The Sexist

An Open Letter to CVS “Sensitive Lady Products” Salespeople


Sensitive Man Products need not be locked behind glass doors

To the Employees of Several Washington-Area CVS Stores:

I understand that your CEO, Thomas Ryan, has stated that the CVS name stands for "Convenience, Value, and Service." This letter takes issue with the third.

It has recently come to my attention, upon purchasing Sensitive Lady Products at several Washington-area CVS stores, that the employees tasked with accepting my payment for these products have not received proper training in How to Not Act Like A Jerk to the Ladies Who Purchase Sensitive Lady Products.

I understand it may be difficult to know how to handle the sale of a Sensitive Lady Product. Perhaps you're afraid of offending a lady who may be sensitive about purchasing a Sensitive Lady Product; perhaps you have personal religious or political beliefs that require you to be sort of a jerk about doing your job. But you guys are Sensitive Lady Product sales professionals, and you should know how to properly conduct yourselves. Here are some tips.

How to Not Act Like A Jerk to Ladies Purchasing Sensitive Lady Products:

1. When your supervisor asks you to open the locked glass case that holds the Sensitive Lady Product I require, do not make small-talk speculating as to why I require it.

2. Don't suggest which one I should get, either. You're a dude.

3. On second thought, just don't lock up your Sensitive Lady Products.

4. Instead, try to consider why you might have needed to lock them up in the first place. Hmm, maybe it's because you're total jerks to the people who buy them?

5. When it comes time for me to exchange money for the Sensitive Lady Product, look me in the eye.

6. Respond when I say "thank you."

7. If you really cannot acknowledge that I am a human, at least ask if I have a CVS card! I can use some savings on these Sensitive Lady Products!

Sincerely,

A purchaser of Sensitive Lady Products.

  • http://filthygrandeur.blogspot.com FilthyGrandeur

    wow. that's so fucking ridiculous. it's none of their damn business why you require any product, and it's certainly not their place to make suggestions about products or pass judgment on you, the customer. that's a nice side of shame and douchebaggery you got with your product. i hate cvs.

  • http://blonderthanyou.wordpress.com suicide_blond

    seeee..i told everyone in college..THIS is exactly the type of situation that calls for "room mates from New Jersey"!!! southerners + sensitive lady products + CVS employee = disaster BUT if you simply add Jersey Girl to the equation...well.. whew... Chaos ensues!
    xoxo

  • Jaime Oswaldo Grande

    "Sensitive Man Products need not be locked behind glass doors"

    It took years of lobbying to get them under "power wing" instead of under lock and key. Which I suppose is a lower hurdle but, still ridiculous considering DC's HIV rate.

  • http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist Amanda Hess

    Jamie, totally. And condoms are still locked up in some District CVS stores. Save Lives Free the Condoms bravely documents CVS' fucked up contraception access here:

    http://savelivesfreethecondoms.blogspot.com/

    At the store I went to, the condoms were in the "vending machine" style and the Sensitive Lady Product I required was locked up. We can't stop at condoms.

  • Labyrinth

    The Sexist has outdone itself with this article. I am horrified that SLPs (sensitive lady products) are locked up so that one has to face additional humiliation to purchase them. This seems downright degrading and punitive. As for stores that lock up condoms--you have got to bloody be kidding me. Any barrier to buy condoms may discourage those who need them the most, like teenagers. If it was up to me, free condoms would be in every public bathroom, and high school bathroom, by the bucketfuls. When are we going to move into the 21st century??? AIDS and STD prevention needs to trump Puritanical and sexist attitudes in order for any real public health changes to work.

    Thank you for writing this article. I fully plan to give CVS, who has gotten a lot of my business over the years, a piece of my mind.

  • http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist Amanda Hess

    I like thinking of the Sexist as an "It."

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  • http://twice-immigrant.livejournal.com Shaker Caitiecat

    OMG. That's...what freaking century is your country living in, anyway?

    Up here in Soviet Canuckistan, the SLPs are where they belong: on the shelves with everything else. How sad that we are not so free and liberty-loving as our neighbours to the south. o.O

  • Elyse

    I had one woman at the CVS register ask me if I liked the product I was buying! She then asked if I would recommend it to someone else! It was pretty awkward!!!

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  • http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist Amanda Hess

    Elyse, ugh. At least she acknowledged you ... I guess.

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  • yup yup

    Don't forget Bed Bath & Behind: when you want a jumbo condom pack from locked cases (pretty cheap with 20% off coupon) they chat it up on their walkie-talkies. Volume up full blast: "Somebody wants condoms" "I need a key for CONDOMS!"... Wonder why I started buying on Amazon?

  • Nate

    If people didn't steal it, it wouldn't be locked up. With each box being 10-15$, grabbing 5 and bolting is an easy 25$ after you sell it to some bodega. It's pretty obvious. Teach people not to steal and SLP become unlcoked

  • http://tanglewood.blogspot.com kari

    Ugh. Buying the Sensitive Lady's Morning-After Pill from CVS has been an even worse and hostile experience for me and other ladies whom I know.

  • kari

    Oops, I just linked to the wrong website as my personal website in comment 12. Copy-paste faux pas!

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