The Sexist

Top Five Date Rape Anthems

Date rape has been getting some pretty heavy rotation on the airwaves since Jamie Foxx's latest single, "Blame It (On the Alcohol)," dropped. The song details Foxx's pursuit of an increasingly drunk lady in da club, and features T. Pain, who chimes in on his vocoder: "Couple more shots you open up like a book." If you want to know what it's like to be double-date-raped by a movie star and a dude who speaks only through a vocoder, this song is for you.

But Foxx and Pain aren't the first to make raping someone you know into record gold. Below, five of the most notable date rape anthems in recording history.

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Date Rape Anthem: Jamie Foxx's "Blame It (On the Alcohol)," in which Foxx attempts to fuck a woman who "says she usually don't" but that he knows is "frontin" because "she don't wanna seem like she's easy." (But she is). Foxx knows she's ready to admit she wants it when "she spilled some drink on me / And now I'm knowin' she tipsy." My neighbor has this song as her ringtone.

Relevant Lyrics:

Blame it on the goose, gotcha feeling loose
Blame it on the 'tron, gotcha panties off
Blame it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol, blame it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol
Blame it on the vodka, blame it on the henny
Blame it on the blue tap got you feeling dizzy
Blame it on the ah-ah-ah-alcohol, blame it on the ah-ah ah-ah ah-al-co-hol

Why It's So Rapey: She doesn't want it until she's had such a serious combination of cocktails that she's spilling drinks on Jamie Foxx. Foxx, of course, knew better than she alllll alongggg.

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Date Rape Anthem: The Toadies' "Possum Kingdom," a first-person appeal to a future rape/murder victim to go with the Toadies' ultimate skeezy dude "behind the boathouse."

Relevant Lyrics:

Make up your mind
Decide to walk with me
Around the lake tonight
By my side
I'm not gonna lie
I'll not be a gentleman
Behind the boathouse
I'll show you my dark secret

Why It's So Rapey: More a date-murder anthem, the Toadies still suggest that she'll "Give it up to me, Give it up to me" before she becomes his "angel."

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Date Rape Anthem: Sublime's "Date Rape," a ska jaunt through a woman's acquaintance rape, her legal battle, and the rapist's punishment. Popular among Arizona middle school students.

Relevant Lyrics:

Thats when things got out of control.
She didnt want to, he had his way.
She said, lets go
He said, no way!
Come on babe its your lucky day.
Shut your mouth, were gonna do it my way.
Come on baby dont be afraid,
If it wasnt for date rape Id never get laid.

Why It's So Rapey: This date rape song has a positive moral ending: "It does not pay / Drunk and horny." But it then goes on to advocate for prison rape: "Well, I cant take pity on men of his kind," Sublime's Bradley Nowell sings. "Even though he now takes it in the behind."

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Date Rape Anthem: Frank Loesser's "Baby, It's Cold Outside," a tug-of-war duet between an unwilling female and a drink-mixing male. Penned in 1944, decades before the term "date rape" entered our collective consciousness.

Relevant Lyrics:

I really can't stay—Baby it's cold outside
I've got to go away—Baby it's cold outside
This evening has been
—Been hoping that you'd drop in
So very nice
I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice
My mother will start to worry
Beautiful, what's your hurry
My father will be pacing the floor
Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I'd better scurry
Beautiful, please don't hurry
well Maybe just a half a drink more
Put some music on while I pour

The neighbors might thinkBaby, it's bad out there
Say, what's in this drink
No cabs to be had out there
I wish I knew how
Your eyes are like starlight now
To break this spell
I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell
I ought to say no, no, no, sir
Mind if I move a little closer
At least I'm gonna say that I tried
What's the sense in hurting my pride
I really can't stay—Baby don't hold out
Ahh, but it's cold outside

Why It's So Rapey: Dubbed by Urban Dictionary as the "Christmas Date Rape Song," "Baby, It's Cold Outside" has endured as a classic date rape anthem because (a) it was ahead of its time; (b) the lyrics are unimaginably date-rapey—the woman tells the man her "answer is no," but he continues to ply her with drinks and exaggerated weather-based fears until she sleeps over; and (c) it's nevertheless celebrated as a Christmas classic.

