Last year, a feminine hygiene company found that 50 percent of British women surveyed prefer having sex while drunk. And 6 percent of respondents have exclusively had sex while drunk. The armchair psychoanalysis employed to interpret these results didn't determine whether women actually enjoy drunk sex better than sober sex, or whether getting drunk simply helped to facilitate the sex even happening. Do women get drunk to have better sex or to feel better about having sex? Enter Pop singer Kiely Williams, who is leading the charge in heralding the erotic benefits of blackout intercourse.

A music video has emerged for Williams' ode to extremely memorable sex you won't remember the next day, "Spectacular." (Thanks to commenter KiaJD for the tip). Behold, the eroticization of the drunk girl!

In "Spectacular," Williams sings:

Last I remember I was face down
Ass up, clothes off, broke off, dozed off
Even though I’m not sure of his name
He could get it again if he wanted
Cause the sex was spectacular
The sex was spectacular
The sex was spectacular
The sex was spectacular

In the video, Williams is ass up, clothes off and very much awake as she performs a sexy and fully enthusiastic dance to lyrics about her being asleep while a man she doesn't know has (spectacular) sex with her. In the dance sequence, Williams expresses how being a passed-out recipient of "sex" made her feel—she felt sexy, confident, daring, and in control. Our drunk-sex researchers chalked up a woman's preference for intoxicated sex to body issues. Williams, apparently, just thinks it's hot.

Like it or not, the image of the "drunk girl" occupies an interesting space in popular culture. She's part wild girl, a sexually adventurous young woman in a shy girl's body, who just needs a bit of liquid courage to silence her inhibitions and access her sexual side. She's part Asking For It, an easy target for sexual coercion and rape who deserves to be punished for letting her guard down. Now, she's a fetish, too. The soft-core exhibitionism of Girls Gone Wild has made way for a genre of porn, targeted at heterosexual men, which mines the erotic potential of incoherently drunk women who are alternately sexually aggressive or asleep (Google "drunk sex" to find out what I'm talking about). There is also, of course, the works of Jamie Foxx.

Given Williams' girl power group audience, it looks like the sexiness of passing out is now being sold directly to women, and not to their sex partners. To me, "Spectacular" is the ultimate achievement in projecting a man's desire onto a woman's sexuality. Williams' "spectacular" sex is so centered on her partner's pleasure that she doesn't even inconvenience him by staying awake for it—and when she wakes up, she reassures him that it was the best sex she's ever had. Then again, I suppose Girls Gone Wild set the bar pretty low when it convinced drunk women to provide masturbatory material for thousands of subscribers in exchange for a free hat.

Have you always wanted to blame your casual sexual encounters on the Goose, but the words just never came out right? Put another way: Do you have a bunch of date-rapey sentiments to unload upon the general public, but don't want to have to use your recognizable, human voice? The "I Am T-Pain" iPhone application is here to help.

According to Pitchfork's review of T-Pain's new democratization of the Auto-Tune, the function "can make anyone's voice sound like that of a sex-addicted robot. I just tried it; it works." T-Pain has plenty of sketchy drunk sex jams to choose from, but the sketchiest is his lasting contribution to Jamie Foxx's Blame It (On the Alcohol). Give your $2.99 to T-Pain, and let's review:

Girl I know you feel good, just like you look
Couple more shots you open up like a book
I ain´t trippin (cause ima read ya)
Shawty I ain´t trippin  (I jus wanna please ya)
I'mma take a shot of Nuvo, shawty then you know
What's goin' down we can go and kick it like judo.

Ya know what I mean:
Shawty got drunk and thought it all was a dream,
So I made her say I, I, I, I!
Now she got her hand on my leg
And got my seats all wet in my ride (all wet in my ride)
All over my ride (all over my ride),
She look me dead in the eye (eye, eye, eye)
Then my pants got bigga and she already knew what to figga
Had her looking at her boyfriend like, fuck that nigga!

That's right, ladies: When T-Pain opens you up like a book in his ride, but you are so drunk you think you are sleeping, don't worry! You are allowed to wake up the next morning and blame it on the Goose (alternately, you may blame it on the 'Tron). What are we not to blame it on? You guessed it: T-Pain.

