Work Is Hell Ebony Tara Scurry turns goths corporate.
Undercover Sister: Ebony Tara Scurry gives goth career woes the boot.
(Darrow Montgomery)
Recent Show & Tell
- Closing Time
Posted: September 10, 2008 - Pitter Pander
Posted: September 3, 2008 - The Martial Plan
Posted: August 27, 2008
Lady Eve was having career trouble. When the 38-year-old fetish enthusiast and self-described “dom” began working 9-to-5 in a more reserved office last year, her day job began interfering with her bedtime rituals. “I was constantly petrified that they would find out about the fetish scene,” says Eve, who says she struggled to keep her extracurricular activities “completely secret” while on the job. “My husband, he’s a sub. He just enjoys being beaten,” she explains. “I know it sounds weird, but to some people, that gets a bad rap.”
While cracking the whip at a private BDSM party last December, Eve encountered Ebony Tara Scurry, a petite 25-year-old certified career management coach with a master’s in organization development and a fondness for patent leather. Since working with Scurry’s career service, Eve has started looking for a more tolerant job environment—and, with Scurry’s help, is now considering making her fetish her job. “A lot of people have been wanting me to go pro, and Ebony’s one of them,” says Eve. “For the time being, though, I’m just going to focus on paying the bills.”
Scurry, a goth since middle school and career “architect” since 2005, has emerged as an expert in the job woes of the darker set. Earlier this month, the Silver Spring resident consolidated her interests, re-launching her general career service as Eidolon Career Solutions, named for the ancient Greek concept of the “astral double,” the phantomlike spirit of a human being. Now, Scurry caters specifically to members of the goth, hellion, fetish, and GLBPQT (gay/lesbian/bisexual/pansexual/questioning/transgender) communities. Scurry says she locates clients in need through her social circle, and by posting free advice on goth message boards. One avenue Scurry hopes to avoid in the future: “My mom likes to refer me to her friends for résumé help and things,” says Scurry. “I have to say, ‘Mom, I don’t help everyone anymore.’”
Clients Scurry does take on pony up anywhere from $160 for a 50-minute “Lightning Round” session to $1,920 for one month of “Exploring & Solidifying Your Career,” tailored for alterna-types who “don’t know what the hell is going on.”
Scurry has four active clients but hopes to bring in more business by tailoring her advice to the unique challenges of the alternative subculture, from workplace wardrobe teasing to anxiety at staying “undercover,” goth speak for “in the closet.” “A co-worker might be afraid of you because they know that you’re goth, because of your face, or because you do strange things like play role-playing games and think you’re a vampire,” says Scurry. “People can get turned off by that in the workplace.” Beyond explicitly frightening co-workers, Scurry says that goths can find it difficult to identify with mainstream employees. “We don’t necessarily enjoy the same things the average person does,” she says. “A lot of alternative people just don’t like other people.”
Scurry first began experimenting in the goth scene while a middle schooler in Potomac, when she and her friends became fascinated with a live-action role-playing game called Vampire: The Masquerade. In the game, humans masquerade as vampires masquerading as humans. “That drew me to the darkness and all that fun stuff,” says Scurry.
Beyond her after-hours goth exploits, Scurry has always held down a mainstream day job, currently a human resources position with the federal government. At first, entering the workforce forced Scurry to suppress her gothness. “I didn’t want anything to impact my success,” she says. “I would never say, ‘I’m going to the goth club this Saturday,’ or wear black nail polish or anything that would identify me with my lifestyle.” Now, Scurry has been able to integrate her goth look into the workforce, adopting a style she calls “Corporate Goth.” It “doesn’t mean that you have to wear black all the time, but there’s always something on you that says, ‘This person is not normal,’” says Scurry, who now stays darkly professional by pairing suits from Ann Taylor Loft with black nail polish and gothic chokers.
Scurry has since collected her Corporate Goth tips in a 26-page manual, Corporate Goth 101: Top Strategies for Bludgeoning to Death the 7 Most Common Workplace Problems, available for $18.95—or free with a subscription to Scurry’s newsletter. Included are tips for dealing with a variety of corporate goth dilemmas, like this one: “I’ve been passed over for two promotions and I’m thinking about leaving. Each time they said it’s because I scare the customers. I’ve received nothing but kudos from the customers—I know who’s really afraid.”
