Help Michael Brown Pay Off His Tax Debts
So it turns out that Councilmember Michael A. Brown has some unpaid tax debts. As a public service, LL is trying to put together some sharp ideas for the councilmember to help pay those pesky bills. After some pretty heated brainstorming with with City Paper's Jason Cherkis, we've only been able to come up with a few ideas:
- Sell the naming rights to "Michael A. Brown." Metro is considering selling the naming rights to its stations, and we all know "Michael Brown" is a desirable name.
- Rent out your council office to Councilmember Sekou Biddle. LL recently saw Biddle putting his yogurt in CM Tommy Wells' office refridgerator because Biddle doesn't have a fridge of his own. Brown's got a pretty nice office that he could probably get some nice coin out of Biddle for.
- Run for mayor. Sure, legally you'd have to quit your fancy second job as a lobbyist, but there's got to be other ways to supplement the mayor's $200,000-a-year salary, which is $80,000 more than what you make as a councilmember.
- Sell the naming rights to Pennsylvania Avenue. You've already working on changing the name; why not make some cash at the same time?
- Charge for basketball lessons.
Have any other suggestions for Brown? Leave them in the comments.
Photo by Darrow Montgomery
2:18 pm
Sell off his ridiculous Hummer.
Sell ad space on his bald head.
Charge lobbyists for renting him as their mouthpiece and legislation-introducer.
Claim it's really White Mike's tax bills and OTR is getting the two of them confused.
2:27 pm
sometimes people send their kids to public school.
2:39 pm
Surely in the current climate bannering must be on the forecast. Heres how it works. Grab your craziest neighbor and convince them to join you in setting up some kind of phoney district,"Places from Which You Can see the Douglas Development Sign" for instance. Announce a branding exercise for said district based on "banners" an idea last original in 1979. Find some good natured council staff person you can bamboozle with a dog and pony show to convince some hapless ward council person to slough off some outrageous amount of cash into an unregulated slush fund. Take the dog and pony show briefly on the road to utterly confuse the public as to what will be the actual result of this "branding" exercise. Make sure to appoint yourselves judge and jury and to inflict greivous harm on pre-existing professional and civic organizations.
Rework a lot of old, jumbled, garish graphics to somehow look like actual creative input has been expended on the whole hot mess. Spell Check is optional. Co-opt free of charge local venues to hold public meetings to cover the fact that in the end you will use the same tired .... and to update the public on when to expect the "banners". Sub-contract some out of District firm to produce and install said banners on the cheap ($300.00 might be reasonable on the upside). Put up a Christams Tree. Bill out the actual cost of the banners plus "consultant" fees to the tune of $1515.00 per banner. Announce that in the spirit of public service you are going to run for Council...on the pro business(Virginia business to be exact)platform!
2:45 pm
Both of the DC Council Browns--Kwame and Michael--should sign up with Washington Post's Michelle Singletary and publicly commit to addressing their financial woes.
Ms Singletary would provide regular updates via her "Color of Money" column. I think that many DC residents would benefit from watching their elected representatives go through Ms Singletary's battle-tested finance bootcamp.
I challenge the CMs to step to the plate and do some good for DC residents.
2:58 pm
It is amazing that the same elected officials who want to raise other taxpayers taxes don't pay their own bills. In this case it's a Brown thing at the DC City Council.
3:12 pm
Impound his credit/debit cards, check book, and ATM card.
Garnish 35% of his city council salary and a comparable percentage of ALL outside earnings/fees.
Make him wear a one city dunce cap until he's paid in full.
Implement similar steps for all DC elected officials, paid staffers, and lobbyists who don't pay bills, eg, Thomas, K. Brown, Barry, Charles, Wilmot . . . .
3:16 pm
Sad and pathetic.
Hardly a legacy his Pops would have been proud of...
4:27 pm
You forgot a big pay-off possibility: Open a group home for a vulnerable population. Pay self lavish salary while residents' basic needs go unmet.
4:33 pm
i am a lifelong resident,and i must say.we the people of D C are the biggest fools in the whole nation. look at this elected body that we have leading us. we should be ashame.just 1 example,we lead the nation in spending per student,and what do we get 4 i'll money. the worst schools in the nation. u can take that over 2 health services,youth services,mental health,HIV,unemployment,i can go on and on but i wont. back 2 m. brown,this fool want 2 change the block he work on,13th 2 14thst signs 4 what. do anybody know who this man is. we know one thing that this fool dont know how 2 live on a $400.000. salery. SHAME ON US...
4:33 pm
Obviously, get the Marion Barry show picked up for syndication, and live off the remainder checks.
6:33 pm
Private citizen Lawsuit is recomended because on the election application he must have written..'Owes no back taxes'...to be eligeble to run??
8:06 pm
Forget banners, they are so passe. I say kiosks are the next hot thing. If you can get 12 hundred in consultancy fees to put up a banner a kiosk must be worth 2 grand.
8:06 pm
Of course the ultimate branding device in DC would be the hot air balloon!
8:57 am
Why do voters continue to vote for politicians like both Kwame and Michael Brown with personal financial problems? I can't remember the former Senator or Congressman that was offered a cabinet position if someone's administration and he owed back taxes.
11:49 am
Michael Brown stills owes the Miller Copying Services for misleading them as an non-existing attorney, and robbing them our of ten thousand ($10K) dollars, as they soughted his so-called representation to obtain a site in the Washington Convention Center that he ended up securing for himself.
People, understand why Gray, KBrown, HThomas and finally MBarry joined the team to support this OJT Councilmember. It's simple, and that to control a buddy system that has been working to their advantage thus far.
The reason becomes how long can they sustain this tie or professional and personal relations.
More facts, how's his home with wifey, who has opted to leave twice. I wonder why, what people would pay to know more.
11:53 pm
New DC license plate "tag line":
REPRESENTATION WITHOUT TAXATION !!