Comments on: Rape Prevention Tips From Rapists: Stay Inside Or Die A Horrible Death

By: Manpocolypse or Armaggedude? | Not a Dirty Word

Manpocolypse or Armaggedude? | Not a Dirty Word — Thu, 17 Jun 2010 14:57:39 +0000

[...] who are sexualized and objectified – even so literally as sexbots; women who told it was their own fault for getting raped because they were drunk, wearing sexy clothes, or walking alone at night [...]

By: When things are right « Really? Law?

When things are right « Really? Law? — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 23:26:28 +0000

[...] you don’t know that we often blame the victim for the assault. We do. We do. We do. We do (followed by the even worse We Do). I think we all know that we [...]

By: scents.that.attract.men

scents.that.attract.men — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 09:40:33 +0000

Hi pleasant post. I imagine these crowns might be structural also. Now the good pick up arguments are the ones that flatter the woman. At Present several of the lines might just be in all pleasant fun to help break the ice. That is great and it can at last lead to finishing in sleep together with her at the end of the night. Heck what man doesn't want that, but familiar what to articulate and how to pull it off can demand a bit of practise. A serious pick up line will make you in the door but from there you have to be capable enough to support the conversation working.

By: Sexual Assault Prevention Tips Guaranteed to Work « Maailma feministin silmin

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 19:37:58 +0000

[...] joiden avulla raiskauksen voi muka välttää. Jos et tiedä mistä on kyse, voit lukea esim. Rape Prevention Tips From Rapists: Stay Inside Or Die A Horrible Death ja tuohon samaan kiertosähköpostiin liittyvän artikkelin Snopesista: Assaulted [...]

By: Gravity’s Rainbow » Blog Archive » What I’ve Noticed

Gravity’s Rainbow » Blog Archive » What I’ve Noticed — Sat, 19 Sep 2009 12:42:22 +0000

[...] sarcozona Sexual assault prevention tips guaranteed to work: men, don’t rape people; women, just stop having a vagina to tempt the rapists. Postcards from a green future by Liam Young & Darryl [...]

By: MrsS

MrsS — Mon, 24 Aug 2009 03:24:21 +0000

I think that this sort of advice is intended to put the victim at fault - essentially it states that living a normal life as a full-fledged adult is "asking for it."

By: Jan

Jan — Thu, 20 Aug 2009 05:03:08 +0000

Sweetie, this is so old. I'm embarrassed for you.

By: Mrs. D

Mrs. D — Mon, 17 Aug 2009 14:28:34 +0000

Thomas, I have a question for you, if you ever come back again...how much more likely is a distracted woman to be carjacked, mugged, or robbed in a parking lot than raped? Okay, you guessed it, that was kind of a rhetorical question...in 2007 (via the FBI's Uniform Crime Report), the forcible rape rate was 30/100,000 population, while the robbery rate was 147.6/100,000 and the motor vehicle theft rate was 363.3/100,000. While I know that the motor vehicle rate includes cars stolen while unoccupied/unattended, and the stats for all include both genders, the fact that there are nearly 5 times as many robberies (which are separated from burglaries in the crime reports, and defined as "Robbery—The taking or attempting to take anything of value from the care, custody, or control of a person or persons by force or threat of force or violence and/or by putting the victim in fear.") and over 12 times more car thefts make me ask "why the focus on rape?" Don't get me wrong, I think that rape is a terrible thing. But by focusing on RAPE prevention rather than CRIME prevention (you ARE much more likely to be robbed if you're gabbing away on the phone with no care for your surroundings), we're focusing on the one crime most frequently associated with a woman's sexuality. Would anyone ever say "she deserved it" to a woman who was smashed over the head with a rock and robbed, regardless of what she was doing? But people DO say that about women who have been raped. So Thomas, please alter your course to focus on CRIME prevention. Stop using rape as a scare tactic, it only strengthens what Amanda is arguing against here.

By: Thomas Farlin

Thomas Farlin — Fri, 14 Aug 2009 18:47:42 +0000

The article is a bit much (which I guess was your purpose). We are a company that teaches rape prevention techniques to women. No.. we don't want women to be afraid to step outside - we just want them to be alert in high risk situations (like parking lots, etc): forget the cell phone for a few seconds until you get to your car. Beyond the obvious preemptive approach - we want to suggest that women fight back if they find themselves in a worst case scenario. Empowerment! One of the other comments that holds very true is with regards to 'Acquaintance Rape' or 'Date Rape' - much more prevalent than 'Stranger Rape'. There has to be a middle of the road - and that starts with individuals who look out for their own safety.

Take a look at the site: http://www.hitselfdefense.com

By: links for 2009-08-13 « Embololalia

links for 2009-08-13 « Embololalia — Thu, 13 Aug 2009 18:04:12 +0000

[...] Rape Prevention Tips From Rapists: Stay Inside Or Die A Horrible Death – The Sexist – Wa... As we’ve seen before, targeting rape prevention advice at women can start off as empowering, and slowly descend into crippling—or worse, preemptive victim blaming. I don’t know—maybe it’s because I hesitate to take the advice of convicted rapists. But something tells me that it might be more worthwhile focus our efforts on the rapists who rape people, instead of burdening every woman with paranoia, hairstyle advice, and unnecessary umbrellas. (tags: sexualviolence rapeapology advice gender crime) [...]