The manual also includes suggestions for 35 other goth workplace challenges, including the 19th most commonly reported problem: “Having to hide Pentacles due to stereotypes that they’re satanic symbols”; the 26th: “Perception by other goths that they’ve sold out”; and the 29th: “Long gothic skirt always getting caught in the rolling chairs at work.”
Sarah Palaszynski’s workplace problems extend beyond wardrobe malfunctions. Palaszynski, a 25-year-old Gaithersburg artist, began hanging out with Scurry a couple of years ago at Saturday night goth haunt Midnight. But when interacting with co-workers at her Plaza Artist Materials sales job became “too unpleasant to manage,” Palaszynski turned to Scurry as a career counselor. “I’m not a normal person,” explains Palaszynski. “As an artist, a lot of my subjects are deities and gods, and I feel very spiritually connected to these beings. Sometimes when I draw them, I feel their presence.” Her co-workers didn’t understand. “More often than not, they just looked at me funny,” she says.
Palaszynski also felt uncomfortable discussing her synesthesia, a neurological condition where two or more senses become crossed. “I see numbers in colors, and I see colors in numbers,” she says. “I also taste names. The name Joey tastes like chewing on uncooked spaghetti. John tastes like pizza cheese,” she explains. “It’s difficult for me to talk to people about that.”
After working with Scurry, Palaszynski found a gig at Monart Drawing School, which she says has a more accepting corporate culture. “They immediately get it, because they experience those things as well,” she says of her new co-workers.
But even with the help of Scurry’s niche problem-solving, corporate goths can still find barriers to success in the workplace. One Eidolon client, Baltimore’s Artondra Hall, says that she’s “normalized” to take her current position—meaning that she’s chosen not to “initiate” her co-workers into her goth persona, known as “Ladie Artie.” Still, Hall faces discrimination. Hall contacted Scurry to help weather criticism not for her fetish boots or indigo hair but for a different physical feature: an unplanned pregnancy. “Goths have our own share of problems, but we have the same problems as anyone else, too,” says Hall. After a period of rude treatment from her co-workers, Hall has indeed been tempted to cast a curse on the “uninitiated.”
“There are times when I wish I had a secret power,” Hall wrote on a message board. “The power to broadcast my thoughts into their heads until the buzzing of my voice made them implode.”
Got Something for Show & Tell? Send tips to show@washingtoncitypaper.com. Or call (202) 332-2100, x 455.
Aug. 22 - 28, 2008 (Vol. 28, #34)
Comments
10:22 pm
Great article. I can identify with Eve, Hall and everyone else that is a Corp Goth.
8:43 am
Wow, the thing about being interviewed is you never quite know how the end result will turn out. Amanda, I appreciate you keeping it real and portraying everything in an honest, objective light.
Readers, the $1,920 for “Exploring & Solidifying Your Career,” tailored for alterna-types who “don’t know what the hell is going on.” is actually for three months, not one.
I also provide a good bit of free stuff, so you'll want to sign up for my newsletter for the details on how to get them.
One reason why I accepted the invitation for the interview was because I hoped an article like this would increase awareness of alternative individuals in the workplace and in turn, spark dialog among everyone (alts and the people they work with) that would begin to facilitate the process of moving towards not just tolerant, but accepting workplaces. In these types of environments where employees are comfortable with being themselves, it tends to have a positive on other things such as engagement, productivity, morale, and simply waking up and looking forward to going to work.
It just makes business sense for any company or agency to expand their traditional definition of diversity and inclusiveness to include lifestyle and non-traditional minority groups such as Goths, at least in practice. It takes energy to be 'undercover', not to mention it causes anxiety for some. Energy that can better be used elsewhere, like being productive on the job. Anxiety that, if erased could mean a more pleasant employee to interact with your customers.
Unless "alternative lifestyle" becomes a demographic on your annual employee survey, it may be difficult to measure the ROI on this. :) Until then, we've all got work to do in terms of inclusive best practices that benefit everyone.
~ Ebony
ebony@eidoloncareersolutions.com
10:06 am
Wow! I just had a "hey I know that person moment"! I met Ebony out at Club Chaos last year. She's a smart, sensitive and insightful girl (cute too!), so I'm not surprised she's doing this. Anything to bring more acceptance and open-mindedness to others is a good thing. Being different shouldn't be so threatening to people! Bravo for you Ebony!
