I'm not too familiar with online communities like AntiMisandry.com, a Web site dedicated to the cause of "curing feminist indoctrination." Since feminism is an affliction from which I suffer, it looks like I'm going to have to cure myself before I commence ridding the world of misandry. You know the old saying: One must truly begin to love onself before one may begin to blame all bad things on feminism.

Feminists, as is proper, hate men (RAARRRGGHHH). And yet, our deep, anti-discriminatory instincts tell us that in order to end misogyny, we must also work to end misandry. We're so torn!

And so, I've decided to delve into AntiMisandry.com to see if the anti-misandrists and the feminists can ever learn to love one another. Someone tell Matthew McConaughey, because I smell rom-com!

First, the unexpected attraction: A quick perusal of the AntiMisandry.com FAQ reveals the Web site to be as concerned withdiscrimination as your average feminist. AntiMisandry.com has strict rules against personal attacks in its forums (topics of discussion include "Female Paedophiles" and "Stupidity," but who am I to judge?). The following is a list of "discriminatory remarks & personal attacks" that AntiMisandry.com does not tolerate:

* Affiliations (male-centric for example)
* Color
* Disabilities (of any form)
* Female Centric threads (non male, father, boy, husband specific)
* Geographical local
* Military and/or Veteran Status (statements like baby killers, murderers etal)
* Misandrous global/generalizations (Obviously – See the name of the site!)
* Personal attributes (Cut/Uncut etal)
* Race
* Religious Beliefs
* Sexual Preference

So, AntiMisandry.com does not tolerate racist, homophobic, or anti-semitic postings on its Web site. It rejects any discrimination against the disabled. And it welcomes readers with all different styles of penis (circumcised and uncircumcised). Swoon!

On the other hand, it considers posts about women to be "personal attacks." But let's give the AntiMises the benefit of the doubt and chalk that up to editorial-decision jitters—after all, this is a space to talk about misandry, not misogyny. I shouldn't be so picky!

Let's take a look at the bright side! The site bans holocaust and slavery deniers (bonus!). What's more, AntiMisandry.com also rejects sexist and racist terms—the site's list of unacceptable "derogatory labels" ranges from "cocksucker" to "kraut." And here's the kicker: AntiMisandry.com explicitly bans the word "cunt." My hero!

But then, all of a suddent, AntiMisandry.com changed. Behold, the inevitable bombshell:

Search results for the word "kraut" (2)

Search results for the word "cocksucker" (6)

Search results for the word "cunt" (101)

Whaaa—but—how can this be? "Cunt" is a definitive no-no on AntiMisandry.com. And AntiMisandry.com would never lie to me! Would you, AntiMisandry.com? There must be some explanation for this!

And there is: "Please note that if the label is indeed used, CONTEXT will of course be taken into consideration."

Oh, of course! The context of "cunt." Whew. Baby. I knew I was overreacting. Your 101 posts referencing "cunt" must really be delving into the progressive, Vagina Monologue-y, I'm-taking-"cunt"-back context, right, AntiMisandry.com?

Right? Anti?

Well, let's take a look. First, we have the "cunt journalist" context:

The confusingly laudatory "alpha cunt" context:

And my personal favorite, the context of "cuntoon":

AntiMisandry.com, you bastard. I knew I never should have fallen for you. Sure, the part of me that hopes to score a lucrative movie deal out of this experience wants to say, "you had me at cuntoon." But the part of me that hopes to never hear the word "cuntoon" again, however, needs to say goodbye.

Obviously, this is no good. But after Long faults the group of men, the unsympathetic bartender, and the cops, she turns to an unsuspecting target of blame for violence against women: Barack Obama. Long details why Obama may be to blame for her friend's battered face:

I think we cannot dismiss the election's place in all this. The world watched as Hillary Clinton and Sara Palin were eviscerated by the main stream media. Calling women C**** was tolerated. Demeaning and disrespecting women was deemed OK. A young potent male was victorious over an older women. It was a symbolic victory on many deep psychological levels. I am afraid last night was just the beginning and that there will be more crimes against women. Times have changed and not for the better. I can smell it in the air.

Another blogger chimed in, calling the post-election U.S. "Open Season on Women" and tapping her post on the incident with a "Thanks Barack":

[Obama] has used misogyny to stir up hatred of women in the media and on the blogs that supported him. Now that the genie is out of the bottle, it won’t soon be put back. We are going to be dealing with this for a long time to come.

Hey, I want a lady to be president as much as anybody. But I'll take a real victory for women over a symbolic one any day. I've yet to see the evidence of whatever misogynist genie Barack Obama and Joe Biden have conjured up in their campaign, but I'm willing to bet it will satisfy more lady wishes than a ticket that opposed abortion, forced women to pay for their own rape kits, put women's health in sarcastic finger quotes and, you know, actually called somebody a cunt. Thanks a lot, Barack Obama. Thanks a lot.