It's official. As predicted by the National Enquirer of food journalism, next season's Top Chef will be a reunion show of contestants not good enough to win previous seasons, including three locally based cooks. Bravo producers are bravely calling this alumni gathering an "All Star" season.

The cable channel announced the full list of returning toques yesterday on its website, and it includes Carla Hall, Mike Isabella, and Spike Mendelsohn. The new season will launch on Dec. 1, but you get the feeling that Bravo can't move this baby through production fast enough.

Given the general dismissive attitude toward Season 7 of Top Chef — you know, the D.C. season in which producers actually forced the best chef to compete while sick in bed — I get the feeling Bravo is desperately trying to steer its flagship show back on course. Or at least back to ratings respectability.

But, really, an all-star/greatest hits package? Isn't that what dinosaur rock bands release when they've completely run out of ideas? I'm sure the next season will be a ratings monster, but isn't the bigger picture here something more ominous: that the format of Top Chef has become so moribund that the producers feel the need to inject a dose of its own colorful past to bring it back to life?

Discuss.

Did Amanda deserve the heave-ho instead of Alex?

As is our habit when we watch Top Chef, Carrie and I placed informal bets on who'd get the boot during last night's "Covert Affairs" episode. I figured the judges would finally send Alex packing, given his controversial history this season and the fact that he looks like a space alien love child (never good for TV). Besides, Unca Tom told Alex that he's eaten better food at street fairs after sampling the chef's veal Parmesan "disguised" as tortellini. Not Top Chef material there.

Carrie, however, had the more cogent argument: She said Amanda deserved the heave-ho because she failed on two counts. Her French onion soup was not only nasty (I believe one judge compared it to dishwater) but it was not even cleverly disguised, as the challenged called for. Hell, it wasn't disguised at all. Amanda concealed the identity of her soup by transforming it into...a soup.

Carol Blymire over at the Washingtonian agreed with Carrie on this point: Amanda should have been shown the door.

So when Padma wet her precious lips and told Alex to pack his knives and go, I figured it was yet another example of Top Chef producers futzing with the results. They couldn't bare the idea of losing semi-eye-candy like Amanda or Angelo. Alex was the easy sacrifice: He was unpopular and a lousy cook to boot.

Which then reminded me of a passage in Anthony Bourdain's new book, Medium Raw, in which he claims the judging results are on the up-and-up. Consider this passage:

What I can assure you — without hesitation or qualification — is that the judging I've been witness to or part of, in five appearances as a judge, has always been straight. Meaning, no matter how much the producers of the show may want the contestant with the heartbreakingly tragic personal story (and amazing chesticles) to survive until next week, the worst cook that particular week goes home. On Top Chef — as long as Tom Colicchio is head judge — the best food that week gets you the win. The worst gets you the loss. It's the "what have you done for me lately" criterion at the judges' table. Due to the fact that guest judges can't and haven't been witness to a contestant's previous efforts, past works do NOT factor into the final judgment. I feel sorry for the producers sometimes, imagining their silent screams as Tom reluctantly decides that the all-around better contestant, with the movie-star looks and the huge popularity with viewers, just fucked up too bad to make it to next week and has to go home.

I don't know, Tony. I have a sneaking suspicion that the producers won the battle last night.

Damn, the things you miss when you're out videotaping large, chain-let restaurants that aren't quite as large as they think. On Friday, Bravo announced the 12 contestants for the debut season of Top Chef: Just Desserts, and among them are D.C.'s Heather Chittum, pastry chef for Pure Hospitality's two Georgetown properties, Hook and Tackle Box.

Chittum got married last month, presumably after taping Just Desserts, and is now, according to her Facebook page, going by the name Heather Roth. I don't know if she'll continue to go by Heather Chittum professionally, but I do know this: By whatever name, she's a terrific pastry chef.