12:23 pm
Wonderful article, Amanda.
It was nice talking to you about my career history, and my synaesthsia :)
2:22 pm
When I was 15 or 16 my father asked me why I dressed the way I do. He added that there were all kinds of people who wouldn't talk to me because of it. I replied, that anyone who wouldn't talk to me because of how I look wasn't the kind of person I'd want to talk to.
Pretty much feel the same way about work. I wouldn't want to work for anyone who would judge me by what I do outside of the office.
4:52 pm
If you don't want to be judged by what you like outside of work then don't tell anybody at work about it. Why is it important for people at work to know what you like outside of work? I have always kept my work life and private life completely seperate.
Goths are not part of a minority group. Listening to a certain style of music and dressing a certain way are lifestyle choices not something that you are born with. Comparing being goth/punk/alternative to being a person of color or a person who is gay/lesbian/transgendered is a bit ridiculous. People don't choose what color/sexuality they are, but they damned well choose how they can dress.
If a person is worried that they won't be able to wear their style of clothes at work then they should deal with it, instead of being told that people have to except you. Not everybody in the world is ever going to except you, no matter how much you pay somebody to try to tell you otherwise.
5:24 pm
I meant accept...not 'except'. Carry on.
Also....when did being goth make a person part of a minority group?
7:17 pm
Ebony way to find a niche, I know I'm gonna sound crazy when I say this but.....Springbrook is proud!
7:20 pm
Thanks for your comments "Oh Come On Now". You raise a lot of valid issues and points. I've actually heard all of them before, just in different words, but it doesn't make them less valid just because they're common. I'm going to respond to each one in turn. Your comments will be in quotes.
"If you don't want to be judged by what you like outside of work then don't tell anybody at work abou it."
- As a matter of fact, most alternative people do take this route. And for some, not being able to talk about even small aspects of their personal life because they are afraid of being judged (for my clients it's about puting their jobs and promotions on the line) makes them feel even more of an outsider at their place of work. It can cause a lot stress, use of energy, and anxiety to keep quiet and be secretive. For some, this isn't an issue, and that's great - but for those who struggle with this - Eidolon is there to help.
"Why is it important for people at work to know what you like outside of work? I have always kept my work life and private life completely separate"
- The last time someone told me how effectively they kept their work/life separate I asked "And how much to you trully enjoy your job? Do you look forward to it or is it just a paycheck?" For this person it was just a paycheck. For others sometimes it is, sometimes it's not. From my personal experiences, I have found that work/life separation is an indicator of their job being just a paycheck. Eidolon is about helping those who want more than just a paycheck. Also, not everyone wants to keep things separate and would prefer not to have to use the energy to do so if given the choice. There are those who chose to make the choice of *not* having separate work/life just as you have chosen the more common path of keeping them separate. I think alts deserve not to be stressed about their career "life" finding out about the personal "life" to the possible detriment of their career.
Besides this, moving up in the workplace often includes more than a person's abiliy to do their job. It involves relationships. Getting beneficial/preferred assignments, the benefit of the doubt, training opportunities, even promotions etc. tend to happen more frequently with those the decisionmakers know, like, and trust. To get to that point there usually needs to be a relationship. Relationships usually begin with small talk. Even when we check out some of the best sellers in the Marketing section of your local bookstore - every book worth their salt will talk about getting the customer to "know, like, and trust" you. Marketing 101, really. As employees, we are our brand. We are a product that our company is "buying" (i.e. paycheck). When an employer senses that an employee is 'hidind' something, it is possible that it can have a negative impact on their willingness to "know, like, and trust" them. If you sensed someone you were buying something from was lying about something - even if it didn't exactly relate to their product, you would be hesitant if not run the other way? So if you can fake it good enough, then good. Yet alts come to Eidolon because they're tired of faking it and they want to take control of their own path, stop letting others plan their career for them because they know they can't control others, only themselves and they're ready to get results asap.
