Tony Kornheiser's acting like a bad guy with a dark heart again. Earlier this week, he went after Mike Wise on Dan Snyder's sportstalker, WTEM, spending much of his show ranting about a week-old column from Wise for no obvious reason. Kornheiser mocked Wise for wondering if the Redskins would win another game this season before the Denver game. Kornheiser behaved as if Wise had called Dewey over Truman. There was nothing funny about Kornheiser's rants. (The Great Dan Steinberg Steinographs the unfunny hate here.)

Kornheiser, of course, really didn't give a rip about Wise's column. He just wanted to rip Wise.

Full disclosure: I think Kornheiser's a bad guy with a dark heart.

'Course, I only met him once, for about 10 minutes about 10 years ago at a Washington Post holiday party. It's one of my favorite party stories, right up there with having Alan Greenspan wonder if he'd shown up at the wrong event after encountering me and my thrift-store wardrobe at a book party, and getting attacked by Buddy Holly's shop teacher during a night out in Lubbock.

Tell the Kornheiser-and-me one again? Sure!

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Tony Kornheiser, Mike Wise, and Me?" »

As if vending beside urinals at Redskins games wasn't viral enough: Jennifer Donelan of WJLA put BeerInTheBathroomsGate™ on her station's evening news, and even took a few seconds to give Washington City Paper kudos for blowing the lid off Snyder's newest revenue stream.

Here's Donelan's WJLA piece. Wait til the 50-second mark. Don't take a pee break or beer break or both, or you'll miss my work. And remember: TV puts on 10 pounds, and I've been watching a lot of TV lately.

Otherwise, I think I nailed my line. Thinking ahead: "I'd like to thank-thank...both my readers-readers...and the Academy-Academy..."

Reading between the lines of Donelan's copy, it looks like the Redskins fired the beer man caught on tape dispensing beer in an environment teeming with second-hand poop. A commenter on City Desk yesterday wrote that he was a vendor at FedExField, and he found the bathroom vending "disgusting." But he warned Redskins patrons who are "worried about sanitation" that they should really "stay far away from the lemonade."

Yucky!

***

Sticking with local media, via DCRTV: Two more guys fired by Dan Snyder will have a radio show to bash their former boss. WTOP will give John Riggins and Frank Herzog at least a tryout for a weekly show called "Ask Riggo." (The first installment of Riggins/Herzog is going off the air as we type. "We should do this again," Riggins said to Herzog at sign-off.)

(AFTER THE JUMP: Does everybody who despises Dan Snyder get a radio show? Will Laveranues Coles get a program? Timmy Smith's out of jail? Dan Snyder benched Jason Campbell? Jeff George who? Dan Snyder will put Jason Campbell back on the field Monday night?  Night of Quarterbacks what?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: WJLA Makes BeerInTheBathroomsGate™ Even More Viral?" »

David Alprin had his anti-Dan Snyder artwork, or whatever you want to call the above paper plate thingee, confiscated at the gates of FedExField two weeks ago.

Alprin's a longtime Skins season ticketholder and was one of many fans who wanted to make a statement about the state of the franchise.

He'd stayed up late the night before the Tampa Bay game crafting dozens and dozens of his statement-makers. But then Snyder's jack-booted thugs, in the form of the yellow-jacketed FedExField security staff, threw Alprin's civil-disobedient plates in the garbage before letting him in the stadium.

But while Snyder killed the message, he didn't kill the messenger. And Alprin's going back for more of the same this weekend.

"I'm thinking about going stealth and bringing in pens, markers, etc.,  and making signs in the stadium either on paper we bring or the back of the drink caddies," he says.

He won't be alone.

More on the Prague Spring of Redskins fans to come.

***

(AFTER THE JUMP: Another installment of BogusHogetteGate? Really? Michelle Rhee thinks she's god? Really? Coat-tailing on Mike DeBonis' genius? Really? Melanie Oudin's coming to town with her mom, dad AND coach? Really? Snyder comes out on top in something? No way! Way?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Will Prague Spring for Redskins Fans Survive Snyder’s Jack-Booted Thugs?" »

Another day, another update on Dan Snyder's Cheerleader Car Wash Sweepstakes. Another chance to run that fab/yucky photo from Snyder's WTEM promotion, the one that's sucked in some of the most brilliant minds in new media to our humble comments section.

