Holy shit, former D.C. Madam defense lawyer Montgomery Blair Sibley wrote a 600-page self-published book about Deborah Jeane Palfrey’s “judicial lynching.” She ended up hanging herself, remember. Resonance!

The book is titled “Why Just Her.” If this two-minute “book trailer” is any indication, it’s going to be amazing.

Oh man. See what he did there with the pull away from Preston Burton revealing Monica Lewinsky? This guy is good.

Do you look just like Bill Clinton? Sucks for you, until now, real publication the Washington Business Journal reports! Daniel Vovak is producing a comedy about Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky’s . . . thing, entitled “The Blue Dress.” Mysterious!

Lewinsky’s already been cast (Ashley-Rebekah Faulkner is the lucky lady), as has Paula Jones (she’s—WTF—playing herself). In addition to Bill, Vovak is also searching for an “Al Gore, Marcia Lewis, Ken Starr, the chief of staff, and Secret Service agents” (Whither Linda Tripp?). If you don’t think you have what it takes to step into Bill’s coterie, don’t worry—the audition alone will be creepy enough to satiate your desire for 90’s-era Washington sex stardom:

A room is reserved at the Ritz-Carlton in Pentagon City for the audition, where Monica Lewinsky was interrogated by the FBI in 1998. The tentative date is the weekend before inauguration.

So, who are your picks for local Bills?

Because he can’t not be involved in every seminal public shaming in American history, Kenneth Starr has signed on to defend Prop 8 in California Supreme Court. On Friday, the former airer of Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky’s dirty laundry was named lead counsel for the official pro-Prop 8 team. Starr & co. won’t stop at upholding the ban: The Yes on 8 campaign has filed a brief moving to nullify the nearly 20,000 same-sex marriages made official before the law’s passage. No word as to whether Starr will wear his trademark shit-eating grin (right) when the case goes to trial.

Photo via the U.S. Federal Government.

Slate’s Melinda Henneberger tells us why political marriages are so bad. It gets a lot worse than Monica Lewinsky.