Man Madness: Brookings Institution Vs. Georgetown University
The thinky portion of the Manliest Workplace in D.C. tournament continues today as Brookings challenges Georgetown for intellectual man dominance (See the full 64-workplace bracket here). So put on your thinking caps, four-eyes, and lets get to the competition!
BROOKINGS INSTITUTION: This D.C. think tank aims to “Strengthen American democracy, foster the economic and social welfare, security and opportunity of all Americans and secure a more open, safe, prosperous and cooperative international system.” But what is its position on strengthening and fostering our nation’s shrinking reserve of Manliness?
President Strobe Talbott (Male, 15 points*)
Chairman of the Board John L. Thornton (Male, 9 points)
Managing Director William Antholis (Male, 8 points)
VP, Dir. of Econ. and Devel. Lael Brainard (Female, ZERO)
VP, Dir. of Brookings Press Robert L. Faherty (Male, 6 points)
VP, Dir. of Econ. Studies William Gale (Male, 5 points)
VP, Dir. of Met. Policy Bruce Katz (Male, 4 points)
VP, Dir. of Foreign Policy Studies Carlos Pascual (Male, 3 points)
Treasurer and VP Frederick L. Silbernagel III (Male, 2 points)
VP for Comm. Melissa Skolfield (Female, ZERO)
* Extra point administered to all named “Strobe”
The Brookings Institution may not have a chance at competing with such perfectly scored institutions as the U.S. Senate and the Teamsters (thanks, Lael and Melissa). But I’m feeling saucy today, so I went ahead and administered an extra few point to Brookings’ president, whose name alone is a flashing beacon of manliness in a nation compromised by womanhood. Strobe brings Brookings’ manly total to 52 of 55 points.
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GEORGETOWN UNIVERSITY: Though the mascot of D.C.’s most prestigious university, the Hoya (or “What”), reeks of namby-pamby intellectualism, its unofficial representative, the Bulldog (or “Mean, Scrappy Animal”) restores the institution’s manliness.
President John J. DeGioia (Male, 10 points)
Provost James J. O’Donnell (Male, 9 points)
Interim Dean, G’town College Chester L. Gillis (Male, 8 points)
Dean, Grad. School Timothy A. Barbari (Male, 7 points)
Dean, Walsh School Robert L. Gallucci (Male, 6 points)
Dean, McDonough School George G. Daly (Male, 5 points)
Dean, School of Contin. Studies Robert L. Manuel (Male, 4 points)
Dean of Students Todd A. Olson (Male, 3 points)
Director of Athletics Bernard M. Muir (Male, 2 points)
Office of Int’l Prog. Dir. Katherine Bellows (Female, ZERO)
Even devoid of a single Strobe, Georgetown registers a very strong showing of 54 out of a possible 55 points on the manly index. Brookings—pwned! Tune in tomorrow when we wrap up the smarts bracket as the Center of American Progress takes on American University.
Photo by NCinDC.
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10:44 am
Those are some manly ass places. Also the cafeteria at the Brookings Institute is outstanding. I mean simply delicious.
11:44 am
Shoddy research…You forgot the Managing Director, William Antholis.
11:45 am
MD of Brookings, that is.
RECOUNT, RECOUNT, RECOUNT!
12:23 pm
Antholis is on there!
12:49 pm
It is a well-known fact among the Washington political sub-elite that William “aka The Billy” Antholis was far ahead of his time in introducing the goatee (or more accurately, the Van Dyke) into recent popular American male culture. In the early to mid-80’s, when he still had hair, amidst the taunts of his peers, this swarthy Greek was sporting this ground-breaking look while others were wearing the latest version of parachute pants. Unfortunately, Antholis’ bold statement seems to have been obscured by the fact that since those early days, he has lost all of his cranial hair, thereby seemingly lumping him into the vast swaths of male-dom who attempted to offset their baldness with this now passe facial styling. To do so would be a grevious mistake, and would ignore the tuff stance Antholis once took.
William “The Billy” Antholis is deserving of at least an additional 3 points.
1:59 pm
Granted.