Seems Snyder doesn't really care who he jumps in bed with these days. His partner in the contest, which forces Redskins cheerleaders to put down their pom poms and pick up sponges and go service his radio station's 25-54 year old male demo, was a sponge company called SpongeTech Delivery Systems, Inc.

Well, just as the cheerleader pride giveaway was heating up, Snyder's ally gets nailed for all sorts of alleged shadiness by federal regulators: The Securities and Exchange Commission suspended trading on SpongeTech stock this week because of sketchy reports and non-filings of required documents.

(AFTER THE JUMP: SpongeTech's the Six Flags of the sudsy set? SpongeTech's so messed up it makes Snyder look like a fab businessman? Are Redskins cheerleaders being punished? Is WJFK punishing WTEM in the ratings? Can Mike Wise punish Tony Kornheiser? Is Anacostia/Eastern the Good Counsel/DeMatha of crumminess?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Could Car Wash Contest Be Snyder Punishing Redskins Cheerleaders for Promoting Rival WJFK?" »

Out: Book Burning

In: Bag Banning

The Great Dan Steinberg™'s write-up of the ill-will in the grandstands had great photos of the ill-willed.

Well, Steinberg's Bog post had great photos when it was originally posted, anyway.

As several commenters pointed out, those photos of folks with anti-Snyder t-shirts and paperwork are now gone. Just vanished.

Who removed them? Why were they removed?

Steinberg wouldn't tell me what happened. Questions were directed to his bosses at the Post's sports section.

Uh oh.

The mind races. Everybody knows by now that the Washington Post ain't one of Dan Snyder's favorite organs.

But would Snyder really try to censor photos of the same bags that he tried to censor for Sunday's game? I mean, Snyder's pulled some stuff before, for sure, but if he's behind Steinberg's photo removal, that would have to rank among the Skins owner's most Douchewellian™ moves of all time.

I've got messages into the Washington Post's* sports editors and the Redskins. Stay tuned to Cheap Seats Daily for continued coverage of PhotoGate™!

(AFTER THE JUMP: More tales of anti-bagging from FedExField? "Agent Zero" is the focus of WJFK's ad campaign? Is "Agent Zero" the most penetrating nickname in Washington sports history? And it came from a City Paper guy? Guaranteed Win Night™ and R²D²™ in the same post? Should I really bet the mortgage and then some on the Twins?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Would Dan Snyder Censor Dan Steinberg’s Photos of Censored Bags?" »

Dan Snyder's detestability rating enjoyed another spike yesterday: Reports out of FedExField for the Tampa Bay game have Snyder confiscating paper bags at the entrance to his stadium, so fans couldn't put them on their heads for the TV cameras.

Sportstalk radio station WJFK this morning put on callers who said they got bags past the gate but anybody who tried wearing one got swarmed by stadium security.

Paper bags! That's where that Sept. 11 fee Snyder tacks on to your ticket price goes? Sheeesh.

The bag gimmick is old, but funny. The ban is just creepy.

***

Death knell for Jason Campbell: Sonny Jurgensen has seen enough.

Unlike other members of the Skins broadcast crew, Jurgensen never talks without thinking about what he's going to say. And after Campbell's second interception, Jurgensen, who along with being the color commentator is a pal of Dan Snyder, said he'd seen enough. "I think it's time to warm up #16 guys," Sonny said.

(AFTER THE BREAK: Vinny and Larry get the Great Steinographer treatment? Vinny's going to bring Sally Jenkins on his radio show? Vinny's going to send Sally Jenkins his Super Bowl ring? Vinny's got a Super Bowl ring? Dan Snyder won't tell you how much your Johnny Rockets burger is? The Redskins schedule only winless teams? Brett Haber thinks the Redskins are sleeping giants? Biggest high school football game of all-time this week? Worst high school football season of all-time is imminent?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: The Johnny Rockets Menu Proves Dan Snyder Is Priceless?" »

Has Dan Snyder figured out how to hold events at FedExField?