What says summer like boozy, blacked-out, ambiguously consensual fucking? Boozy, blacked-out, ambiguously consensual fucking that clocks in at 28 minutes and three seconds!

Burning Star Core was so inspired by everyone's favorite date-rape jam, Jamie Foxx's "Blame It (On the Alcohol), that they've compiled the song's many remixes into one epic 30-minute alcohol-soaked sex anthem. Download it here.

The song trades in so many booze and sex references, it's sometimes difficult to know what category of fluid these MCs are busy name-checking. But who caaaaaares: the important thing is that we all drink more until strangers are willing to hook up with us.

And so, after the jump: the ill-advised Blame it (On the Alcohol) Ultimate Remix drinking game:

Cover your beer with a napkin when you hear any of the following Alcohol references:

* drunk
* drank
* Goose
* bottle
* knocked out
* gin and tonic
* shots
* fluid
* designated driver
* vomit

Avoid eye contact with the closest creep when you hear any of the following Sex references:

* pocket rocket
* fucking
* ass
* bikini
* wet
* fluid
* bone
* pimp
* Barack
* Beyonce

* Disclaimer: Nobody ever play this game.

Photo by Shiny Things

When I first described Jamie Foxx's "Blame It (On the Alcohol)" as a date rape jam, I lamented that the song didn't allow Foxx's female target on the dance floor any input into the situation. "But what about the woman in the song?" I asked. "Of course, no holla back joint has dropped from Foxx’s fictional honey, so we can’t tell what she’s really thinking."

But I think I've found her! And she is Lady Gaga. In extreme boozin' song "Just Dance," Gaga declares:

"I've had a little bit too much, much."

"Where are my keys? I lost my phone."

"What's going on on the floor?"

"I can't see straight anymore."

"What's the name of this club?"

"How'd I turn my shirt inside out?"

Anyway, Lady Gaga is wasted. So what does she want to do now?:

Just dance, gonna be okay, da da doo-doo-mmm
Just dance, spin that record babe, da da doo-doo-mmm

Cool, whatever. Just dance, Lady. But goddamnit, here comes up-and-coming R&B artist Colby O'Donis:

Shawty I can see that you got so much energy
The way you're twirlin' up them hips 'round and 'round
And now there's no reason at all why you can't leave here with me
In the meantime stay and let me watch you break it down

Typical. Gaga just wants to dance! "Just," as in "only the dancing," is even in the title of the song. Colby O wants her to dance into his pants—and there's "no reason at all" why that shouldn't happen. Here's one reason: She can't figure out how her shirt got turned inside out.

Unfortunately, I can't figure out how this one ends because the lyrics then descend into incomprehensibility. Most agree that Gaga is saying "Spend the last dough / In your pocko" in the end there, but one interpretation offers a much more chilling ending: "It's been molesto / I got it / And your popped coll."

Molesto . . . Popped collar . . . AHHHHHHHHHH!

I've been writing a lot about date rape in popular culture lately, particularly in music. Most of my treatment has involved parsing the lyrics of popular songs with rape-scenario undertones: Asher Roth's soft indictment of college date rape; A Tribe Called Quest's anti-date rape, menstruation-joke opus; Slick Rick's anal-themed rape song. But do the songs at least sound good? And does that make them worse?

Yesterday, commenter Jelita Jane made a good point about date-rape songs: some of them are terrible (Britney Spears' "Blur"), some of them are awesome (Rod Stewart's "Tonight's the Night'—don't deny it)—and the success of the song often has little to do with how positive or negative its message is. Jelita Jane writes:

[The Toadies] have a song called Tyler that fully outlines a stalker/rapist’s nighttime jaunt into his obsession’s home. I don’t remember all the lyrics but I clearly recall, “I stumble in the hallway, outside her bedroom door/ I hear her call out to me, I hear the fear in her voice/ she pulls her covers tighter, I press against her door/ I will be with her tonight” it’s the creepiest song but somehow it’s still pretty awesome too . . .

