Shallal was pretty adamant:

"God forbid. That's not – no. I don't have any real political aspirations in that sense. I'm not looking to run for office. I think what I do is much more effective, much more in line with, certainly, my values and the way that I like to do things. I think, running for office, you have to, sort of, give up so many things that you otherwise don't have to do when you're running your own business."

Photo by AgnosticPreachersKid/Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 3.0 Unported license

One of those possible plans: "Maybe one day I'd like to be in politics," the Minibar mogul says during the interview. "I'd love to be a mayor."

Just imagine: a mayor who consorts with coconuts, not cronies.

You'll see priests and preachers huddled around nubile young boys in states of pointed arousal. You'll see former president George W. Bush standing atop his desk in the Oval Office, stripped down to a pair of rebel-flag boxer shorts and clutching a bottle of cheap beer like an erect member. (Sadly, no pretzels scattered about.)

Lots of boner jokes, in fact. My personal favorite depicts U.S. Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, weighing his manhood on the scales of justice. To the side, a red can of soda (pictured above) stands out in obvious reference to the whole pubic-hair-on-my-Coke brouhaha from Thomas's 1991 confirmation hearings.

I looked closely for the pubes, finding nothing so dark and curly to speak of. But artist Balage Balogh, who created the scandalous acrylics, assured me the tell-tale hairs are there. (See if you can spot them.)

Another striking image parodies Michelangelo's Sistine Chapel paintings, featuring God with a raging erection under his translucent robe.  I asked Balogh about his inspiration for the work. "Michelangelo's God is a sexy old man," the painter tells me. "He's surrounded by all these younger angels....I played on the same idea, but accentuating the sexuality of it and simply giving him an erection just to give it a big, big, um, tongue-in-cheek point."

Unrestrained by the usual boundaries of polite dinner conversation, I decided to probe a little farther: Was this a semi? I asked. Or is God fully aroused? "That's a full-on hard-on," the artist says. "It's a pretty big one."

I told him the overall image sort of suggests that God is a Muslim, surrounded by the supposed virgins of paradise. "You could interpret it that way," he replies.

A friend later points out, however, that the firm grip demonstrated by one of the angelic groupies rather suggests that she is certainly no rookie.

Oh, the joys of unfettered supper banter. Can someone please pass the strip loin?

Sax, 734 11th St. NW, (202) 737-0101

• Vincent Gray loves wonton soup. Loves the stuff. Had it for lunch today. His chief of staff regularly picks up a double order for him from the Meiwah Express stand at the Reagan Building food court.
• There's a great debate over which Starbucks to patronize among John A. Wilson Building denizens. There's the regular old Starbucks on 13th Street NW, then there's the "Secret" Starbucks inside the J.W. Marriott Hotel on 14th Street NW. The former is slightly cheaper, on the way from the Metro, has a better food selection, and is patronized by Dan Tangherlini. The latter is secluded, a good spot to eavesdrop on a secret political rendezvous, offers better service, and takes you past a cardboard cutout of President Obama on your way there.
• Kwame Brown and David Catania are closet McDonald's fans.
• Harry Thomas Jr. enjoys Smoothie King.
• Jim Graham, Ward 1 councilmember and WMATA board chair, likes to eat Subway on the dais. "Ironic," says one council wag, "because he never rides the Metro!"

That ends LL's Food Day. He's kinda hungry.

Tommy Wells has been Ward 6 councilmember since 2007.

Favorite Ward Haunts: "It really depends on the occasion. If my wife and I are beleaguered and had a rough week and we want comfort food, we go to La Loma. Sam Fuentes and his family take care of us....When you want to go to someplace nice, we like Trattoria Alberto [on Barracks Row, 8th Street SE]....For special occasions, we'll go to Montmartre. We love the French food and good wine....When we're [feeling casual], I'll go to the Argonaut for sweet potato fries and a Dogfish Head 90-minute IPA, and nine times out of 10, the fish tacos."

Home Cooking: "Marinated salmon on the grill, wild rice from Minnesota, usually with mushrooms and raisins in it, and asparagus." Actually, make that mushrooms and Craisins.

Fave Wine Region: Côtes du Rhône

Power Lunch Locale: "I have been mourning the loss of Les Halles. It was reasonably priced and I liked the dishes....I generally don't go to Chef Geoff's because they vehemently opposed sick leave, so I'm going to Bluepoint [Grill] for a real change. The good news there is the bad news: The food is not great, but I never have to wait for a table"—meaning it's easier to have a private conversation. Recently, though, he's spotted more colleagues on the premises seeking seclusion.

Quick Bite: "Same place every time," he says—a Japanese spot in the Ronald Reagan Building food court. "It's called 'Kabuki' something," he says, and he always gets the sushi deluxe with an orange juice. "And the weirdest thing is, it often costs different amounts." Wells recently returned from a European vacation, and apparently the sushi stand missed him. "I went back two days ago, and they added other sushi pieces. they let me know they were doing that as a gift."

