Dame of Chance
Those who pack the District's bingo halls do everything possible to seduce Lady Luck. D.C. bingo queen Vanessa Woodland does everything possible to curse her.
Cover Story
Those who pack the District's bingo halls do everything possible
to seduce Lady Luck. D.C. bingo queen Vanessa Woodland does everything possible to curse her.
Photographs by Darrow Montgomery
The Wednesday-night charity bingo game at the Ukrainian Catholic National Shrine of the Holy Family generally lasts for a pleasant two hours, carried along by friendly banter and good spirits. But on this Wednesday night in July, there's some tension in the hall. Vanessa Woodland, the most dominant and loudest player in the room, hasn't hit yet. And when this bingo champion is having a bad night, it's best to stay out of her way.
One elderly gentleman, a bingo regular, forgets this rule and manages to annoy Woodland.
"Why you keep looking at my titties?" the 40-year-old Woodland asks him, loud enough for everyone in the church's first-floor social hall to ponder the question. "You know you can't touch them."
He laughs, embarrassed, and mutters something under his breath, further increasing her exasperation. "I'm gonna kick the shit out of you. You are one irritating senior citizen," says Woodland.
Most of the people in the church are now looking in Woodland's direction. Knowing she has an audience, she soon sets in on one of the ushers: Vladimir, a young man from Lviv with rock-star ambitions. "You irritating as hell. You driving me crazy," she tells him.
Vladimir responds, "You like me, don't you?" ... Continued 
Issue of Jan. 25 - 31, 2002
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