"Goths are not part of a minority group. Listening to a certain style of music and dressing a certain way are lifestyle choices not something that you are born with. Comparing being goth/punk/alternative to being a person of color or a person who is gay/lesbian/transgendered is a bit ridiculous. People don't choose what color/sexuality they are, but they damned well choose how they can dress"
- Most people who self-identify as goth/punk/alternative will tell you that being goth/punk/alternative actually has little to do with clothing. Clothing is an expression of that. In many ways, so is music. Not to get all fluffy and cliché on you, but it's about 'what's on the inside'. Something that is ingrained, similar to personality and preferences, is my opinion. Similar to even the types of food a person likes. These are things a person is born with. Yet still, because there is an inherent aspect of choice still there, it makes it even more difficult for non alts to understand (your can chose to use your right hand, even if you're left-handed but what if society says it's sinister/bad. It's just that using your right hand is much more comfortable and your preference). I actually talk about the issue of choice a bit inside of my Corporate Goth 101 manual.
"If a person is worried that they won't be able to wear their style of clothes at work then they should deal with it, instead of being told that people have to except you. Not everybody in the world is ever going to except you, no matter how much you pay somebody to try to tell you otherwise"
- Some alts are in the "just deal with it" mindset. I don't work with alts who are in that phase or mindset. By the time an alt gets to Eidolon, they are in high gear, proactive, not passive and ready to move on to "blacker pastures" where they don't have to "deal with it". Sometimes they won't know what they want to do career wise, but they know they don't want to stay where they are, or in other words continue to "deal with it" anymore. I actually like clients who are a little ticked-off because we redirect that energy to their goals and end up seeing the results they want faster. They're at the breaking point of either being fed up with "dealing with it" or they want to put 100% into giving all they've got to get where they want to be so that if they have to settle into the possible fate of having to "deal with it" at least they know they didn't settle into it without a fight. They take it into their own hands to find a place where they can be themselves without stress or hassle or in the least reduce the stress or hassle significantly.
I think all alts know exactly what you mean by "not everybody in the world is ever going to accept you". Very good point and I agree. The clients that come to Eidolon don't rely on getting others to accept them. They decide for themselves if they will accept their situation or move on. Eidolon Career Solutions is about helping alts evaluate their situation, make a decision and provide the support they need to implement it, whether it means Staying (buidling a brand, learning strategies to increase confidence in interacting with unaccepting/unprofessional co-workers, finding better opportunities to move within their current company, etc.) or Moving On (re-evaluating career goals and desires, job search techniques, resume & interview services).
Whew, that was a lot. If there's something I didn't touch on "Oh come on now", feel free to comment again or email me directly at ebony@eidoloncareersolutions.com. Again, I appreciate your comments and points. I actually like to learn about the opinions and perceptions out there about alts in the workplace. I want to reiterate that I don't think your points or comments are wrong - as a matter of fact they're quite common. And for those that hold your perception, that's great if that works for you as it seems to be. But for those who don't share that perception. For those who don't want to "deal with it", for those that want to feel comfortable talking about their personal life (even a non-alt shouldn't tell *everything* but being able to say you went to a goth club shouldn't be more different than someone else saying they went to club Dream or some other night hot spot),and for those who do feel that alt is a subculture in it's own right. Counter-culture to the norm, who do not make up the majority (i.e. a minority group) , for those - Eidolon is available to be their partner in reaching their career goals when they're ready.
~ Ebony
ebony@eidoloncareersolutions.com
8:36 pm
Wpnderful article! Ebony you are a true Renaissance Woman! If I ever get any other goth friends I will be sure to refer them to you!
6:35 am
I can't believe that you are still calling goths a minority group that somehow are affored the same rights as let's say gay and lesbians. Style of dress and choice of music are something completely different than something that you are born with. To think otherwise is, in my honest opinion, ridiculous. I was in the goth/deathrock/punk subculture for over twenty years and I never once thought that I was 'special' enough to be afforded the same rights as people who struggled to gain theres just because I listened to a different style of music or dressed in black.
I, of course, realise that being goth can be a lifestyle choice, but that doesn't make the people in question any more special than anybody else who has different tastes in music or style of dress. To say so only makes people seem self important. Why can't 'non-alts' understand 'alterna-typs'? It's because there are a certain number of people in the goth/punk/whatever subcultures who wish to remain completely seperate from the rest of society. By socially isolating yourself and saying 'nobody understand me' makes you sound like you are nothing more than an angst filled teenager. Of course nobody is going to take you seriously if you have an attitude like that.
