As you can see, Begala schooled, punished, crucified and murdered McCain in some sort of live televised pornographic snuff film! Given the creepy terminology the media’s been throwing around here, I’m surprised no one has referred to the exchange as a “spanking” yet. Oh wait, yeah, somebody did.

The Huffington Post invokes the school-girl theme more subtly in its characterization of the interaction, writing that Begala “schools” her and that McCain was “taken to task” by him:

But McCain also pointed a finger at the Obama administration in Bush’s defense, saying she felt that the Obama administration “has to stop completely blaming everything on its predecessor.” When Maher asked McCain if she really thought this is what Obama is doing, McCain said “I do to a degree.” A clearly annoyed Begala immediately shook his head and said “not to enough of a degree, I’m sorry not nearly enough.” He then began to explain how President Reagan blamed Jimmy Carter for years, to which McCain responded blithely “you know I wasn’t born yet so I wouldn’t know.” Going in for the kill, Begala fired back “I wasn’t born during the French Revolution but I know about it.” And it only got more embarrassing for McCain from there.

McCain is clearly no match for a televised debate with Paul Begala—few people are. Begala made a living ridiculing Republicans on CNN until 2005 on Crossfire (and that credit alone makes him calling Fox News a “comedy show” kind of hilarious). I don’t disagree that the appearance was probably a bit embarrassing for McCain, but the popular reaction to this two-minute exchange has been uncomfortably gleeful. Somehow, watching a 48-year-old analyst verbally beat up on a 24-year-old blogger doesn’t excite me as much as media reports have indicated it should. The whole clip makes me a bit ill, actually: the insane shrieking from the audience;Maher moving to physically shield McCain, as if she needs the host’s protection from Paul fucking Begala; and later, the characterization of Begala as McCain’s “teacher” who schools, punishes, spanks, and, uh, yeah, murders her for her comments.

If we can sift through the bloodbath for a second, I think the point should be made that nobody—even the seasoned political analyst—manages to say anything substantive in this video clip. McCain thinks Obama is blaming Bush for his problems—a pretty easy argument for anyone to knock down. Instead, Begala invokes Ronald Reagan’s blaming of Jimmy Carter for no apparent reason. McCain’s response—”I wasn’t born yet so I wouldn’t know”—doesn’t work the way it should. But I see what she was trying to do with it: She was attempting a self-deprecating acknowledgment of her inexperience while making a fair point—Ronald Reagan is dead, has been out of office for 20 years, and is irrelevant to this discussion. Begala swipes the point aside—you know, what the fuck Ronald Regan has to do with this—by declaring that he knows about a bunch of things that happened before he was born. Cue the shrieks: She got ZINGED.

Of course, shows like Maher’s are more about the zings than the issues, and McCain could probably use some more practice in both. Casting her as Paul Begala’s school-girl, however, gets a little bit too close to political nerd erotica for my personal taste.

George Bush instated the rule a little over eight years ago, on the 2001 anniversary of Roe v. Wade. Before him, Bill Clinton had reversed the rule that, before him, Ronald Reagan had thought up for the very first time. The Guardian calls it “the most contentious move of [Obama's] young administration,” which isn’t saying so much, and really, what could have been more predictable?

The Bush administration today issued a sweeping new regulation that protects a broad range of health-care workers—from doctors to janitors—who refuse to participate in providing services that they believe violate their personal, moral or religious beliefs.

The controversial rule empowers federal health officials to cut off federal funding for any state or local government, hospital, clinic, health plan, doctor’s office or other entity if it does not accommodate employees who exercise their “right of conscience.”

Hey, I wonder who will make the most inane comment on this inane rule? Will it be President George W. Bush? Family Research Council President Tony Perkins? Does Sarah Palin have anything to say about this?

No, okay, let’s settle on Assistant Secretary of Health Joxel Garcia! “Many health-care providers routinely face pressure to change their medical practice—often in direct opposition to their personal convictions,” Garcia said.

Don’t you just hate it when the government comes a-knockin’ at your federally funded business which has been operating PERFECTLY WELL THANK YOU and says you change like EVERYTHING AROUND just to accommodate the constitutional rights of other people? Next they’ll be saying that bus drivers “have” to let black people ride in the front, or that poll workers “have” to let women vote. Thank you President Bush for protecting MY right to use American taxpayer’s money to deny those American taxpayers their own rights.

Wait a minute . . . based on this ruling, could a federal employee—say, I don’t know, Barack Obama—refuse to grant federal funding to one of these anti-contraception, anti-abortion medical providers based on his “right to conscience”? Something to look into!

[Also of interest: For this week's paper, I wrote a story about how pharmacists are denying birth control based on "conscience"---or, you know, whatever].

This week’s contest was true to form: It featured a photo of President Bush appearing to prepare to slap the ass of a member of the U.S. Women’s Beach Volleyball Team, then asked readers to create a funny caption to illustrate the visual. (Note: This is at least the second in Fishbowl’s ass-slapping-themed photo series). These were the finalists:

May-Treanor shows President Bush her finesse, and he goes for the kill.

Now that’s what I call a weapon of mass destruction!

President Bush executes a ‘sneak-and-peak’ search warrant on the U.S. women’s volleyball team

I sure hope Laura is not looking.

It’s just like foreign policy and Iraq: Hit it and quit it!

Mr. President, I poop on your foreign policy!

That’s funny, Laura has the same tattoo.

Here…pull my finger, or do I pull yours?

Nothing yet, keep pushing.

“Now that’s what I call a weapon of mass destruction!” was the best D.C. media could do. Do we have only ourselves to blame? Or is there simply no way to resist the groan-inducing, frat-ready punchline when presented with month-and-a-half-old Presidential bikini shots and homosocial baseball embraces?

Laws that have been on the books for some 30 years already allow doctors to refuse to perform abortions. The new rule would go further, ensuring that all employees and volunteers for health care entities can refuse to aid in providing any treatment they object to, which could include not only abortion and sterilization but also contraception.

Following the rule’s official announcement is a 30-day comment period before the rule goes into effect. Only two days remain in that period, which ends September 25. Planned Parenthood is urging those opposed to the rule to send a form letter to the Department of Health and Human Services voicing their opinion on the rule.

Letter after the jump.

I am writing to oppose the so-called “conscience” rule recently submitted by Secretary Leavitt. This regulation poses a serious threat to women’s health care by limiting the rights of patients to receive complete and accurate health information and services.

At a time when more and more families are uninsured and under economic assault, we find our health care system is in crisis and our president taking steps to deny access to basic care. Women’s ability to manage their own health care is at risk of being compromised by politics and ideology.

[Add your own comments here about why you oppose the administration's decision.]

Sincerely,

[Your name]
[Your address]