man madness

Man Madness: Fire Department Vs. D.C. Police

Posted by Amanda Hess on Nov. 13, 2008, at 8:49 am

La la la, the contest continues, see the full 64-workplace bracket here, D.C. government I’ve got my eye on you this week, all right are you ready let’s go show me your men!

FIRE DEPARTMENT: Nothin’ manlier than emptying your hose on some hot property, am I right ladies? OR AM I WRONG:

Fire Chief Dennis L. Rubin (Male, 10 points)
Assistant Fire Chief Alfred Jeffery (Male, 9 points)
Assistant Fire Chief Lawrence Schultz (Male, 8 points)
Assistant Fire Chief Brian Lee (Male, 7 points)
Assistant Fire Chief Michael Williams, MD (Male, 6 points)
Assistant Fire Chief Rafael Sa’adah (Male, 5 points)
Agency Fiscal Officer Shelly Robinson-Smith (Female, ZERO)
General Counsel Marceline D. Alexander (Female, ZERO)
Chief of Staff Amy Ward (Female, ZERO)
Hydrant Inspection Coordinator Sean Egan (Male, 1 point)

Nope. I was right. With 46 out of 55 manly points, the Fire and Emergency Medical Services staff proves only slightly less manly than the fireman stereotype. But how will it fare against the District’s lawmen and lawymmin?

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METROPOLITAN POLICE DEPARTMENT:

Police Chief Cathy Lanier (Female, ZERO)
Assistant Chief Alfred Durham (Male, 9 points)
Assistant Chief Diane Groomes (Female, ZERO)
Assistant Chief Patrick Burke (Male, 7 points)
Assistant Chief Joshua Ederheimer (Male, 6 points)
Corporate Support Bureau Head Edward Hamilton (Male, 5 points)
Assistant Chief Winston Robinson (Male, 4 points)
Assistant Chief Peter Newsham (Male, 3 points)
General Counsel Terrence Ryan (Male, 2 points)
Agency Fiscal Officer Martin Carmody (Male, 1 point)

Book ‘em, officer! With 37 out of 55 manly points, or 67 percent manliness, the D.C. police department’s girls and boys in blue should receive their Miranda warning—because Miranda is such a feminine name! Looks like Fire and Emergency Medical Services out-mans MPD handily. Tune in tomorrow when the D.C. government bracket wraps up—with the D.C. Council and the Department of Corrections!

Firemen by FredoAlvarez; MPD photo by Andrew Feinberg