The Washington Improv Theater’s most recent newsletter—entitled “Barebreasted Women Swordfighting and Kids Programming at Source”—offers up some great naked swordplay this week, for the kids. Somebody isn’t thinking of The Children:

I’m pretty sure these two items are simply unfortunately juxtaposed, and entirely unrelated. Meanwhile, “Barebreasted Women Swordfighting and Kids” is still available for someone’s  inevitable childhood trauma memoir.

In my column this week, I profiled local mammographer and inventor Ella Laseinde, who created the Shield-Me-Baby Nursing Bib to allow women to breast-feed in public without flashing everybody. Laseinde’s product isn’t the only contraption on the market that encourages public breast-feeding while discouraging public displays of mommy’s food-source. Hundreds of inventors have patented similar devices. Many: weird.

Bizarre Breast-feeding Contraption: The Breastfeeding Hat

Read More “Bizarre Breastfeeding Contraption #1: The Breastfeeding Hat” »

Nothing to see here: Laseinde wants newborns to suck and cover.

Ella Laseinde is accustomed to seeing strangers’ breasts. “I’m a mammographer, so I’m with the breasts constantly,” says Laseinde, 71, who spent 30 years in government service—including five at the National Institutes of Health screening women’s chests. That’s not to say she’s interested in catching sight of stray bosoms outside the office. “I think in today’s time, they need to cover,” Laseinde says of nursing mothers. “There are so many people walking around who can catch a look.”

Read More “Public Breast-Feeding: What the Nursing Bib Means for the Right to Bare Breasts” »

Caught in the headlights: Earl is master of the Hunt.

Show Earl a photo of a topless woman, and he’ll respond like most heterosexual men—sure, he’ll take a look at the boobs. Show Earl two photos of a topless woman, and he’ll ditch the boobs—that’s an amateur move—and look for the color of her thong, the pattern of her rug, or how many eyes her dog has.

Earl is a connoisseur of Erotic Photo Hunt, an electronic bar game that puts a bawdy twist on the “spot the difference” puzzles that fill out kids magazines or the comics page. The rules of Erotic Photo Hunt are simple. Drop in a quarter. Choose “Babes” or “Hunks.” Inspect two photos of the same soft-core pinup, identical except for five Photoshopped differences. Touch all the variations before time runs out, and you advance to the next round. Each round is faster than the last. Never go straight for the boobs—differences are most likely to reveal themselves in the less titillating areas of the screen, like foliage, motorcycles, or pets.

“It’s like playing the one-eyed monster,” says Earl, a semi-retired mechanic who prefers to go by his first name. “You just put your money in, and it just takes it and stares back at you—challenging you.”

Read More “Breast Practices: Insider Tips from D.C.’s Greatest Erotic Photo Hunter” »