Chittum has not only created one of the most memorable desserts in recent history and won herself the top pastry honor in town in 2008, but she's done something perhaps even more challenging: She's managed to successfully navigate the treacherous waters at Pure Hospitality, where chefs on the savory side get tossed overboard with alarming regularity.

Her survival skills will be important on Top Chef: Just Desserts, which will be hosted by Gail Simmons and will premiere at 11 p.m. on Wednesday, Sept. 15, presumably to get some spillover viewers from the Top Chef episode before it. The way the teaser video above plays out, the producers of Just Desserts want you to understand that pastry chefs can be just as mean and backstabbing as their cousins on the savory side of the kitchen.

Watch the video and check out the nasty comment directed apparently to Chittum: "You can almost taste the resentment in her cookie." (Or maybe the judge says, "cooking," I can quite tell.) A fellow contestant then piles on in classic Top Chef fashion: "Heather, you weren't forced into anything."

The look on Chittum's face is priceless.

I suspect we're supposed to draw the conclusion that Chittum isn't long for the contest. Personally, I wouldn't make that assumption. Not by a long shot.

Was Tamesha played by Angelo?

I'm sorry, but I had to take a break from Top Chef D.C. for awhile. I can only take so much "reality" TV beofre my head feels like it's shrinking to the size of a jelly bean, ready to be eaten by the first self-starving former runway model hosting one of these stupid programs.

But others have plenty to say and report on the subject of Top Chef D.C. Let's check the current record.

• If you haven't read it yet, Time magazine is starting to think the program is played out. Sample line: "The setting this season, Washington, D.C., has all the excitement of a school field trip."

• The Los Angeles Times thought the most recent episode finally captured the essence of D.C., thanks to its partisan backstabbing.
• Slashfood says "we felt the first true hurt of the season so far" when Tamesha was given the boot.
• Ugh. WaPo reports that next week's judges will include U.S. Sen. Mark Warner, whose qualifications include part ownership in The Majestic. His fellow judges will include "television commentators Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski, Center for American Progress president John Podesta." Mmmm, political wonks judging food. Hold. Me. Back.
• The Stir thinks Angelo, the "slimeball," had a hand in Tamesha's downfall.
• Eater wishes chefs' heads would start to explode like in Scanners. Hard to explain. Read it yourself.
• The Washingtonian's guest blogger Carol Blymire was "waiting for Reagan to rise from the dead and make them cook jellybeans sous vide"
  when the Cold War elimination challenge started.
• CNN's Marquee blog is ready to choke Kelly: "The Quickfire win went to Kelly, who seems to be the breakout star of the “Top Chef” ladies this season. Albeit annoying, Kelly seems to be the only female chef this season with the confidence and skill to pull off a good dish. Though, did I mention she is annoying? Come on Andrea, step it up."

Photo courtesy of Bravo

Last week, reader and blogger Jenna challenged me over my lack of enthusiasm about Top Chef filming its next season in D.C.  It was a gentle gibe, and she immediately followed with another, gentler question to prove it: She wanted to know what local spots I'd like to see featured on Bravo's reality show.

Here was my response to both lines of her inquiry:

I don’t know. I guess I’m pleased. I’m more fascinated by the prospect of how Bravo will portray DC. I have to admit that because of the national nature of Bravo’s audience, the program will likely focus on D.C.’s obvious strengths and not on it scrappier, more interesting elements. I suspect any number of people will be pulled to serve as judges and/or their restaurants will serve as locations: Jose Andres, Michel Richard, and the Ali family. All of which is fine. But if you really wanted to do something D.C. oriented, why not have cooks try to make their own banh mi, as a nod to one of the country’s largest Vietnamese communities? THAT would be a challenge I’d watch, not just another fine-dining meal meant to impress Richard or Andres. Or why not have them cook a meal designed to be paired with beer, as a nod to one of the most impressive temples to suds in the country, Birch & Barley/ChurchKey?

Jenna's question is good enough to put to everyone: Where do you hope the Top Chef crews go in the District? E-mail me, and I'll post the best responses on the blog.