Well, special correspondent J.P. Szymkowicz says that while he can't vouch for everybody, his U2 experience was uneventful, other than the show itself.

Szymkowicz says he left DC via Metro at 3 p.m. yesterday and arrived at the Morgan Boulevard station quickly and without any problems. He went into the stadium at 5 p.m. when the gates opened and with his general admission tickets got to the spot on the field that he desired. He got a ride home and found that the drive took "30 minutes from the stadium to the Rte. 50 exit," which is acceptable.

Szymkowicz, an expert on Snyder's parking methods and U2's discography, left so early because he feared the crowd would be too much for the stadium operators to handle.

The show, he says, "was great," and featured a sound system "as good as any of the other shows I have seen dating back to Unforgettable Fire."

Any other travel tales from u2 goers?

***

The Great Dan Steinberg mulls an issue that will likely get more timely as the 2009 season wears on: What do you do if you're mad at the Redskins, but get offered free tickets?

(AFTER THE JUMP: Paper or plastic for Sunday at FedExfield? DC football recruiting star in trouble? DC basketball recruiting star in trouble? Maryland hoops recruit in trouble? Stubblefield 2.0 in domestic and non-domestic legal and financial trouble? Sean Taylor's survivors in some money trouble?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Will Fanimosity Rear Its Covered Head at FedExField This Weekend?" »

How over are the Redskins?

So over that on WRC, Lindsay Czarniak did her sports report Sunday night without ANY visible Skins logos on her person. (Fact.)

So over that Sonny Jurgensen didn't tussle with Jim Zorn in his postgame interview. (Fact.)

So over that starting this week, the Virginia Lottery has changed first prize for its $20 Redskins scratch tickets to two (2) Redskins season tickets, and second prize to four (4) Redskins season tickets. (Fiction!)

Butt seriously:  What kind of buffoon is going to pay $20, the most heinous sum in the history of lotteries, for a chance to win Skins season tickets that pretty soon won't be worth $20? Commercials for the scratch tickets ran throughout the Redskins radio broadcast yesterday, and the uglier the game got, the more absurd the prizes  seemed. Who wants ANYTHING associated with the Redskins right now?

Coming soon to a courthouse near you: Dan Snyder sues lottery winners who turn down their Skins season tickets. (Fiction.)

But, good god, are the 2009 Skins over. (Fact.)

(AFTER THE JUMP: Skins' suckage is the lead local story? The national newspeople take break into Tiger Woods coverage to dump on the Skins? Jurgensen takes it easy on Zorn? Sam Huff can't stomach Albert Haynesworth? Will Haynesworth make everybody forget Dana Stubblefield? Bad news is good news for extremeskins.com? Who is this "Synder" fella? Nats get swept again? The Nats Tragic Number is down to what? It's hockey season?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Who the Hell Would Buy a Redskins Scratch Ticket Now?" »

Even in the NFL, employees take their cue from the boss. So all the Redskins are feeling persecuted these days.

"Our media have been our harshest critics," whined Mike Sellers during his media session yesterday.

He's the fullback who dropped what would have been a touchdown pass from Jason Campbell in Sunday's game with the Rams.

Sellers' comments, which were aired repeatedly on WTEM-AM, Snyder's sportstalk station, and rival WJFK-FM, also included a rant about how one of his Redskins coaches told the players that reporters in other towns where he'd coached were much better cheerleaders than DC's.

"Instead of boosting you," Sellers said of local scribes, "they kind of tear you down."

If you make a touchdown catch, Mike, I bet even some folks around here will write that you made a touchdown catch.