A Hierarchy of Date Rape Jams:

Sweet, Positive Jams: Ever since Tupac "died," artists with the ability to craft sweet jams with positive messages have been few and far between. The best bet in crafting a song about rape that's good (and good for you!) is to go heavy on the social satire: i.e. babies being fed malt liquor; period jokes. See: Amanda Palmer's "Oasis"; A Tribe Called Quest's "The Infamous Date Rape."

Sweet, Neutral Jams: These songs are heavily date-rapey, but are, at least, mitigated through storytelling devices: i.e., told from the perspective of a creepy rapist/murderer; told through a fucked-up dream about rape and murder. See: Toadies' "Tyler"; Prince Paul's "Beautiful Night"

Meh: Just about anyone can write a middling track with date rape undertones. Pass. See: Sublime's "Date Rape"; Ludacris' "One More Drink"; 50 Cent's "She Wants It"; Asher Roth's "I Love College"

Terrible, Neutral Jams: Britney Spears should never write "message" songs! Like the rest of her songs, they still don't mean anything, and with Brit-Brit, it's about 70-30 that the song also totally sucks. See: Britney Spears' "Blur"

Terrible, Negative Jams: The hottest place in Billboard chart hell should be reserved for really, really, really bad songs that don't just condone—but advocate—rape. One reader suggested that listening to Slick Rick's ode to raping women in the butt is "more like actually getting date raped." Listening to Anal Cunt is, similarly, an unpleasant experience, but at least you can't tell what the fuck they're talking about. See: Anal Cunt's "You Were Too Ugly to Rape"; Slick Rick's "Adults Only"

Sweet, Negative Jams: These songs—which are fucking sweet except for their terrible date-rape themes—are the most dangerous of all. Oftentimes, the jam is so sweet, the hook so catchy, Rod Stewart so awesome, that the underlying rape message gets by without comment. I listened to Jamie Foxx's "Blame It (On the Alcohol)" three times before I realized how noxious it was. And it took CP movie reviewer Tricia Olszewski to reveal that epically sweet jam "Tonight's the Night" is actually about holing a virgin in your house in order to have sex with her. See: Rod Stewart's "Tonight's the Night"; Jamie Foxx's "Blame It (On the Alcohol); Frank Loesser's "Baby, It's Cold Outside"

Terrible, Positive Jams: Still on the lookout for terrible jams with really positive date-rape messages. While a really sweet jam might cause record labels to overlook the song's date-rapiness, a positive message can never make up for a really bad song. Might Kelly Osborne's "Don't Touch Me While I'm Sleeping" qualify?

[youtube:v=8C17yfGyJjM]

Meanwhile, back home, Jamie Foxx’s latest single, “Blame it (On the Alcohol),” is currently No. 3 on the Billboard Hot 100. Its video, featuring Ron Howard, Jake Gyllenhaal, and Samuel L. Jackson, enjoys a heavy rotation on U.S. MTV—despite an equally frothy date-rape theme. The song details Foxx’s pursuit of an increasingly drunk lady. The track also features T. Pain, who chimes through his hallmark vocoder: “Couple more shots you open up like a book.” The song is, essentially, an attempted date rape by a movie star and a dude who sounds like a robot:

[youtube:v=oQdwZm1kck0]

Who is allowed to make light of rape?

Foxx, an Academy Award–winning actor and recording artist, recently suggested that 16-year-old Miley Cyrus “make a sex tape and grow up.” Palmer, frontwoman for cabaret rock outfit the Dresden Dolls, explains on her blog that she has experienced both rape (at age 20) and abortion (at age 17). “[I] could try to win points by talking about [them],” Palmer writes, “but i actually DON’T believe those experiences should lend me any credibility.”

They don’t. Rape, along with infant death and the Holocaust, is one of comedy’s most taboo targets. Blogger and humorist Jon Wellington refers to rape as the comedian’s “Mordor.” Despite the stricture, popular culture will accept rape jokes when they’re delivered in the right context—and potential rapists are often granted more room to kid than potential (and actual) victims.

