The Sexist

Saws In Vaginas: Dangerous

Putting a saw in your vagina is very dangerous, even if you put a rubber dildo over that saw prior to putting the saw into your vagina. A Southern Maryland couple learned that the hard way over the weekend when a man put a saw in a dildo into a woman's vagina, only to have the saw cut through the dildo and then, inevitably, through the woman.

In a call to 911, the man explained that "he had placed a sex toy over a saber saw blade, and then used the power tool on his partner, but the blade cut through the plastic and injured the woman." The 27-year-old victim, "injured and bleeding," was " flown to Prince George’s hospital center by Maryland State Police."

Now, normally I would say to you: Saws! They are for cutting. Don't be surprised if they cut through things, such as your genitalia, or your rubber thing molded to approximate genitalia. However, if you do want to stick a saw in there, you'd do well to invest in the FuckSall Fucking Adapter (pictured), a $98 gizmo that can be used "alone if you like raw metal," or "with the Doc Johnson 8 inch vacu lock penis for a more realistic fuck." The adapter "works on most Sawzall's or that type of reciprocating saws" (like this one, available on Amazon from $79.99).

That's a $177.99 investment to harness the natural power of a saw (hurting) and bring it into your sex life (pleasure). It's a steal, really.

Photo via eXtreme Restraints

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