(AFTER THE JUMP: Now Cooley's whining, too? Portis admits a day at FedExField is money well wasted? Should Olie Kolzig have waited until NHL training camps opened before retiring? What? NHL training camps are open? Have you spent your Guaranteed Win Night winnings yet? Adam Dunn and Ryan Zimmerman, the sluggingest sluggers in DC baseball history? So it's the pitching?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Portis Wants You to Get Your $700 Worth?" »

There's trouble in maroon-and-black-and-yellow land. The mood is so toxic that even a nice plea to help out Chief Zee, the headdress-wearing longtime unofficial mascot of the Redskins and among the nicest, naivest, old-school mega-racists you'd ever meet, turned real ugly real fast.

Somebody posted a notice on Dan Snyder's message board, Extremeskins, alerting fans that a fundraiser will be thrown in Arlington next week to help pay medical bills for Chief Zee (real name Zema Williams).

Time was, such a post in these friendly confines would elicit nothing more controversial than "How much does he need?" But these days, even wins are booed. So the thread immediately disintegrated into an interrogation of the original poster, with some folks wondering why Williams needs another fundraiser---"He can afford season tickets, but not medical bills?" huffed the poster brianm23---and others asking why give money to a guy Chief Zee's age, since he should have all his health care covered by those socialist programs, Medicare and Medicaid.

(AFTER THE JUMP: That blogger called Chief Zee WHAT? Would Justice Scalia cringe at Chief Zee's costume? WJFK's crushing WTEM? It's a good time to unaffiliated with Dan Snyder? The last Guaranteed Win Night of 2009?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Could Chief Zee Sway Supreme Court Case?" »

Today's Washington Post has a special pro football insert headlined "NFL '09."

The most interesting reading in the 14-page pullout comes in one of its few advertisements. Main Line Animal Rescue, a Philadelphia group that apparently specializes in saving "Bully Breeds" of dogs, bought space in the section.

The ad copy, placed alongside a photo of what I assume is a pit bull:

Attention Football Fans: Philadelphia is playing Washington on October 26.

Every time Michael Vick is tackled during the game, Main Line Animal Rescue will donate 5 bags of dog food to your local animal shelter.

"Because there are no second chances on an empty stomach."

Consider volunteering at your local shelter on the day of the game. Spend some time walking, or brushing, or bathing, or hugging a homeless Pit Bull.

Not exactly the bounty on players' heads that led to the famous "Body Bag Game" between the Skins and Eagles in 1990, but, still.

My sense is the outrage against Vick has waned so much and so fast that by the time the Eagles get to DC, there'll be a lot more talk about the wildcat offense than dog killing.

(By the way: The other ads in the Post's football section are: four small spots for imported car dealers, one for a job fair, and a half-pager, the biggest in the section) announcing a blowout chain saw sale. Men! Men! Men!)

***

(AFTER THE JUMP: Wilbon already blames Snyder for lousy season? Kornheiser speaks no Snyder? Unseld whupped Yao's dad? The Asian Bias™ in golf affects White House visit? The Nats Countdown to 100 Losses starts now? Pedro Martinez already has more wins than most Nats?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: And If You Break Michael Vick’s Leg, We’ll Throw in a Chew Toy!" »

Somebody should tell Sam Rogers that feuds are good for radio. He won't take my word for it.

Rogers is Senior Vice President and Market Manager of CBS Radio for the DC cluster, which means he's the boss at WJFK, the city's new sportstalk station and rival to Dan Snyder's WTEM.

Rogers' station also tried to create a rivalry with Snyder in the parking realm. But Snyder crushed him right out of the gate.

Read More "FanZoneGate™ Update: WJFK Boss Wants No Part of Feud After Getting Schooled By Dan Snyder!" »

FanZoneGate™ Update: Redskins spokesman Karl Swanson says WJFK, a new sportsradio station and rival to Dan Snyder's WTEM, had no business selling passes to the FanZone, a new private parking lot near FedExField that was set to compete with the Snyder-owned lots on Redskins game days.

Folks who bought FanZone parking passes on WJFK's web site and showed up to Saturday's preseason game with Pittsburgh found that Snyder had taken over the lot.

Yesterday, a marketing rep for CBS-owned WPGC, a WJFK sister station that was also promoting the parking lot, told me “some situations occurred” that led to Snyder’s takeover.

