The Sexist

Innuendo-Off: The Papers On Flynt, Francis And the Porn Industry Bailout

Smut magnates Larry Flynt and Joe Francis want Congress to bail them out with a $5 billion stimulus package for the porn industry— a story destined to be slapped with a silly headline and hastily aggregated by all major news outlets! So which media co.'s throw-away one-liner best exploits this sham news story's opportunity for sexual innuendo? here's mine: Blow job! I've ranked the rest here, from worst to best!

WORST: Washington City Paper's The Sexist: "Blow job!"

UGH: Creative Loafing: "I’m all for it. Because like it or not, all tax payers watch porn. Think about it, how can so many people protest it if they have never seen it?"

AWFUL: CNN's Campbell Brown: "I have to mention tonight the headline that caught my eye on the CNN Ticker earlier today: 'Porn Industry Seeks Federal Bailout.' Yeah, you heard me. The porn industry wants a bailout."

STILL PRETTY BAD: MSNBC: "So get ready to party, wild girls. Francis plans to bring the request to D.C. in person."

GOOD TRY: TMZ: "Joe Francis and Larry Flynt claim the economy has made America's sexual appetite go limp, so they're going to the one place where sex is always rampant—Congress.

TEE HEE—USE OF "GROW" POSSIBLY UNINTENTIONAL: CNN Political Ticker: "Flynt and Francis concede the industry itself is in no financial danger — DVD sales have slipped over the past year, but Web traffic has continued to grow."

WINNER! Philadelphia City Paper: "Hustler Magazine publisher Larry Flynt and Joe Francis, the man who singlehandedly (sorry about that) revived cinéma vérité with his series of Girls Gone Wild documentaries, have written to congressmen Henry Waxman and Barney Frank (who oversees the House's Financial Services Committee) asking for a $5 billion bailout of the porn industry. . . . Rejected title: People No Longer As Interested in Hummers." Bonus: posted by "Rodney Anonymous"

Photo by anarchosyn

  • Darrow Montgomery

    "Innuendo" is Innuendo enough.

  • http://www.rodneyanonymous.com Rodney Anonymous

    Where do i pick up my prize?

  • http://phillybits.blogspot.com Phillybits

    Lol.

  • http://www.washingtoncitypaper.com/blogs/sexist Amanda Hess

    RODNEY ANODNEYMOUS!!

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