Having A Butt Won’t Change Your Life
As someone who has always had an ass that's slightly out of proportion with the rest of her body, I was interested to hear about the benefits that ass-enhancing undergarment "Booty Pop" was selling. Indulge me, Booty Pop. List the virtues of my fat ass:
Apparently, by having a butt, I reap a variety of benefits. They include:
* Never having to look at the changing room mirror and think: "Not-so-sexy bottom."
* Having what "all women want without lifting a finger."
* Knowing that my ass makes me "just like the celebrities."
* Having my clothes fit better.
* Feeling more confident.
* Being able to forget about doing "endless squats."
* Never having to worry about paying for expensive cosmetic butt surgery.
* Looking and feeling like I "spent a fortune."
I have to admit: Some of these butt benefits are real. I've never considered having plastic surgery on my butt, or performing squats "endlessly," or applying the phrase "not-so-sexy bottom" to myself.
On the other hand, my fat ass has yet to usher me into the world of the big-bottomed celebrity elite. I haven't figured out how to summon my ass weight in order to boost my confidence at home or in the workplace. I can't say that anyone has ever looked at my ass and said, "Damn—that looks expensive." And, no, pants don't fit. Ever.
Some have argued that the existence of Booty Pop reflects the shifting of traditional beauty standards. As PostBourgie's G.D. writes: "You could probably make a pretty compelling argument that traces the mainstreaming of this aesthetic to hip-hop’s cultural dominance and its obsession with all things callipygous."
Not to get too deep on the Booty Pop phenomenon, but I think the product just reflects the fact that the beauty industry has figured out how to prey on a wider range of insecurities. You want a smaller butt? You can buy some life-changing underwear, too. Require a bigger ass? Strap on a Booty Pop. Now, we're just waiting for the underwear executive genius who can figure out how to "fix" the woman who thinks her current butt size is just right.