The marketing rep, however, would not go into detail over how the promotion, which positioned the FanZone lot as cheaper than Snyder's lots and without the new tailgating restrictions that so many fans are concerned about, fell apart.

Swanson says all the problems come from WJFK selling parking passes before getting the rights to use the land.

"[I]n a nutshell the Redskins, the radio stations and (I think) one other group were in separate negotiations to lease the lot as a parking site," Swanson tells me via email. "For reasons unbeknownst to us, the radio stations began advertising the lot without a contract and as negotiations were ongoing.  We entered terms and leased the lot for game day parking."

The Redskins did the fans who bought passes a solid for the Pittsburgh game, Swanson says: "[W]e decided to honor all of the passes the radio stations had already sold."

(AFTER THE JUMP: The sad tale of Bullets gaffer Dick Gibbs? Local rookie Brett Cecil makes his own blooper tape? Best of the decade time...already? AAU teammates Durant and Beasley make different sorts of news? Would only an idiot reference the Tom Boswell Curse?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Snyder Crushes Radio Rival WJFK in Redskins Parking Lot Battle" »

For the Titanic platform (or maybe not!) of the latest City Paper, I wrote about Dan Snyder's newest parking scheme.

Snyder now adds a parking surcharge to the cost of every ticket sold at non-football events at FedExField. All other venues around town put parking charges, if there are any, in the advertised price of the ticket.

Snyder doesn't. He throws it at the consumer at the point of purchase, as a line item on the invoice that can't be turned down by the buyer. For Paul McCartney, where around 60,000 folks attended and there was a $10 per ticket parking charge, whether they intended to use FedEx parking services or not, that added an additional $600,000 to Snyder's bank account.

For U2's upcoming show at FedEx, the forced charge is $8 per ticket; if that show sells out, the add-on charge will mean more than $700,000 sneaky dollars for Snyder. And this is with zero overhead, unless you count the cost to his reputation, which really can't be harmed around here at this point.

Snyder's the king of parking schemes, as outlined in the story, and a godfather of the sneaky surcharge: He's the guy, remember, who after buying the Redskins took a ticket price that had historically included state and local taxes, and then added a new charge equal to the state and local taxes onto the old ticket price, but left the old price as the face value of Skins tickets -- just so he could act like he wasn't really raising the price of tickets!

So where's the outrage?

***

Betting Football season begins tonight!

(AFTER THE JUMP: Cheap Seats Daily gives you tonight's winner? "Biggest Loser" back in play? Which pregame show are you going to listen to? What's the meanest sport? Is there a Curse of Tom Boswell?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Dan Snyder’s Sneaky Parking Charge Nets Him Millions?" »

Ralph Friedgen is getting more attention than any of his Maryland players this preseason, all because he lost weight. Friedgen dropped a reported 105 pounds time around.

Good for him.

But these Friedgen-Lost-Weight stories are threatening to be like the Michael-Westbrook-Is-Finally-Focused articles that used to run around here every year at this time. Friedgen, remember, got just as much notice for dropping weight in 2002.

Friedgen had announced he was losing 100 pounds, and coerced Terp boosters to donate $1,000 per pound toward the building fund for the Gossett Team House, a facility for athletes. Whatever lbs. he lost while fundraising he got back real quick, with interest.

I always wondered if Friedgen gave the money back.

***

The Washington Post won't run Tank McNamara's Michael Vick story line.

Michael Cavna, on the Post's Comic Riffs blog, says Managing Editor Raju Narisetti decided the panels were "inappropriate."

The Post didn't censor McNamara during the 2000 football season, when the strip ripped Washington Redskins owner Dan Snyder repeatedly, and honored him with its annual "Sports Jerk of the Year" award.

In a 2004  Q&A on washingtonpost.com, "Tank McNamara" creator Jeff Millar explained how and why Snyder got the nod:

(AFTER THE JUMP: Why's Snyder a jerk? In local sports radio, Ed Bradley lives on? Tom Boswell jinxes the Nats, too?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Did Friedgen Ever Give Back the Weight-Loss Money?" »