I understand that you have to make a buck but all of this just sounds really ridiculous.
9:42 am
i get this. i think Scurry is on to something.
i'm not a Goth, and i understand the potential difficulty when lumping Goths into the same category as other "bigger" minorities (an oxymoron, i know).
but it's really just about freedom of expression - at work, in your neighborhood, etc - and why shouldn't we all be entitled to act and dress the way we all want, individually, creatively, or not? the messed up thing about the mainstream culture (and indeed, a great deal of DC) is the sameness. and that's where i suspect Scurry is doing the greatest service - helping people to overcome that pressure - Goth or otherwise.
this is funny to me - in the same way, this is why i started having my own naked group parties. i'm bisexual, and like to play in groups - but found that the typical group scene was either all one sex, or when mixed, had a hetero-focus on it. i felt like a Goth in a mainstream job. ultimately i just decided to start my own parties (http://havingparties.blogspot.com).
although i'm an activist, i didn't want to change the swinger party culture so much as i just wanted to have fun. but that is about play, and what Scurry does is about work. i wish her the best of luck.
10:02 am
For the people that seem to be having a problem with the use of the phrase "minority group":
A minority or subordinate group is a sociological group that does not constitute a politically dominant voting majority of the total population of a given society.
Using this standard sociology definition, "goths" are indeed a minority group, as are members of any other subculture or non-majority group.
12:42 pm
I’m not sure what is meant exactly by "afforded the same rights as let's say gay and lesbians". I do call Goths a minority group, and they are - I did not say that they "somehow are afforded the same rights as let's say gay and lesbians" This is a misinterpretation.
In terms of the "born with" or "not born with" as it relates to being alt, that’s not the most important point and comparison I am trying to convey. The being born alt or not really isn’t important. It’s not important because it doesn’t change anything. The individual is still who they are - born that way or not.
I feel that GLBPQT should be able to be "out" at work without negative consequences to their careers and without having to ‘hide’ who they are and their lifestyle/orientation. The comparison I’m making is that I also feel that alts should be able to not be undercover about their lifestyle in the workplace because of many of the same and similar reasons such as judgment, fear of negative consequences to their careers, stereotypes (GLBPQT often deal with the ‘evil’ stereotype of being a sin. Many alts deal with the ‘evil’ stereotype as it pertains to Satanism and devil-worship), or having to ‘hide’ who they are and their lifestyle as well.
The concept of not having to 'hide' your lifestyle is a comparison of basic desires that should be, not a comparison of rights that are protected by federal law.
Being comfortable being open about your lifestyle, regardless of if it's a choice or not and without fear of negative consequences is something everyone should have access to and I don’t think there’s anything ridiculous about that.
As for making a buck – Yes. My clients pay me money that's not often easy to come by, particularly in these economic times. They put their faith and trust in me to be their partner in helping them figure out where they want to be and then get there. Providing constructive, honest feedback, finding out what motivates each individual, knowing when to push and when not to. Knowing how to help them find the answer themselves while facilitating their exploration – all of that isn’t something learned overnight. I am certified to do what I do, my clients have positive results based on their own criteria for success and I have no qualms with admitting to being compensated for it. I don’t take what I do lightly. Being a lifetime partner in someone’s career is a relationship, and often other issues come out. Sometimes they laugh, sometimes they cry, and sometimes they get ticked-off at themselves or others (and even at me – then thank me later for reminding them what it was they said was important to them and acting upon it) These are people’s lives I’m working with, most often their sacred dreams (yes, I had a client call it “sacred” and it’s all good, I’m not making that up) and ultimate goals that connect to their happiness and/or future paychecks.
Not everyone needs, wants, or is open to career management assistance. There are career coaches for the average person, yet not every single person will use them because they may not want or need them among other reasons - Same with the alt community. Not everyone may have career difficulties or personal goals to identify and surmount. But for those that do, that’s what I do. I help others and expand my own horizons and I enjoy every second of it. I don’t think there’s anything ridiculous about that either.
Crescentia, I agree with you about the 'social isolation' concept. One of the top problems faced by Goths in the workplace is ‘not being taken seriously’.