When I asked this question yesterday in the Young & Hungry newsletter (sign up at right!), I immediately got a number of responses. Some of them were self-serving or self-deprecating. Or both, like restaurateur Jackie Greenbaum's e-mail, which offered this suggestion on where to send Top Chef crews:

well, duh...the quarry house, of course.

now THAT would be TV worth watchin

She, of course, is referring to the postage stamp-size kitchen at the historic, post-Prohibition pub in Silver Spring. I'd actually pay to see that episode!

Photo courtesy of Top Chef and Bravo

Yep, I think I get it. Reality TV has supplanted reality for our affections. Leave it to New York magazine's Grub Street to cut D.C. down to size.

The Top Chef-to-D.C. rumors have been bubbling for some time, but Amanda McClements broke the news yesterday on her blog, Metrocurean. The Post followed hours later.

In more mundane news:

• An expanded Spider Kelly's reopens (Going Out Gurus)
• P.J. Clarke's has signed a deal to take over the Olives space (WBJ's Top Shelf)
• Dangerously Delicious Pies' opening party has been delayed. (Frozen Tropics)
• MoCo schools don't want any pest-infested gardens on their grounds. (All We Can Eat)
• Embassy chef cook-off! (Zagat Buzz)
• Funxion to serve booze and health food (Urban Daddy)

Who knows. In the meantime, Bryan Voltaggio explained the details of the brothers' online video series, which launches this month on their Web site:

Michael and I shot a bunch of great videos with our friends at EQAL. The videos will focus on our favorite ingredients, techniques, and gadgets. Top Chef was a fantastic opportunity to get ourselves recognized as chefs, but it is not a perfect venue to show off what we love about cooking. Being forced to cook something in 20 minutes with bizarre ingredients is fun, but not what we normally do in our restaurants. These videos will give you a better sense about our culinary point of view and passion for cooking.

We will be posting videos around once a week starting the first week of January. Please make sure to let us know what you would like to see in the videos.

It would be great if you could post photos, videos, or stories of your Christmas dinner. Upload them to your profile page and flag them as cool. We'll try to post some on the site next week.



God knows I respect the Voltaggio brothers' talent, not to mention the willingness of at least one of the siblings to extract himself from a safe, high-profile kitchen position to try something riskier,  like opening his own restaurant.

Which is part of the reason why I could never figure out why Bryan and Michael Voltaggio were on season six of Top Chef to begin with. Neither needed the career boost, and neither really seemed the type to go work for a celebrity chef.

I mean, both of them have already done their tours of duty with celebrity chefs: Bryan worked for years with Charlie Palmer in New York, Las Vegas, and D.C. Michael earned four stars from the Los Angeles Times as chef at The Bazaar by Jose Andres. Bryan has since opened his own place, VOLT, in Frederick, while Michael has gone to the Dining Room at the Langham in Pasadena, Calif., which has earned a Michelin star.

I was thinking about these facts as the brothers stood before the judges' table during this year's finale of Top Chef. The Voltaggios were the last two chefs standing, a pair of prodigiously talented brothers who played up their sibling rivalry all season — hell, before the season even. For the final episode, Top Chef producers went one step further: They flew in the mothers of the final three contestants, mostly, I figured, so that we could watch the drama of Mom Voltaggio trying to console one son while congratulating the other.

At some point in this melodrama about which Voltaggio brother would top the other, I had a vague sense of un-ease, which finally coalesced into this thought today: This conclusion feels like the work of a screenwriter as much as the product of a TV reality series. I couldn't escape the feeling that the whole season had been scripted to reach this very concluding moment between two siblings who have been snipping at each other since childhood.

I'm sure I'm wrong about that. But I'm also sure about one thing: Top Chef has pretty much lost all its charm.