Threat level LOW: People Stereotypically Identified as Potential Date-Rapists
Includes: gangsta rappers, frat members

When A Tribe Called Quest released “The Infamous Date Rape,” in 1992, the New York Times decried the song as “just plain misogynistic.” Fifteen years of gangsta rap later, the track’s date-rape treatment has been reshelved as a smart dissection of misogyny itself. It’s also full of jokes. Shortly after the track condemns nonconsensual sex—“I don’t wanna bone you that much/That I would go for the unforbidden touch”—it presumes that the woman doesn’t want to bone only because she’s currently bleeding out of her vagina. “When you’re done with the pads can you come check me,” Q-Tip taunts.

[youtube:v=NThtPB-nEQc]

Asher Roth, a white rapper from Morrisville, Pa., also delivers a soft anti-rape blow, in his ode to undergraduate excess, “I Love College.” On its surface, “I Love College” condemns nonconsensual sex (“don’t have sex if she’s too gone”). So why would a commenter on a Village Voice article about Roth call his first album “nothing more than a soundtrack for date rape”?

Roth, like Q-Tip, takes pains to establish his masculinity despite his distaste for passed-out sex. At the beginning of the song’s video, Roth awakens on a fraternity house couch with a half-naked girl passed out on his lap. He doesn’t date-rape her: He just pushes her off onto the floor and starts drinking again. Later, when the party is in full swing, Roth boasts that he drank the party house dry as he “danced my face off and had this one girl completely naked.” He doesn’t date-rape her: He just uses her naked body to boost his cred.

[youtube:v=43pkqeamXe8]

Roth’s song sets limits for consensual sex—don’t do her if “she’s too gone”—while simultaneously urging college students to push those limits by getting wasted and getting it on—when she’s juuuust gone enough. In a fraternity house full of people partying naked until all the booze is gone, “she’s too gone” might start to seem pretty relative.

Roth is allowed to joke because the standard for frat-boy discourse on rape—as with gangsta rap—is so low. Writes one commenter on feminist blog Feministe: “I honestly didn’t expect that much because date rape is usually so fucking hilarious to frat boys."

Threat level GUARDED: People Not Stereotypically Identified as Date-Rapists
Includes: Jamie Foxx, women

Foxx hasn’t received any congratulations from feminist commentators regarding “Blame It (On the Alcohol)”; the nonconsensual undertones of Foxx’s song have simply been ignored in favor of continuous radio rotation. Jody Hill, who wrote and directed the Seth Rogen mall-cop vehicle Observe and Report, wasn’t let off the hook so easily. While Foxx’s song justifies its date-rape-y tone by simply denying the woman’s protestations, Hill’s film goes one step further—justifying its date rape joke by reserving the punch line for the female victim.

In an interview, Rogen explained:

When we’re having sex and she’s unconscious like you can literally feel the audience thinking, like, how the fuck are they going to make this okay? Like, what can possibly be said or done that I’m not going to walk out of the movie theater in the next thirty seconds? . . . And then she says, like, the one thing that makes it all okay: “Why are you stopping, motherfucker?”

In the film, the victim not only consents—she consents hilariously, with a line that relieves the hero of the charge of “date rape” status and relieves the audience of its voyeuristic guilt with a big laugh (never mind that she was actually unconscious). Date rape jokes are more difficult to slip into mainstream films than they are in the context of rap, which is why Hill and Rogen took pains to brand their film as desperately “edgy.” Still, writers can get a pass when they write the jokes for women.

Threat Level ELEVATED:
Includes: Don Imus

Don Imus should never make a joke about date rape.

Threat level SEVERE: Actual Victims of Sexual Assault
Includes: Dresden Dolls singer Amanda Palmer, former Jezebel blogger Moe Tkacik

It makes sense to be wary of women telling rape jokes written by men. But if rape jokes are considered so offensive because they run the risk of triggering the experience of an actual victim, how do we respond when the actual victim is telling the joke?

Last week, the Guardian shamed former Jezebel blogger Moe Tkacik for not reporting her college date rape to the police—and being sarcastic. “I had better things to do,” Tkacik once said of the assault. “Like drinking more.” When Tkacik first spoke out about her date rape on Jezebel, she also laced the experience with humor, writing: “When he, after about a half hour of fooling around, put on a condom I was like, ‘Whooooah, what are you doing?’ But I’d had two forties and I kept drifting in and out of consciousness—my tolerance, obviously, wasn’t what it is today—and I woke up to find him sticking it in.”