Anonymous, thanks for the clarification about the definition. I come from a background in Sociology and that’s the perception that I’m coming from. So absolutely, "goths" are indeed a minority group, as are members of any other subculture or non-majority group.
Keep in mind that most people, alt or otherwise have to do some amount of self-censorship at work. This is normal and expected in the workplace. What we’re getting at is that alts, if they chose to self-censor, inherently have more to censor than the next person.
Everyone who has commented so far, thanks. I appreciate both the support and the challenges to some of the perceptions put forth. I want to say more, but my lunch break is over in a couple of minutes :) Please shoot me an email with your feedback or questions if you prefer not to post. Thanks to those who already have. Good day.
~ Ebony
Ebony@eidoloncareersolutions.com
2:17 pm
Yo ebony you go girl!!! I think I have to do your corprate goth 101 as an experiment out at my boarding school. I also think that your employers are asses for passing you up for your raise. GOt to get that money honey.
3:03 pm
Just wanted to day I really appreciate Ebony's well thought out and stated opinions.
Good work.
4:18 pm
Interesting and very thought provoking article. I can't say I agree that Goths are a minority, that does seem to be going a bit far. While being more sensitive or creative can't be helped, clothing and hair color are choices. I have worked in the most corporate environments looking like Morticia Addams without any problems in regards to promotion or respect. I think it's all how your carry yourself. If you go in with an attitude of "I'm so different" or apologizing for whom you are you will never be considered equal or taken seriously. Hold your head up from day one and never hide who you are. In my experience, people are standoffish at first but eventually start to *like* how different I am.
Currently, I'm lucky enough to have a job where mostly everyone is Goth and we can wear literally just about anything to work. However, while it pays the bills it's not enough to buy a house or fancy car. I love what I do and who I work with but I'm also envious (to some degree) of "sellouts" in the corporate world. There's defiantly a trade-off. You may not get to have Halloween everyday but you most likely get benefits and a bigger paycheck. But then again working in the mainstream leads to the dreaded "weekend warrior" syndrome, so it's really hard to say which path is best.
And just a PS.. I've never understood the whole Goth-persona-made-up-name-thing. It's Monty Python-esque silly, sorta.
10:58 am
Good for you Amanda. I've been a Goth in the workplace for over 25 years now, and if you can help people out - especially to help employers see that purple hair != someone who cannot work efficiently, accurately, etc. - then more power to you.
Corporate America desperately needs to be more accepting of different subcultures. It should never be about your looks if you are not in outward-facing divisions, dealing with customers. Companies should be focusing more on work output, efficacy and ethics and less on trying to make everyone look cookie-cutter.
My own personal story is similar, save that I successfully left Corporate America to go Freelance and I haven't looked back since. Had a company been more open-minded, they'd have landed a dedicated and driven employee on their staff. The truth is that you can only be forced to live a double-life for so long before you say to yourself "life is too short to spend the majority of the week miserable."
11:24 am
*Correction - that was meant to be directed at Ms. Scurry, not Amanda.
This is what I get for reading the Corp Goth digest and replying without coffee. :D
4:12 pm
Yey, go Ebony! As a Corporate Goth here's a toast to you.
BTW people, goth/gay/lesbians = minority groups. Why? Because it's not the majority group
2:23 pm
"unwanted pregnacy"
This is a U.S. protected issue under the FMLA. "Goth" has nothing to do with it.
The rest of it's stupid, and not really worth discussing, but the pregnacy issue a serious workplace problem. You should contact your HR department or local advocacy, not an unqualified "goth coach" or whatever.
2:28 pm
"I’ve been passed over for two promotions and I’m thinking about leaving. Each time they said it’s because I scare the customers. I’ve received nothing but kudos from the customers—I know who’s really afraid"
I can't believe I'm responding to this. Of course they're not going to promote you in a public-facing environment, because you're not presenting in a fashion that sells the product.
Go work at Hot Topic, and you'll probably find someone more "accepting" of the lifestyle. When you're being paid to sell for a company, your image plays a key role.
Jesus.
2:29 pm
"You should contact your HR department or local advocacy, not an unqualified "goth coach" or whatever. "
A Manager,
And what if her advice were the same as yours? Does it matter who says the good advice, or just that it gets said?
