Wednesday morning’s roundup is brought to you by the young and restless intern, who is refusing  to write about any Social-Security-sucking, ozone-depleting, spotlight-hogging baby boomers today.

While walking past a convenience store last  week, I noticed a sign that borderline panicked: “Get your vanilla cigarettes before they are banned!” The sign nearly inspired my non-smoking self into stockpiling like it was 1999, but it appears I am too late. The FDA has banned the sale of flavored tobacco, three months after President Barack Obama agreed to let the FDA regulate tobacco products. What’s so wrong with having a little “Warm Winter Toffee” with your lung cancer? According to the New York Times, 17-year-olds are three times more likely than those over 25 to smoke the flavored cigarettes.

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DC smokers, will you accept the Great American Smokeout Challenge, sponsored by the American Cancer Society? If you're feeling up to the task--which involves abstaining for one day (today)--check out the society's guide to quitting and staying that way (sadly, the guide was unavailable to one Mark Twain, the speaker of this post's title. Perhaps with it, he would've quit only once, but I doubt it.)

For those of you who are too cool to quit, join me in asking Michael Kinsley to extend to us his blessing of President-Elect Barack Obama's addiction.

Read More "“To cease smoking is the easiest thing I ever did. I ought to know because I’ve done it a thousand times.”" »