cute as a button and was coiffed and clothed somewhat normally...then, well....well, let me just say, there has been no betrayal on that front...

  4. #4

    I used to see him at the Grooming Lounge on L, which really isn't that great.

  5. #5

    I think Andrew should move back too on general principles. Here he is a celebutante, in NYC he is somewher south of Skinny Girl Vodka's hunky husband.

    Although, he should team up with Andy Cohen who seems to be having a heck of a lot of fun.

  6. #6

    I moved from DC to NY years ago and found things by and large better run and easier to do. Maybe Andrew waited too long and got too crabby.

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