11:58 am
Thanks for your comments "A Manager" and "Anonymous".
The pregnancy issue was a serious question and there was a lot more at play than simply the pregnancy issue. She was also experiencing harassment not related to her pregnancy.
"an unqualified "goth coach" or "whatever."
"A Manager",
- I've passed the Professional in Human Resources (PHR) certification exam by (Human Resources Cetification Institute). Only 61%-67% of candidates who take this exam pass (Jan 2008)
- I hold a Human Resources Generalist certificate from the Society of Human Resource Management (received in 2004)
- I have worked as a HR Generalist in the private sector and continue to work in Human Resources in the federal government
- I have a Certificate of Completion from the Catholic University of America “For successfully demonstrating skills and knowledge required by professionals in the Human Resource field as measured by the Society of Human Resource Management" (Jan 2008)
- I have a MS from Johns Hopkins Carey business school in Organization Development & Strategic Human Resources (2007)
For more specifics about my qualifications, other certificates and certifications, please visit my website and click on "About"
And yes, I am a Certified Career Management Coach and Certified Federal Job Search trainer as well who works with Goths and other alts - so to be called a "goth coach" isn't that far off the mark, if you will. As a matter of fact, it's quite catchy. But unqualified? Quite far off the mark.
In my response to her, I spell out the Civil Rights Act of 1964 as amended in 1978 to include the Pregnancy Discrimination Act (PDA) and that her situation had more potential to be included under Harassment and not the PDA. In my response, I do suggest she request a meeting with HR and related parties.
What I challenge you, "A Manager" and anyone else who is interested, is to visit my blog http://www.eidoloncareersolutions.typepad.com. Her full question and my full response have been posted there since July 24th for all to see. You and others can judge for yourself how appropriate or inappropriate my response to her was. I encourage everyone to post your comments on my response and provide your own suggestions to her through my blog if you feel moved to do so.
Thanks,
~ Ebony
www.EidolonCareerSolutions.com
7:21 pm
This isnt related to work, but on a personal level, I feel ive had more reverse discrimination from goths than I have ever displayed toward them. They see me dressed in a suit and just assume im some corporate pro-"the man" lackey who would never understand or "get" them. Ive never had such a negative reaction to trying to make new friends as I ahve when approaching goth or punk types. I guess I just dont care that much how i dress, i dont feel it defines or limits me. But in their eyes it does because I dont dress according to their social circle.
It makes me curious how much discrimination of goths at work is real, and how much is a defeatist attitude on their, where they write off the other person just because they were a suit and tie. I was raised to not judge people how they look. But by self-associating with a social group, goths in this case, who by their very nature must define themselves by how they look, i think it breeds unintentional prejudice within them, for those who aren't goth. Because by doing that, and associating yourself with a group who defines themselves so heavily by their looks, you're accepting the very notion and concept that clothes and external appearance can in fact define who you are. I've never believed that though...
This may come as a surpise, but i consider myself somewhat of a goth. I love the music, i love the art, I love the places - clubs and cafes that have a goth edge. Yet because I dont look or dress the typical goth way,,, people just look at me funny when I attend those places, like im lost. Why? Because they, goths who dress goth, take one look at me and judge me. Sad isnt it?
8:03 pm
This is Nick again. I accidentally posted only half of what i meant to say.
I was also going to point out that discrimination of goths is necessary for their subculture to even exist. Part of the allure of being goth is being on the fringe, being on the edge, being slightly evil and dark, even if just playfully. Once it stops having those traits, the goth culture dies. Yet what baselines it as being edgy and on the fringe? Other peoples opinions that's what. Goths can only exist as long as they are considered as being on the fringe of mainstream society. If your mom, sunday school teacher and George Bush all started dressing in goth, it would become unpopular really fast because it would lost its greatest appear, being on the fringe. It would become so mainstream that its no longer the edge, its the center. If people stopped having negative reactions to goths, I honestly believe most goths would stop being goth. Part of the allure is knowing that you're bucking the system and societal norms, if people became accepting of goths, it would be nothing anymore.
Dont believe me? Just look at the cycle hip hop has taken, from edgy to mainstream. I think that if youre goth and really believe in and enjoy the lifestyle, then you should pray discrimination against you continues. Because when it stops, it means you've stopped being on the edge, and then your just another person then...