Never mind that a college sophomore may actually have better things to do than report a crime with little evidence and no witnesses, one that will enter her name and sexual experiences into the public record and possibly lead to a years-long legal battle: It was a joke. Critics—like women’s studies scholar Linda Hirshman and Daily Show creator Lizz Winstead—who didn’t find Tkacik’s joke funny argued that, as a victim of rape, she should know to speak responsibly on the issue of sexual assault. Feminism has criticized hip-hop, frat houses, and filmmakers for their own light treatment of rape, so it would make sense for the movement to shut out rape jokes from its own discourse, too. But the critics again fail to catch the context of the joke. Bloggers, like rappers, always have their tongues firmly in cheek. Feminist bloggers, then, are held to the highest standard—they must navigate between the sobriety of the women’s movement and the irony of the Internet.

Blogs have afforded individual women the opportunity to speak frankly and publicly about an issue too often relegated to fiction—their own sexual assaults. By holding sexual assault victims to a higher standard of seriousness, we’re doing something worse than blaming the victims: We’re stripping them of their right to contextualize their rape on their own terms. As Palmer wrote in defense of “Oasis,” (on her blog, naturally): “Humor is one of the strongest weapons that human beings have against suffering, death and fear.”

BONUS: A Hierarchy of Date Rape Jams (I made a chart!)

The Sexist is out for the weekend, so we're wrapping things up a little early this week. Today, kick off your Memorial Day holiday early by tying on a CockBib, throwing on some denim jeans, and blasting that new Jamie Foxx joint on the radio. Also, the Sexist reached its 1,000th blog post this week, which surely means something about where my life is headed.

1. Advice on How Not to Advise Women Not to Get Raped, in which a rape apologist by the name of "Rational Reader" rises again!

2. The Five Most Inappropriate CockBib Phrases, in which "Pussy Killer" isn't even the most inappropriate of all!

3. George F. Will Hates Jeans, in which the rich shall not deign to dress in the uniform of the proles.

4. Top Five Date Rape Anthems, or, a soundtrack to your acquaintance-rape-justification.

5. Why Sex Positivity is Bad for Feminism, in which I probably would have headlined this differently if I knew anyone was going to actually read it.

Yesterday, I assembled a Justify Your Date Rape playlist of five popular songs which deal with forcing someone you know to have sex with you. Most of the commenters on the post were arguing over the definition of "date rape"—and whether Jamie Foxx's joint, "Blame It (On the Alcohol)" qualifies (read the lyrics to the song here).

Mdesus wrote:

I don’t believe that the Foxx song describes date rape. In fact I don’t think it even comes close. . . . This girl gets drunk, and is flirting with these guys. She is talking about doing something she doesn’t normally do (sex). She’s not getting “date raped” she’s making a poor decision while she’s drunk. California may have some retarded law that basically says if the girl (and only the girl never the guy) is drunk then it’s automatically date rape. That does not make it true.

Isaac Beekman wrote:

Date rape exists, in part, because of a perceived blurry line between consent, and assault. That line ain’t really so blurry until people go around blurring it; for instance by asserting that something is ‘rapey’, meaning rape-like.

jenna wrote:

do you need the opinion of the person featured in something like foxx’s opus to qualify it as rape? so, do you need an inbalance of power to be experienced by BOTH the raper and the victim? the narration is sort of his perception of the situation, which overall has this sort of ‘i will conquer, you are powerless’ kind of feel. so that’s rapey on one part of the equation. but like does the girl also have to experience a sense of degradation or crappiness? . . . basically, whose experience of the situation matters more when you are establishing whether something is rape? the perpetrator’s or the victims? does it have to be both?

A friend of mine put it another way: "Can't a woman be coy anymore?"

So, what's rape, what's "rapey," and what's just "coy"? Let's start with the legal stuff.

Definitions vary be jurisdiction, but In the District of Columbia, you can commit First Degree Sexual Abuse by having sex with someone after using physical force, verbally threatening them, drugging them, or otherwise "rendering them unconscious"—which could include intentionally feeding them so many drinks that they pass out.