Bag It: His sushi trips provided valuable intel on a pet piece of legislation. Wells, of course, is currently pushing a bill to charge five cents for paper and plastic bags. "The other odd thing is, sometimes they put it in a plastic bag, sometimes they put it in a paper bag. That indicated to me there's no economic difference between the two." Wells, of course, usually refuses the bag. But not always. If there's a long line of tourists behind him and the counterperson sticks his lunch in a bag, he'll take it. "I don't want to be too weird," he says.

Kaffeeklatsch: "I routinely meet with people in the back part of Firehook. I can have a fairly private conversation without constantly being interrupted by constituents. When it doesn't matter, I go to Port City." There was recently a coffee scandal of sorts in Ward 6, when the Murky coffeeshop on 7th Street SE was revealed not to have paid its taxes. Wells, however, had already avoided the joint, after owners painted over a intricate mural inside depicting an Eastern Market street scene. "I quit going there," he says. "I boycotted the affront to community art."

No Reservations: One place in Ward 6 Wells hasn't been: Dr. Granville Moore's on H Street NE. "I can't get a table!" he protests. "I'm the councilmember! What's that say about [owner] Joe Englert?"

Phil Mendelson has been an at-large councilmember since 1998.

Favorite Restaurant: American City Diner. LL pointed out this is a political pick; ACD owner Jeffrey Gildenhorn is active in local politics. Replied Mendo, "It's a diner! You don't have an appreciation for diners!"

Power Lunch Locale: M&S Grill, at 13th and F. He gets the blue plate special. For power breakfasts, though, it's Old Ebbitt.

Legislative Agenda: Mendelson is a noted legislator on gustatory issues. He passed legislation to get rid of a $100 fee to have candles in restaurants. And he, for the third time, is about to introduce a bill to require mandatory nutritional labeling on restaurant menus. "You can go to Starbucks and have a day's worth of calories in one drink but you wouldn't know it here."

Romantic Dinner Spot: "The Loose Lips will have to sleuth it out."

Neighborhood Joint: "I don't have time to be hanging out in neighborhood joints!" He went on to namecheck Colonel Brooks' Tavern, Tune Inn, and Georgena's.

Home Cookery: "I make a pretty good catfish. I'm not going to tell the secret ingredients....broil it with some parmesan cheese, nuts, and other secret ingredients."

Family Heirloom: Corn pudding. Again, he's protective: "It's got secret ingredients."

Coffee Preference: Mendelson's an inveterate home-brewer. He brings a silver Thermos of Quartermaine's, half French roast, half decaf house.

Dais Munching: "You will never see me with a Subway sandwich or an Au Bon Pain sandwich, really. Something like a snack—nuts, recently I've been big on granola bars."

Breakfast Politics: "When I worked for Jim Nathanson, he'd tell me about the difference between Dave Clarke and John Wilson['s council breakfasts]...Dave Clarke would serve, really, burnt donuts, and John Wilson had this spread with a cotton tablecloth and a silver platter. Made everyone so fat and happy that the council followed their chairman."

Favorite Breakfast Item: "Everything!" chimes in top aide Jason Shedlock. Says Mendo, "I'm afraid Jason's got that right."

When celebrities visit the city's oldest restaurant, for instance, the staff is not required by management to act all cool. Servers, bussers, bartenders, whoever can ask for autographs or pictures, says General Manager Kyle Gaffney, if the situation seems right.

It's part of Old Ebbitt's policy to have as few policies as possible. Some of the policies aren't even so rigid. If for example, an employee wants to flaunt the semi-formal pin policy — which requires no personal pins on those signature Old Ebbitt suspenders — well, no one's going to lose their job over it. Which is good for the bartender from Texas, who sports a Bevo pin on his braces.

But there's one policy that's absolutely inflexible, says Gaffney. No partisan politics at Old Ebbitt.

The White House might try to claim Old Ebbitt as its own, but the restaurant will never reciprocate. Even though some places enjoy their rep as a Dem or GOP hangout, the Grill, Gaffney says, just can't afford to alienate 50 percent of the potential diners out there.

Carrie S. Kohns is chief of staff to Mayor Adrian M. Fenty. She has been described to LL as a "definite foodie."

So Hot Right Now: "Sei, on 7th Street. Love the fish-and-chips roll."

Old Standby: "You can't go wrong with BLT [Steak]. That's an old standby. Delicious every time, great service—best steak in town, for sure." She gets the filet—"baseball cut, medium rare." Wedge salad to start. Oh, and the popovers! "That's what keeps you coming back."

Source of Foodie Intel: Kohns isn't a Zagat or Don Rockwell devotee—she's all about word of mouth. "I have lots of friends who are trying new places."

Power Lunch Locale: "The bullpen," referring to the John A. Wilson Building's mayoral office space. "We usually grab a salad from Devon & Blakely (1331 F St. NW). It's a make-your-own place....I don't have a policy of having someone bring my lunch...but if a person is going to Devon & Blakely, I usually write a list on a little Post-It."

