Reagan National landed at the very bottom of this year’s Airport Food Review, the annual survey in which the Physicians Committee for Responsible Medicine scours the nation’s busiest airports, looking for the ones that serve the healthiest cuisine. The best airports for keeping your cholesterol grounded are Dallas/Fort Worth International Airport and Detroit Metropolitan Wayne County Airport, which tied for first in the PCRM’s survey. Ninety-five percent of the restaurants at both airports serve at least one “low-fat, high-fiber, cholesterol-free breakfast, lunch, or dinner option,” which is the criteria for being labeled a “healthy” eatery.

You have to admit, that’s a pretty damn low threshold—I mean, just one dish all day long—and still only 60 percent of Reagan National’s restaurants make the grade. PCRM tried to throw Reagan National, that last-place dog, a bone for not being a complete sniveling mess:

While National Airport remained in last place for a second year, the airport was also the most improved. National had the largest increase in percentage of restaurants offering healthful options—from 42 percent in 2007 to 60 percent this year.

The whole survey got me to thinking about why National doesn’t rate better, particularly when measured against the two main airports in Texas (DFW and Bush Intercontinental, which were first and third on PCRM’s list), where folks measure their success by the size of their ranches, their belt buckles, and their bellies. So I decided to check Men’s Fitness magazine’s latest survey on America’s fittest and fattest cities.

Sure enough, Dallas, Fort Worth, Chicago, and Houston all placed on the magazine’s list of the fattest cities. Fort Worth is No. 4, Dallas No. 6, Houston No. 10, and Chicago No. 20.

So what conclusion can you draw from this thin data? Well, that maybe chubby cities are trying to control their citizens’ widening waistbands by mandating healthier eats at their airports? Yes? Possibly? I mean, don’t these towns get embarrassed by these annual surveys labeling them the fattest asses in America?

Well, it sounds like a logical theory until you look at Las Vegas. Men’s Fitness calls it the fattest city in America. Its airport is also one of the poorest performers on PCRM’s list, coming in at No. 10.

So much for that theory.

Image courtesy of Flickr user Thombo2.