Wondering how butt enemas and female ejaculation came to be the subject of the first obscenity case to hit D.C. in decades? Credit Los Angeles Police Department Det. Michael Ozaki, who testified yesterday as a witness for the government—and may be responsible for bringing the works of John "Buttman" Stagliano to the attention of the FBI.

Ozaki works with the LAPD on obscenity-related matters, helping to regulate everything from child pornography to topless bars to video arcades. Ozaki has been following Stagliano's work since July 22, 2007, when he first spied Stagliano's Evil Angel booth at the Erotica LA trade show. Ozaki testified that LAPD was on-site at the adult convention to ensure that the venue—the L.A. Convention Center—was in compliance. While on duty, Ozaki also observed Stagliano standing behind the Evil Angel booth, "speaking to a male" to whom he later "sold a DVD."

Ozaki next spied Stagliano on a police field trip to the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas, which Ozaki says he attends yearly to keep tabs on the "new line of products" hitting the industry. On Jan. 11, 2008, Ozaki saw Stagliano engaging in similar activity—selling DVDs, magazines, even T-shirts—from behind a convention booth.

Later that month, Ozaki paid a visit to the Evil Angel offices in Van Nuys, California, where he snapped some aerial photos of the facility and secured photographic evidence of Stagliano's wife, Karen, entering the building. Also visible in that photograph? A sign reading "Beware of the evil pussy." DVD sales? Pussy jokes? The evidence may seem tame, but the government is attempting to prove not only that Stagliano disseminated obscene matter to D.C., but also that he's is in the regular business of "pandering" obscene materials "for commercial purposes."

After Ozaki brought Buttman to the attention of the feds, the feds set to work bringing Buttman to D.C. As it turns out, before 14 jurors were forced to view Milk Nymphos and Storm Squirters 2: Target Practice in court this week, there is no evidence that either film has ever been screened inside the District of Columbia by anyone else—not even by the FBI.

Though FBI Special Agent Dan Bradley arranged to have the DVDs sent to a District P.O. Box in 2007, Bradley actually watched the movies in a cubicle in his office in Manassas, Va. Since Bradley is not a resident of D.C., didn't order the DVDs from D.C., and didn't watch them in D.C., defense attorney Paul Cambria questioned what, exactly, this case has to do with the District at all. "Did you conduct any surveys to determine the level of acceptance of adult materials?" he asked Bradley. "Have you visited any adult bookstores in D.C.?" he asked. "Have either of those two movies been declared obscene by any jury or any court?" he asked. Government prosecutors objected to Cambria's line of questioning—and the mystery of why milk enemas and vaginal discharge became D.C. issue remains unanswered.

Photo via big-ashb, Creative Commons Attribution License 2.0

* Porn performer Aurora Snow is also filing updates from the Stagliano obscenity trial. Her take: The prosecution hates fun:

Opening arguments began yesterday, and as a performer I was stunned by the prosecution’s description of what made the material obscene. From my point of view, the prosecution’s lack of contact and knowledge of what we do in adult entertainment seemed laughable. Oh no, there are close-up shots of pussy? Oh, the horror! If this were not such a serious matter, it would be a pure farce of cardboard bad guys picking on others for having more fun than them in life.

* Feminist running tally: Score one for Playboy, Chloe Angyal says.

* Remember that "conscience rule" the Bush administration squeezed through in its lame-duck period, allowing workers in federally-funded facilities to refuse to provide services they found morally objectionable? Yeah, Megan Carpentier noticed that Obama never repealed that.

* Silvana at Tiger Beatdown on the fun and frivolity of fashion! Unless you're fat:

For fat women, clothes are supposed to be about making people forget that you’re fat. “Hiding” “flaws.” “Smoothing out” your “shape” (i.e. your fat). “Emphasizing” your “assets” (at least you have big boobs, fatty). “Defining” your waist (because, hey, at least you can make one part of you look smaller than the other parts). It’s all code for: Don’t look fat. The advice isn’t too different for thin or average women. You also want—surprise, surprise!—to not look fat. And for a long, long time, I bought into that. I bought the idea that my body wasn’t acceptable and I had to use clothing as best I could to try to make it acceptable.

* The D.C. Attorney General's Office has dropped all charges against Lt. Dan Choi in relation to his "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" protests outside the White House last Spring.

Photo via walid.hassenein, Creative Commons Attribution License 2.0

First up: "A Milli," a track off Tha Carter III:

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Relevant Lyrics: "The Bible told us every girl was sour / Don't play in her garden and don't smell her flower / Call me Mr. Carter or Mr. Lawnmower"

Feminist: Weezy's lawnmower is here to destroy all those antiquated ideas about female sexuality.

Misogynist: A man's lawnmower chopping up a woman's flower is not exactly the most sex-positive imagery.

—

"Mrs. Officer," a song about a sexy cop.

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Relevant Lyrics: "Doin a buck in the latest drop/ I got stopped by a lady cop/ She got me thinking I can date a cop/ Cause her uniform pants are so tight . . . And I know she the law, and she know I'm the boss / And she know I can hide above the law / And she know I'm raw, she know it from the street / And all she want me to do is fuck the police."

Feminist: He's attracted to women in positions of power!

Misogynist: . . . as long as their pants are tight, and he can neutralize their authority by pulling out his wang.

—

"We Like Her," a song about wanting to fuck every girl in the world. Every single one!

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Relevant Lyrics: "Open up her legs then filet mignon that pussy / I'm a get in and on that pussy / If she let me in I'm a own that pussy / Go'n throw it back and bust it open like you 'posed to / Girl I got that dope dick / Now come here let me dope you / You gon' be a dope fiend / Your friends should call you dopey"

Feminist: Every woman is beautiful.

Misogynist: Just beautiful enough for Wayne to declare ownership of her genitals and describe their courtship in sexual assault terms.

—

"Lollipop," a song about oral sex.

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Relevant Lyrics: "I get her on top / She drop it like it's hot / And when I'm at the bottom / She Hilary Rodham."

Feminist: He just name-checked Hilary Rodham. In a positive way! And without the Clinton, even!

Misogynist: I'm not sure that riding Weezy is exactly the type of women's liberation Hil is working for.

—

"Prostitute Flange," a song about not caring if your lady previously turned tricks.

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Relevant Lyrics: I wouldn't care if you were prostitutin' / That you hit every man that you ever knew / See it wouldn't make a difference / If that was way before me and you girl.

Feminist: An anti-slut-shaming anthem: Her sexual history is not an issue, even if she had sex with every man she has ever met. That's pretty progressive!

Misogynist: Well, the history is unimportant as long as it's ancient—"way before me and you"—and as long as she's now only his forever: "Three letters: I do."

—

"Project Bitch," a track from Lil Wayne's Hot Boys days.

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Relevant Lyrics: Wayne's contribution to this track is devoted to the ladies who " be puttin' they mouth on it / and they suck everything out of it / and they catch it and swallow it. . . . When I come through in a Rolls Royce / I leave them with no choice / but to hop up in it an just let me make they throat moist."

Feminist: Hmm.

Misogynist: Yeah.