Donovan the Viking: He arrived from Philadelphia amid so much hope and excitement. And then: A belly flop. Are we talking about Jayson Werth? No, silly—Donovan McNabb! The Redskins appear close to a deal to send last year's franchise savior to the Minnesota Vikings in exchange for a pair of sixth-round draft picks. We might settle for seventh-rounders if the Twins could take Werth as part of the bargain. +2

Walter Reed Joins the Navy: A sword that once belonged to Army physician Walter Reed—the guy who discovered that yellow fever was mosquito-borne—was officially handed by an Army general to a Navy admiral, symbolizing the official close of the century-old Georgia Avenue military hospital, and its partial transfer to the National Naval Medical Center in Bethesda. Meanwhile, D.C. and the State Department may split the old campus, with plans for a supermarket and an embassy enclave among those under consideration. It's unclear whether Wegman's employees or foreign diplomats would ever get access to Dr. Reed's old sword. -1

Amnesty for Illegals: Illegal parkers, that is. D.C.'s Department of Motor Vehicles announced plans for an amnesty for ticket scofflaws: Folks with unpaid tickets written before this year can avoid penalties or points if they pay up in the next six months. There are more than 4 million unpaid tickets out there, totaling $245.7 million. Half of that is owed by drivers from Maryland or Virginia. +1

Bikeshare of the Now: 32 new Capital Bikeshare stations—that's 265 bikes—will soon grace D.C.'s neighborhoods. About a year after its inauguration, the popular system is expanding to accommodate demands from its users. And, bonus: 18 high-traffic stations that are frequently completely empty or full ("dockblocked") will get some relief with additional docks. A statement from DDOT Director Terry Bellamy boasts that this will "expand the program's capacity by 22 percent in the downtown area, by 80 percent in our East of the River operations and by an average of 38 percent throughout each of the additional Wards." +3

Yesterday's Needle rating: 39 Today's score: +5 Today's Needle rating: 44

Prepare yourselves for all kinds of anti-Islam vitriol in the coming days and weeks; stuff that will likely dwarf anti-teabagger sentiments and provide some sort of twisted justification for prolonging our military's stay in Iraq and Afghanistan.

-On a more upbeat note, Will Wilkinson maintains that Maine was just a hiccup:

"My new dog groomer has a husband. He told me so Tuesday afternoon. We live in Iowa where, since April of this year, a man can legally marry a man. Since May, it has been possible in Maine to do the same. Or it was until Tuesday, when a slim majority of Maine voters chose to repeal their state’s new same-sex marriage law. Some conservatives are elated. Over at National Review, Maggie Gallagher was dancing a jig. "The People have exercized [sic] their veto. This is huge. I am so happy," she gushed. But traditionalists shouldn’t be so happy. Because this is not so huge. My dog groomer still has a husband. And marriage equality is coming back to Maine."

-Erik Wemple's "Final Thoughts on Allen v. Roig-Franzia" is a worthwhile read, and not just for the gratuitous cock-sucking references.

- The National Journal reports that the Competitive Enterprise Institute, a leading conservative think tank which prides itself on rejecting any sort of government approach to environmental preservation, is in the red:

But this year, amidst economic turmoil, contributions are down 15 per cent and the group is running a deficit of roughly 10 per cent, Smith told National Journal's Under The Influence. That comes to about $450,000 worth of red-ink–though some sources suggest the hole may be deeper. Smith says the group's reserves have cushioned the loss and that he has seen an uptick in fundraising recently.

This kind of financial upset isn't just common in the think tank community–the American Enterprise Institute, home of the Iraq War, faced calamity earlier this year–it also gives layers of meaning to the phrase "currency of ideas."

-To bring us back full circle, The Agitator has the link to a series of ACLU video profiles of "Gitmo prisoners detained, tortured, and then released without charge." Proving, once again, that sick shit begets sick shit.

Her last day at the office of the Assistant Deputy Under Secretary of Defense (Logistics & Materiel Readiness – Program Support) was yesterday. In her farewell note to colleagues, she writes: "I now plan to become a full-time volunteer clown and spend time during the week doing what I've had time to do only on weekends for the past few years: bringing smiles to the faces of children and children-at-heart."

Kopff, who has brought her act, along with her husband, to NIH Children's Inn, Children's Hospital, Georgetown Hospital's pediatric ward, and INOVA Fairfax's pediatric ward, among other places, now plans to spend the bulk of her clown time at Walter Reed Army Medical Center. At Walter Reed, she feels a connection to the wounded vets and their families: the people her former job, in some way, affected.

She's careful with the balloons around some, though. They pop. "So you can imagine the trauma that could bring up, especially if you're a patient just back from Iraq or Afghanistan. So we're careful. We ask. Or we just do magic tricks," she says.

Sometimes she'll ask patients what other VIPs, besides her, have visited. Some say the Secretary of Defense. "Oh, he's my boss," she'll say. "But, to be honest, they're more impressed with the Redskins cheerleaders."

No matter. Kopff, 61, still plans to go often, driving from her Cleveland Park house to Mologne House on the grounds of Walter Reed, where she arrives in her getup, complete with a 3-foot baloon hat she gives away at each visit and clown shoes dating from the 1950s. She doesn't wear face paint, since "some children and, really some adults, are afraid of a clown with face paint."

The kids at Walter Reed, most of whom are dependents of the soldiers, "love it." The parents welcome the distraction. Soldiers alone in a room will get the full clown treatment if they're up for it. "There was this one guy, very handsome, probably in his mid-20s, about 6-5, in a wheelchair and missing a leg. He was outside smoking with his mom and yelled to me: 'Hello, Clown. If you ever want to get rid of those shoes, I'm a size 16....I can take one of them.' So they make me laugh sometimes."

Kopff does more than clown for the vets. Since last December, she's been collecting music and movies for them. She and her husband are no longer accepting VHS tapes ("my husband said, 'Enough, already'"), but they will take any DVDs, DVD players, or CDs and donate them either to Walter Reed or the the D.C. VA Medical Center. She keeps a big box on her front porch on Newark Street NW as a dropoff. Got media you'd like to pile in? E-mail Judy: jkopff[at]aol[dot]com. Maybe if you're nice, she'll make you a poodle.