According to Slate's William Saletan, whose abortiony rhetorical stylings my colleagues and I have discussed at length, "Sixteen million girls are missing in China."
Holy shit, China. How did you manage to lose all these little girls?! Prepare to send out the biggest fucking Amber alert of all time!
Oh wait, this is Saletan we're talking about—the [...]

Condoms.
The U.S. Agency for International Development, or USAID, helps fight AIDS by distributing tens of millions of condoms worldwide. The initiative hasn't just helped to save lives—it's also supported the jobs of hundreds of U.S. condom-makers. But the AIDS-fighting, job-creating super match-up couldn't last: The U.S. government is now switching its condom source to lower-cost [...]

Stop right now: Do not put that chocolate-flavored body spread on your penis. Better leave it off your nipples, too.
According to a Reuters report this morning, British sex shops have discovered the industry chemical melamine in a line of Chinese-produced body products meant to be applied to the nipples and penis. Last month, melamine in [...]