You can commit Second Degree Sexual Abuse by having sex with someone after just waiting until they are unconscious (even if you did not "render" them passed out), or having sex with them while they are incapable of knowing what's going on, incapable of "declining participation" in the act, or incapable of "communicating unwillingness" to participate in the act. In other words, if they're really crunk.

Misdemeanor Sexual Abuse, the least serious offense in D.C., can still carry up to 180 days in prison and a fine of $1,000. You can commit this misdemeanor by having sex with someone without their express permission.

So, let's take Foxx's song as an example. Did any sexual abuse occur in the song? No—this joint ends before they leave the club. That's why I describe Foxx's song as "rapey"—in my opinion, it encourages and even glamorizes tactics of date rapists. In other words, it lays out a scenario that could likely lead to a date rape. What tactics does Foxx use that could lead to jail time?

a) Not taking no for an answer: willfully denying the woman's expressed verbal "unwillingness" to have sex ("she said she usually don't / but i know that she front")

b) Attempting to alter her state of consciousness in order to have sex with her ("I ain't saying what you wanna do / but you know we probly gon' do" . . . "ooh see, she spilled some drink on me / and now I'm knowing she tipsy")

If Foxx and this woman did later have sex, he could be in trouble if a judge, jury, and an alcohol toxicology expert witness confirmed that she either a) was passed out, b) wasn't passed out but didn't know what was going on, c) wasn't passed out but couldn't communicate that she didn't want to have sex, or simply d) did not expressly consent to the act. It doesn't help that Foxx clearly announced his intentions prior to the act in order to coerce this woman into bed with alcohol (remember, if you attempt to commit any of the above offenses, you can be liable as well). Oh, and if T. Pain (and his vocoder) get involved? any of the acts, when "aided or abetted by one or more accomplices," can carry a sentence 1.5 times harsher than the usual maximum jail time.

If Foxx and this woman do have sex at a time when she's awake and mentally capable of consent, and she does consent to all the acts, and she's of age, then Foxx is probably off the hook, legally, as a "date rapist." Still, any attempt to have sex with someone by encouraging that person to "make a mistake" by fucking you is disgusting and rapey (this goes for men and women).

But what about the woman in the song? Of course, no holla back joint has dropped from Foxx's fictional honey, so we can't tell what she's really thinking. How can we tell if she's just "flirting" and acting "coy"?

Again, as far as the legal system is concerned, it doesn't really matter if she is into Jamie Foxx, if she really, really, wants to have sex with him, and if she's only denying his advances in order to play "hard to get." All that matters is whether she's legally able to consent to the act when the act occurs (a point that, we can assume, comes after the song ends).

More problematic, however, is the fact that we don't hear from this woman—and that her actual inclination to fuck Jamie Foxx doesn't seem to matter to Jamie Foxx (or to, you know, the recording industry in general). Instead, Foxx places this woman in an outdated model of female consent that allows him to fuck her in the easiest way possible, (before the weekend is over, and he skips town)—whether she wants it or not

The model Foxx choses is a familiar one: Woman says no, man coerces her with the aid of alcohol until she says yes. Implicit in the Foxx Model is the idea that women are never allowed to fully, enthusiastically, and SOBERLY consent to sex. If Jamie Foxx approached a woman, asked her to have sex, and she consented on her own terms, that would make her "easy." And so, Foxx insists that the woman find outside force to "blame" for her promiscuity (in this case, henny, vodka, and tron). That way, she never has to admit that she desires to experience any sexual pleasure (and she doesn't get to blame Foxx, either).

This is why the song is so problematic: under the Foxx model, the opinion of the woman he chooses to target is unimportant. If the woman doesn't want to have sex with him, he assumes that all she needs is more alcohol to overcome her "coyness." If she does want to have sex with him, he still assumes she needs more alcohol—to cover for her "sluttiness." Either way, Foxx's interest is in devaluing the woman's right to choose—even if the choice is to fuck Jamie Foxx.

But Foxx and Pain aren't the first to make raping someone you know into record gold. Below, five of the most notable date rape anthems in recording history.

[youtube:v=2Jw24LbeV-w]

Date Rape Anthem: Jamie Foxx's "Blame It (On the Alcohol)," in which Foxx attempts to fuck a woman who "says she usually don't" but that he knows is "frontin" because "she don't wanna seem like she's easy." (But she is). Foxx knows she's ready to admit she wants it when "she spilled some drink on me / And now I'm knowin' she tipsy." My neighbor has this song as her ringtone.

