Want to be able to breast-feed in public, but not down with the boob flashing? Hundreds of inventors have patented devices to help limit public displays of mommy’s food-source.  Many: weird.

Bizarre Breastfeeding Contraption: The Breastfeeding Curtain

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Nothing to see here: Laseinde wants newborns to suck and cover.

Ella Laseinde is accustomed to seeing strangers’ breasts. “I’m a mammographer, so I’m with the breasts constantly,” says Laseinde, 71, who spent 30 years in government service—including five at the National Institutes of Health screening women’s chests. That’s not to say she’s interested in catching sight of stray bosoms outside the office. “I think in today’s time, they need to cover,” Laseinde says of nursing mothers. “There are so many people walking around who can catch a look.”

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