Archive for November, 2007

Show No. 24: Exeter, England

Overheard at a venue in Exeter, England:
Me: Thanks for the show tonight.
Exeter Promoter (EP): Thank you. It was a pleasure.
Me: No, it was our pleasure.
EP: No, it was our pleasure.
Me: No, really, it was our pleasure.
EP: Okay, then. (A moment passes.)
Me: Well. How's Exeter?
EP: Well. (A moment passes.) Exeter is strange. There was a university [...]

Show No. 23: Birmingham, England

Dear BBC representative,
I am writing to congratulate you on your network's decision to air Cinderella Liberty (1973) starring James Caan at approximately 2 a.m. this past Saturday night. As you must be aware, I am a James Caan enthusiast, and was pleasantly surprised to find one of Mr. Caan's overlooked works on British public television [...]

Show No. 22: Brighton, England

To Whom It May Concern:
I understand that you are an American musician touring England on a tight budget and, in pursuit of financial solvency and/or personal adventure, may forego an expensive hotel room to spend a night in your freezing van. Drawing on rich personal experience, I write to provide my thoughts on [...]

Show No. 21: Lille, France

Overheard outside concert venue in Lille, France:
French Promoter (FP): I'm sorry about the show tonight.
Me: Don't be sorry. I'm the one that is sorry.
FP: You should have been able to play a full set.
Me: It's all right. We played for four minutes. Four minutes of any band is enough. The audience gets the basic idea [...]

Show No. 20: Dortmund, Germany

"Your kitchen, though modest, is well-designed," I confided to the promoter of my show in Dortmund, Germany. We sat in his kitchen, savoring cups of Pfefferminz tee, a.k.a. "peppermint tea."
"The landlord has just built it," the promoter declared. I inuited that he was unenthusiastic about his modest, well-designed kitchen. I traced this lack of enthusiasm [...]

Show No. 19: Hamburg, Germany

"We played with an American band last night," I informed my bandmate. We were walking around Hamburg, searching for a bookstore that might stock books written in English, our native tongue.
"Yes," my bandmate replied.
"This was the first American band that we have played with in Europe," I continued. "And [...]