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Date Rape Anthem: Anal Cunt's "You Were Too Ugly to Rape So I Beat the Shit Out of You," a song which claims to have lyrics.

Relevant Lyrics:

I drank a case of whiskey
And you looked like Jeanine Jizm
I drank another case of whiskey
And you looked like Roseannie Barr

Why It's So Rapey: Okay, I'm not sure "I drank a case of whiskey" qualifies as a date, and Anal Cunt does decide to "beat the shit" out of her instead of raping her, and I'm pretty sure they don't actually say anything in this song, but I think it still counts.

Comments

  1. #1

    ok so I don't believe that the Foxx song describes date rape. In fact I don't think it even comes close. If I got drunk, and start a fight with a sober guy it's not on him so long as he only acts in self defense. This girl gets drunk, and is flirting with these guys. She is talking about doing something she doesn't normally do (sex). She's not getting "date raped" she's making a poor decision while she's drunk. California may have some retarded law that basically says if the girl (and only the girl never the guy) is drunk then it's automatically date rape. That does not make it true. I've slept with women who were drunk when I was (moderately) sober, and the reverse has also occurred. Neither of these constituted rape in anyway. There are lots of grey areas as far as rape, and especially date rape are concerned, but "I don't usually do this but..." probably constitutes consent.

  2. #2

    This song is clearly laying out time-tested date rape tactics:

    (a) want to have sex with her
    (b) think you know better than she does and assert that she really wants YOU, too
    (c) serve up goose, tron, vodka, and henny until you two "agree"
    (d) assert that SHE is the only one who needs to find an excuse for her actions by "blaming" it on the alcohol (instead of you).

    Obviously, booze makes consent blurry. Advocating for / glamorizing bringing large amounts of alcohol into the situation in order to blur that consent is rapey.

  3. #3

    This is a brilliant blog post, because it is so very inflammatory. But it blurs the line between civil and criminal concerns, and makes an entertainment out of a serious issue.

    Date rape exists, in part, because of a perceived blurry line between consent, and assault. That line ain't really so blurry until people go around blurring it; for instance by asserting that something is 'rapey', meaning rape-like.

    As poetry, song lyrics are fodder for consideration of cultural attitudes. In regards to judging the content of any particular song, I lose confidence in your judgment when you blend in the whimsy so entertainingly.

  4. #4

    Listen, just because some dumb law calls something rape doesn't mean it's rape. It's clear the girl wanted to be rape- err, have sex and just needed a little goose to lower her silly female inhibitions. Similarly, if a girl is dressed provocatively it's okay to force- err, coerce her into sex, because obviously if she didn't want to she would have dressed conservatively, and thus consent is implied. I have had sex with a lot of drunk women and it was never rape because I do not call it rape. Furthermore, I don't trust your judgement on which songs are rapey, because you are a woman and women often times can't even distinguish as to whether or not they've been date raped (they haven't).

  5. #5

    flesh parade is such a better band than AC

  6. #6

    Ian, I'm really hoping you were mocking me. If not you may have, through sheer idiocy, made me change my position. My problem with this as an instance of date rape is they aren't talking about slipping her a pill, or forcing her to drink. She gets drunk. Being drunk does not allow you to abdicate your responsibilities. If I get drunk, and make a bad decision (start a fight, fall down and hurt myself etc.) it's not anyone else' fault. Rape is not the womans fault, but date rape as described in the song is at least half her fault. If she feels bad the next day because she got drunk and made a bad decision fuck her.

  7. #7

    Uh, can I have that song by anal cunt be my wedding song? It's sort of my dream.

  8. #8

    this is a weird quesition, but do you need the opinion of the person featured in something like foxx's opus to qualify it as rape? so, do you need an inbalance of power to be experienced by BOTH the raper and the victim? the narration is sort of his perception of the situation, which overall has this sort of 'i will conquer, you are powerless' kind of feel. so that's rapey on one part of the equation. but like does the girl also have to experience a sense of degradation or crappiness? like, r. kelly is kinda rapey, but then you see all these girls convinced that he is a god (partially through his music and then the media image that comes out of that) and would consensually sleep with him. basically, whose experience of the situation matters more when you are establishing whether something is rape? the perpetrator's or the victims? does it have to be both?