Relevant Lyrics:

Blame it on the goose, gotcha feeling loose
Blame it on the 'tron, gotcha panties off
Blame it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol, blame it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol
Blame it on the vodka, blame it on the henny
Blame it on the blue tap got you feeling dizzy
Blame it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol, blame it on the ah-ah ah-ah ah-al-co-hol

Why It's So Rapey: She doesn't want it until she's had such a serious combination of cocktails that she's spilling drinks on Jamie Foxx. Foxx, of course, knew better than she alllll alongggg.

—

[youtube:v=F5Cf5OusjrQ]

Date Rape Anthem: The Toadies' "Possum Kingdom," a first-person appeal to a future rape/murder victim to go with the Toadies' ultimate skeezy dude "behind the boathouse."

Relevant Lyrics:

Make up your mind
Decide to walk with me
Around the lake tonight
By my side
I'm not gonna lie
I'll not be a gentleman
Behind the boathouse
I'll show you my dark secret

Why It's So Rapey: More a date-murder anthem, the Toadies still suggest that she'll "Give it up to me, Give it up to me" before she becomes his "angel."

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[youtube:v=1WBttO4UzSw]

Date Rape Anthem: Sublime's "Date Rape," a ska jaunt through a woman's acquaintance rape, her legal battle, and the rapist's punishment. Popular among Arizona middle school students.

Relevant Lyrics:

Thats when things got out of control.
She didnt want to, he had his way.
She said, lets go
He said, no way!
Come on babe its your lucky day.
Shut your mouth, were gonna do it my way.
Come on baby dont be afraid,
If it wasnt for date rape Id never get laid.

Why It's So Rapey: This date rape song has a positive moral ending: "It does not pay / Drunk and horny." But it then goes on to advocate for prison rape: "Well, I cant take pity on men of his kind," Sublime's Bradley Nowell sings. "Even though he now takes it in the behind."

—

[youtube:v=X9re6CQZGFw]

Date Rape Anthem: Frank Loesser's "Baby, It's Cold Outside," a tug-of-war duet between an unwilling female and a drink-mixing male. Penned in 1944, decades before the term "date rape" entered our collective consciousness.

Relevant Lyrics:

I really can't stay—Baby it's cold outside
I've got to go away—Baby it's cold outside
This evening has been—Been hoping that you'd drop in
So very nice—I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice
My mother will start to worry—Beautiful, what's your hurry
My father will be pacing the floor—Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I'd better scurry—Beautiful, please don't hurry
well Maybe just a half a drink more—Put some music on while I pour

The neighbors might think—Baby, it's bad out there
Say, what's in this drink—No cabs to be had out there
I wish I knew how —Your eyes are like starlight now
To break this spell—I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell
I ought to say no, no, no, sir—Mind if I move a little closer
At least I'm gonna say that I tried—What's the sense in hurting my pride
I really can't stay—Baby don't hold out
Ahh, but it's cold outside

Why It's So Rapey: Dubbed by Urban Dictionary as the "Christmas Date Rape Song," "Baby, It's Cold Outside" has endured as a classic date rape anthem because (a) it was ahead of its time; (b) the lyrics are unimaginably date-rapey—the woman tells the man her "answer is no," but he continues to ply her with drinks and exaggerated weather-based fears until she sleeps over; and (c) it's nevertheless celebrated as a Christmas classic.

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[youtube:v=yJj8_6VhAyI]

Date Rape Anthem: Anal Cunt's "You Were Too Ugly to Rape So I Beat the Shit Out of You," a song which claims to have lyrics.

Relevant Lyrics:

I drank a case of whiskey
And you looked like Jeanine Jizm
I drank another case of whiskey
And you looked like Roseannie Barr

Why It's So Rapey: Okay, I'm not sure "I drank a case of whiskey" qualifies as a date, and Anal Cunt does decide to "beat the shit" out of her instead of raping her, and I'm pretty sure they don't actually say anything in this song, but I think it still counts.