Yearning to Itch What Waitresses Will Do For Tips
Warehouse Arts – Beyond

Remaining Performances:
Saturday, July 12 @ 1:00 PM (Warehouse Beyond)
Sunday, July 13 @ 6:00 PM (Warehouse Beyond)
Thursday, July 17 @ 9:30 PM (Warehouse Beyond)
Saturday, July 19 @ 5:00 PM (Warehouse Beyond)
Sunday, July 26 @ 7:00 PM (Warehouse Beyond)

They say: “It’s about unrequited lust and inappropriate behavior. Death, love and lucid dreaming. About trying to seduce the wrong people in the wrong way for the right and wrong reasons. It’s about customer service, nightmares and the present moment. 4 women, 1 man.”

Brian’s take: There I was, sitting innocently in my second row seat, jotting down a note or two in my steno pad, when all of a sudden one of the waitresses in Yearning to Itch… hurled a Twinkie at me for no apparent reason at all.

Well, maybe there was a reason.  Maybe she could tell that the notes I was jotting were unflattering.  Maybe she could intuit that I was copying down the lines she was speaking with very large and confused question marks scribbled next to them.  Maybe she was pissed at me about the fact that I just didn’t get it.

Which would make sense–if a reviewer writes negative things about you, why not throw a spongy, cream-filled delicacy at him?  That would be a motivated action, which would make that Twinkie moment the most coherent in this entire play–a (luckily) 35-minute dream sequence in the style of post-inferno Strindberg if Strindberg lacked any kind of style.  The characters insert the word “lucid” before dream, but there is very little lucidity to be found amidst the platitudes, awkward gestures, and downright nonsense that riddle this piece.  Sure, there are a few funny moments and lines here or there–maybe 5 or so.  Otherwise, I just left confused, befuddled, perplexed, and covered in bits of Twinkie dust.

See it if: You find yourself captivated by one-line musings about the very play you are watching.

Skip it if: You’re near a couch and have the chance to take a 35 minute catnap–your own dream will probably be more rewarding and less expensive.

All right, that’s it for me folks.  I’m about to go see a little something called Yearning to Itch: What Waitresses Will Do For Tips.  We’ve also got our army of guest reviewers, as well as Trey Graham, Glen Weldon, and Ted Scheinman out there watching and writing all over town.  So check in at all hours to for updates on what’s worth seeing and what’s worth skipping.  

And if you’re bored in the meantime (and for some unacceptable reason you’re not out seeing a show), check out another Post piece on DC Fringe, this one by Ellen McCarthy.

The phone’s ringing again, but now no one is here to answer it.