  9. #9

    Let's split some hairs, shall we?

    Hess is doing cultural criticism, waving her hands at what might be problematic in the above songs. She uses the neologism "rapey" to describe the aspects of these songs that trivialize rape itself or trivialize situations that place women at greater risk of rape - like pouring up mad henny in the club. It's an aesthetic/moral argument about these, uh, cultural artifacts.

    A related-but-separate question is what, exactly, constitutes "rape". The laws of our society usually say that rape is "sex without consent," and then they go on further to specify under what circumstances an individual can meaningfully be said to have given consent. For instance, our society has an age that an individual must obtain before they are legally allowed to give consent. Also, an individual must be conscious to give consent.

    Now, the amount of henny one must consume before losing consciousness will vary from person to person, and society may never be able to craft a perfect legal precedent to address that. But that very ambiguity makes it altogether appropriate for citizens to weigh in on the cultural narratives surrounding (situations that could lead to) rape. Indeed, if we hold feminist moral convictions, we are compelled to weigh in.

    As a man, if I think critically, it might slowly dawn on me that the seduction strategy of getting women fucked up on henny might not be such a good idea. I ought to deploy alternative strategies, like pretending that I am interested in what she is saying, or complimenting her hairdo.

  10. #10

    PS Toadies rule.

  11. #11

    seems like everyone forgot ATCQ's Date Rape off the Low End Theory album.

  12. #12

    Good call, dude. I'll write it up this afternoon.

  13. #13

    Hey Al, we're on the same wavelength, except that ATCQ's song says "date rape is bad," doesn't it?

  14. #14

    Wow, great, the first comment is from a total rape apologist and possible unrepentant rapist. Sweet. Mdesus, my misogynist friend, you bring up an interesting point with your analogy, except that it should have been exactly the opposite -- a better analogy would have been to ask whether it's acceptable for a sober person to punch someone in the face when they're drunk, knowing that they'll be less able to fight off an attacker, just as men like Foxx go after drunk women knowing those women will be less able to fight them off; maybe you live in Saudi Arabia or something, but where I live, it's not illegal to be raped. It is, however, illegal to punch someone in the face. It's absolutely disgusting that you had the gall to put rape victims in the same category as people who commit assault. Seriously, if you don't understand that being the perpetrator of a crime is different from being the victim of a crime something is seriously wrong with you.

    What I also don't understand about the rape apologists defending this song is that the word "blame" means assigning responsibility for something wrong or bad. So Foxx is essentially saying alcohol is responsible for something wrong -- in this case, luring an otherwise unwilling woman into what he thinks is sex but what most sane people understand is rape. I mean, really, if she's not willing to have sex with you without being totally hammered, getting her shitfaced isn't going to change whether you've gotten consent. Why would you want to keep trying if you know somebody's sober answer is no, anyhow? There's a reason why salespeople can't stand outside of bars waiting for drunk people to come out and make sales, and why researchers on studies can't have intoxicated patients sign consent forms. This doesn't mean that people who are in a relationship can't ever have drunk sex, but plying a stranger with alcohol to get them to do something they wouldn't do otherwise and so that they'll be less able to fight you off? Hell no. No way is that shit ever acceptable.

  15. #15

    (In my reverse analogy, I mean the person getting punched in the face is drunk, and the person punching them is sober -- just noticed that wasn't clear.)

  16. #16

    Also, Prince Paul's "Beautiful Night" off the inestimable Psychoanalysis, is pretty freakin' rapey.

  17. #17

    The Toadies are repeat offenders as well... they have a song called Tyler that fully outlines a stalker/rapist's nighttime jaunt into his obsession's home. I don't remember all the lyrics but I clearly recall, "I stumble in the hallway, outside her bedroom door/ I hear her call out to me, I hear the fear in her voice/ she pulls her covers tighter, I press against her door/ I will be with her tonight" it's the creepiest song but somehow it's still pretty awesome too...

  18. #18

    i am jeannine jizm he never hit or fucked me i'm to good lookin' for that.

  19. #19

    Jeannine Jizm and CLAUDIA are real women. I love them both!

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