2:06 am
Wow Ebony... sounds like you do alot for us "goths." I think we've crossed paths before.
i can relate to this first hand. I've had to keep my private life and my work life separate. I am currently in Boston working on a radio certification. I am currently working as an A/V Tech for Harvard. It was not easy for me to get that job. I was even surprised that they gave me a chance.
I've experienced that discrimination first hand. I really haven't had a real full time job in years... possibly ever because I could not get used to it or even adjust. I do not disclose my lifestyle because I don't want people to undermine my skills or work ethic. I've already had people think of me less or are scared of me because of how I am or what I do.
It is hard for someone who dooes not fit the mold of a professional, espeically with the shape our economy is in now. The fact that you do this is amazing becasue it gives people who are not conventional a chance to let corporate America know that we are just as qualified as the next person. We just like different things.
I am good friends with Sarah and the fact that you helped her with her situation is amazing. I am so going to check out your book, and I'm going to consider you for consulting if I decide to return to DC for work.
10:28 am
While I can appreciate what is being attempted here, sometimes as an adult you have to suck it up and conform in the work place. Its a matter of what is more important to you, having multi colored hair or having a reasonable job. At the end of the day we all don't always get what we want, its as simple as that. Life is not fair, the world is not fair and sometimes your boss expects you to look professional in front of customers, clients, etc. I say this having been into the goth scene for 10+ years. I enjoy the work I do, but my work life and personal life are two completely different things. My coworkers don't need to know what I do in my spare time, in my bedroom, or anything else.
8:00 pm
well said, and well versed. i can see how this could be an issue for various people, however i have to agree with electroid where your job is concerned. i've worked various types of jobs and am currently a restaurant manager, and while my careers have not always been in the corporate office sense, there has always been a certain level of professionalism that i've seen to maintain.
personal life styles aside. yes my co-workers and employees know i enjoy electro and noise music, however, i don't let it delve into my professional appearance as it's my firm belief that you are there as a representative of your 'company' as opposed to a representative of yourself. it's good to be an individual to yourself, upon yourself, but unless you are... looking for attention, there is no real point in boasting your likes and dislikes to the world. funny that that's part of what being a goth is about, which is why i don't consider myself a goth, just more of an electrohead/technogeek :)
someday there will be more people that will accept you for who you are, but in all seriousness, be yourself to your self and those you love... there's no point in jeopardizing your lively hood and your morals on people that wouldn't accept you if you were their clone. keep it pro and enjoy your personal life on the side.
1:58 am
First of all, I would like to say that the answers that Ebony gave were eloquent, graceful and to the point. She has tapped a community that many people disregard and is offering a great service. Goth is not about bucking the system, and being goth to me is to be introspective and to understand all sides of a situation. Work is hell when you can't be part of a conversation, because the interests are so different. We must be able to open our eyes and be able to see beyound the apperance. If there is someone at your workplace that is different from what you're used to seeing, you should not be afraid of the person. It means that the alt person working there has the same capacity, experience, and skills to have that position/job. My advice to other goths is to not sacrifice who they are and their beliefs, but to be able to put forward the principles of gothdom for others to see and understand
10:50 am
Elektroid and P. Elektros, some people stand out regardless of whether or not they try to conform. Others may be better chameleons, or perhaps more introverted. The suck-it-up attitude is not for everyone. It does take a lot of energy. I'm not over-the-top goth, but there are countless clues if one looks. Even in a suit I stand out from the crowd. I am lucky that I have a work environment where it's no big deal. (I've been with the same company 10 years.)
I think it's important for people to find a tolerant atmosphere. And I'm overjoyed that it has finally made it's way into the mainstream media. First there was Nigel (played by Steve Valentine) on "Crossing Jordan" and his milder goth style -- his goth-ness came out only occasionally-- and more recently, and much more obviously, there's the adorable Abby (played by Pauley Perrette) on "NCIS", who fully incorporates her goth-ness into her her work persona, without letting it get in the way of her work or her rapport with her co-workers. So three cheers for NCIS!
http://www.nbc.com/Crossing_Jordan/bios/valentine.shtml
http://cbsncis.wetpaint.com/page/Abby+Sciuto?t=anon