Coffee Order: Regular drip, with half-and-half and a little Splenda. Sometimes homebrewed, sometimes not.

Neighborhood Fave: Posto, on 14th Street NW. She and husband Daniel Kohns live nearby. "We're there all the time."

What the Boss Eats: "He's sort of a creature of habit." For breakfast, it's always oatmeal with raisins and brown sugar. "Big tea drinker....Herbal tea, not caffeinated." "When he's here and having lunch, it's usually a salad at his desk. I've seen him do Corner Bakery or M&S." And no potato chips. Ever.

Weekend Cookery: "Stuffed chicken breasts....I do like spinach, bacon, and chicken. You can either pound and roll [the chicken] or make a little pocket." And Kohns says she makes a mean pot of collard greens—with smoked turkey sausage. (Communications Director Mafara Hobson holds that smoked ham hocks are a prerequisite.)

Family Heirloom Recipe: The peach stuffing made by mom Carol Fennelly. That's right: "Like stuffing for like Thanksgiving, but with peaches in it."

Marion Barry is Ward 8 councilmember and a former four-term mayor of the District of Columbia.

Favorite Restaurant: "Don't have one." Barry then goes on to name dozens of restaurants, past and present, that he has patronized. "Player's [Lounge, now Georgena's]—that's at the top of that list." There he favors the fish, collard greens, and candied yams. Also rating mentions: Mama Cole's, in Ward 8; Maggiano's; La Tomate; McCormick & Schmick's; Tony & Joe's Seafood; the Four Seasons; and Capitol Grille.

Power Lunch Location: "Old Ebbitt Grill....A good trout parmesan. A good corn chowder soup. They've got good clam chowder there, too.

Ben's Chili Bowl Order: "I used to go for the beef half-smoke, but I stopped that a long time ago. I think they have veggie dogs, turkey dogs."

Guilty Pleasure: Chitlins. "I was in Jamaica, they had these fat pigs in the sewer. I said, Goddamn! Almost never had another chitlin in my life." About a year later, though, he relented. These days, he indulges about twice a year.

Favored Establishment of Yore: Duke Ziebert's, at Connecticut and L. "First, I remember Duke, who was a colorful guy. Always got a story to tell. It was a political hangout place, all the Redskins players, too....Duke was done wrong. The Lerners tripled his rent."

Dietary Advice: "I eat very little beef...Beef is the worst thing for your body. It wreaks havoc on your stomach. It takes three times as much hydrochloric acid to digest it," says Barry, a chemist by training. "All these people say beef is the best thing since sliced bread. That's bullshit." And one other thing: "No liver. I like liver, but it's a repository of all the waste in the body. I figure that stuff is still in there."

Today's Lunch: "Something I didn't like—chicken salad on wheat bread."

Cooking at Home: "At home I eat turkey sausage, grits, and eggs, and I drink two bottles of water." His specialty, though, is salmon. "The thing for me is do the right seasoning. Occasionally I will use cajun seasoning. Let it marinate overnight—garlic powder, sometime Worcestershire sauce. There's other secrets I got I don't tell nobody....Wrap it in aluminum foil. The juices circulate, keep it moist. Ten or 12 minutes at 350 to 400 degrees...The key is not to overcook it or undercook it, unless you're eating salmon tartare."

Tipping Policy: "I tip based on service—no service, no tip....20 percent for excellent service. It goes downhill after that." He recalls the last time he ventured to the old Lion d'Or on Connecticut Avenue. "I used to go there all the time. One time I went and the bill musta been a hundred-some dollars, I tipped maybe $5...Two days later, my credit card slip showed up in the Washington Post. I went off!...I went to the owner....I explained that I tip based on service." The owner, he says, offered to comp him several meals. "I said that, 'No, I don't want that. I'm pissed.' The article in the Post said, 'Marion Barry: Cheapskate.'...I'm telling you, I'm not ever coming back here again. And I'm going to tell all my people never to come back here again." Barry pauses. "Four or five months later, he closed. I'm not saying I had anything to do with it, but word gets around."

Food isn't like music or movies. The hospitality business doesn't obsess over every restaurant or bistro or pub that opens during any particular year; it doesn't base its overall health on the success or failure of the newbies coming into the market. Restaurants, young and old, must complete against each other. In some ways, the older restaurants have it easier: They may already have a loyal clientele that doesn't require expensive marketing to lure them back to the place.

I say all this as prologue. You don't see as many Year in Food lists as you do lists for movies and music. And when you do see them, they tend to be trend oriented, like the one Chow posted earlier this month. Now come two more:

• Howard Mortman at D.C. Examiner has put together his "top ten food-related presidential campaign stories from 2008."
• Robyn Mincher at Express Night Out has collected a few "Snapshots in D.C. Food."

Photo by Flickr user mediajorgenyc.