By: jules

jules — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 18:21:46 +0000

@Dave: Amanda is not trying to say that this email forward is legit. Its obviously a bunch of bullshit tips. Her point is that someone wrote it, and people are still passing it around, to scare women into thinking that we're always going to be victims. The email is obviously old, low quality spam...but its still being circulated for its original purpose: instilling fear.

By: Ashley

Ashley — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 21:45:28 +0000

@db--check out the Mentors in Violence Prevention program (MVP). It's a great violence prevention program developed by experts in the field. No reason to reinvent the wheel.

By: mdesus

mdesus — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 21:39:19 +0000

my super effective strategy to avoid raping a girl is finishing in my pants first.

By: Paranoid or Dead: The Modern Woman’s Dilemma : Speaking Out.

Paranoid or Dead: The Modern Woman’s Dilemma : Speaking Out. — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 21:36:34 +0000

[...] actually full of some pretty victim-blaming stuff. Well, I just came across a blog post at The Sexist that tackles the same email and it was just too hilariously on-point not to [...]

By: Amanda Hess

Amanda Hess — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 20:16:16 +0000

@db Really good question, and one that I can't begin to answer. But I'd love to hear from anyone who works with boys about good strategies!

By: db

db — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 18:17:55 +0000

To avoid rape... don't get drunk near penises. i've been hoping my employer (education) would let me talk to young men who might be at risk for rape. What does that mean? A shot in the dark... i'd guess folks who don't have a problem with giving a woman a few drinks. People with demeaning thoughts of women. People who think of sex as "some" which must be "got". Finding them is only half the battle. What to talk about? Enthusiastic consent? Pulling a Jimmy Stewart at 2am ("no, you're drunk... goodnight")

By: Amanda Hess

Amanda Hess — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 18:10:40 +0000

Wrack---I think we're in agreement here. Your sarcastic point---"the friendlier you get, the more likely it is that convivial Dr. Jekyll is to turn into Mr. Hyde the Acquaintance Rapist"---is exactly the sarcastic point I was trying to make, but maybe that got lost in the translation. Attempting to police female behavior---whether it's having friends, wearing skirts, or going out at night---is not an effective or reasonable solution. When I said "begin to tackle the problem of acquaintance rape," I meant just what I had said earlier---preventing rapists from raping. Focusing attention on acquaintance rape does NOT mean stopping girls from having relationships with men---it means acknowledging that ending rape is a lot harder than avoiding a couple of psychos. And the reason it's so hard is that we have to begin to focus efforts on preventing acquaintance rapists from raping, too---and to acknowledge that those people are our children, significant others, and friends. That's hard.

By: Wrack

Wrack — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 17:56:15 +0000

Wait a minute, Amanda -- now you're implying that women shouldn't be friends with men, because the friendlier you get, the more likely it is that convivial Dr. Jekyll is to turn into Mr. Hyde the Acquaintance Rapist. I mean, I accept that acquaintance rape is a more prevalent problem, and I think this is a great article, but if you targeted rape prevention at acquaintance rape, you'd still be pushing toward a population of women "paralyzed by a fear of rape" -- just this time, from their male friends/partners. Like you said before, shouldn't the focus of prevention be the (potential) rapists themselves... regardless of whether they assault strangers or acquaintances?

By: Dave

Dave — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 17:45:43 +0000

Way to be up on the times:

http://www.snopes.com/crime/prevent/rape.asp

What's next? Complaints about free AOL discs? Sharing the hamster dance site?

By: Amanda Hess

Amanda Hess — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 16:50:26 +0000

@jules --- that's a great point. and it's interesting to think about why rape prevention is targeted at the very rare stranger rape, as opposed to the more common acquaintance rape. i think that despite the sheer numbers, people don't want to acknowledge that acquaintance rape exists. they don't want to acknowledge that people who rape people are our friends and significant others and relatives. they don't want to admit that the problem runs much deeper than a few female karate classes to combat a handful of sociopaths stalking the streets. and they don't want to admit that women can't prevent rape by dressing more conservatively, or driving less, or keeping a male friend around them at all times. sure, that friend is a lot more likely to rape her than any stranger in a white van. but it's a lot easier to dole out condescending advice to women than to begin to tackle the problem of acquaintance rape.

By: Lindsay

Lindsay — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 16:37:16 +0000

The third paragraph in your introduction is why I attended EXACTLY ONE session of a "self-defense class" being taught by off-duty cops at my then-local YWCA. Thanks, guys.

By: jules

jules — Mon, 10 Aug 2009 16:22:31 +0000

I think I first got this forwarded to me a few years ago, when I was living in a really white-bread midwest sorority house. I found something interesting about "my sisters" who were forwarding this email. While they were wanting us all to be aware of the dangers of being raped in parking lots and alleys, they were ignoring a much realer possibility. The possibility of being raped, on campus, by a friend or acquaitance.

None of the women I know have ever been raped by a stranger in an alley. Several have been raped and assaulted by guys they knew well. Also scary...