Bryan Voltaggio is so gonna bury bro Michael

The first thing I wanted to know from Bryan Voltaggio is why. Why did the former executive chef at Charlie Palmer Steak and the current chef/owner of his own restaurant, VOLT, in Frederick feel the need to appear on Season 6 of Top Chef? He, of all people, doesn't seem to need the career bump that comes from allowing Bravo to manipulate the crap out of a chef's public image. I mean, he's not Carla Hall.

It seems Voltaggio has his motivations, and it concerns a certain younger brother, Michael Voltaggio, the chef de cuisine at the Bazaar by José Andrés.

"There's always been a bit of sibling rivalry between us," Bryan Voltaggio tells Y&H. "We wanted to prove who's the best."

This fraternal competition has been a part of the brothers' lives since growing up together in Frederick — whether in school, sports, or, now, cooking. Bryan Voltaggio calls it a "friendly thing" between two close family members, but he also admits that the rivalry has its benefits.

"It makes us push harder with our careers because it sets the bar high," says the 33-year-old Voltaggio, two-plus years older than Michael. "We have someone to one up."

That's when the thought strikes me: Oh, I get it. The producers of Top Chef picked these guys just to play up their lifelong sibling rivalry. So I asked Bryan Voltaggio if he thought that's why the producers selected them.

That's when a publicist for Top Chef comes on the line to say, in no uncertain terms, that Voltaggio can't speak for the producers. Nor could he say whether he bested his brother in the competition, which debuts on Aug. 26 on Bravo.

Voltaggio, of course, could comment on something based far more on day-to-day reality than any manipulated controversy on a reality TV program: His brother's four-star review from the Los Angeles Times. A four-star review, I should note, that Michael Voltaggio earned right out of the box. VOLT, by contrast, stands at two and a half stars from the Washington Post.

Does Voltaggio have any feelings about his brother's perfect score?

"It was a very proud moment...He did a fantastic job," Voltaggio says genuinely. "It's obviously something I'd like to achieve....He's obviously raised the bar."

Mike Isabella from Zaytinya: Top Chef material

When Mike Isabella got the call to appear on Season 6 of Top Chef, the Zaytinya chef apparently didn't want to do it. It took a little urging from THINKfoodGROUP's big daddy, José Andrés, before the chef decided to pack his knives and go onto the show. So says Andrés, who has a little experience with food TV himself.

"I said, 'You have to do it,'" Andrés told Y&H this afternoon. "I said, 'I want you to do it.'"

And so Isabella is one of 17 contestants who will appear on Season 6, which debuts on Wednesday, Aug. 26, in Las Vegas. Isabella is not the only D.C. area toque to compete this season. VOLT chef/owner Bryan Voltaggio is also a contestant, as is Voltaggio's brother, Michael, who's chef de cuisine at the Bazaar by José Andrés in Los Angeles. Whew, it's getting rather incestuous in here.

The good news for Andrés is that Season 6 is already in the can; filming, he says, took place last month. Isabella, who just earned a nod on Young & Hungry's 2009 Dining Guide, took some vacation time to compete on the program.  Andrés had more than enough chef power to cover for Isabella during his nearly three-week absence.

"My restaurants are good at not making any one person important, in that losing any one person brings the system down," Andrés tells me. "I have a big bench of amazing chefs supporting the playing team." By that, Andrés means chefs such as THINKfoodGROUP's Ruben Garcia and Katsuya Fukushima were available to oversee the Zaytinya kitchen, while the sous chefs ran it in Isabella's absence.

The big question, though, is this: Will Top Chef fame go to Isabella's head, like it does to many former contestants,  so that he wants to open his own restaurant? In other words, will Andrés lose his toque?

"I doubt I'm going to lose him," Andrés says. "I want to believe that he wants to stay, because Zaytinya is a good place for him."

So is Isabella back in the kitchen already?

"Yes," Andrés says, "he's back in the kitchen."

By the way, Andrés tells Y&H that he was approached about competing on Bravo's latest, Top Chef Masters. But that he turned them down. He says he's more interested in using TV to promote Spanish cooking than to merely entertain.

Photo courtesy of Zaytinya