With sizzling sun on tap for Memorial Day, D.C.’s political media is turning its thoughts poolside.

And no, that’s not because Thursday’s massive recall on pool drains—issued by the Consumer Product Safety Commission—threatened to chase swimmers away from pools faster than a wayward Baby Ruth bar. Thankfully, local watering holes are safe.

“So far, we're not affected by this in the District,” says John Stokes, a spokesman for D.C.’s Department of Parks and Recreation. DPR's “aquatic teams” (no word on whether or not Arthur Curry is a member of said teams) will be monitoring the drains going forward.

The local press corps has its eyes on the water for another reason: Mayor Vince Gray will officially open the pools Friday at noon. And with the opening comes an important choice.

Will he take the plunge? Cannonball Watch 2011 is on.

Gray’s predecessor Adrian Fenty declined to take part in the mayoral leap, an annual tradition of the Anthony Williams administration. The Post’s Mike DeBonis called that decision a fitting indication of Fenty’s dry personality.

“The refusal to do the yearly cannonball was in retrospect an early and obvious sign of Fenty's aloofness,” he tweeted.

NBC 4’s Tom Sherwood—once Fenty’s hand-picked choice to take the dive in his stead—wondered who will replace Gray if the mayor decides to keep his shirt on.

“I suggest the 13 council members, synchronized,” he offered.

After Thursday’s contentious redistricting hearing, don’t bet on any synchronized swimming. The councilmembers would probably be dunking each other instead.

We’ll update this post to let you know if Gray decides to jump. One warning sign: His public schedule says he will "offer remarks, cut ribbon," but mentions nothing at all about taking a swim.

Photo by Matt Dunn

Sandy Point State Park, Annapolis, MD.  Jan. 29th. © 2011 Matt Dunn

Takoma Community Center, February 13

Alan Henny photo

Unless Dewey Beach commissioners don grass skirts and lead a conga line down Route 1, last Saturday’s water rescue wins Summer’s Strangest by a long shot. Rachel Decenzi, a 30-year-old from Media, Penn., was naked, imperiled, and screaming for help – in about four feet of water.

Just look at the photo. This doesn't end well.

Local police scanner enthusiast Alan Henney was on-scene, and chatted with Jason Kilmer of Olney, Md., Decenzi’s would-be savior. Kilmer said he was standing on the dock of the Rusty Rudder when he heard a cry for help. Sensing perhaps that this was his moment, Kilmer stripped down and plunged into the waist-deep water. When he waded out to Decenzi, he said, she was clearly unstable, babbling manically.

"I tried to get her to tell me where she came from and what her deal was,” he said. “All I got from her was that her name was Rachel."

He didn’t succeed in baiting her back to shore. By this time, Rudder staff had alerted Dewey Beach Police. By the time Sgt. Cliff Dempsey and Seasonal Patrolman Andrew Street arrived, Decenzi had retreated further into the bay. The tide caught her pulled her west.

“All of a sudden, she was out far enough that we couldn’t see her anymore,” Dempsey said.

A boat from Bethany Beach Fire Department was en route, but Dempsey said the ebbing tide forced their hand. The officers stripped down to their pants and hopped in the bay, wading out until they had to swim.

Dempsey and Street found Decenzi sobbing about 300 yards offshore. The tossed a rescue ring over her head and  pushed against the tide on the return swim. Dempsey said they were trudging onto shore when the Bethany boat arrived.

A Rehoboth Beach was examining a hysteric Decenzi when she attacked him, forcing exhausted and exasperated Dewey cops to arrest her. After a brief medical and psychological examination at Beebe Medical Center, a Justice of the Peace committed her to Sussex Correction Institute in default of a $2,500 secured bond.

Police didn’t say whether Decenzi was under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

Dempsey stressed that the dramatic swim was fairly run-of-the-mill, so far as bizarre water rescues go.

“It’s nothing special,” he said. “It’s something anyone would have done.”

Still, he said, it’s a hell of a way to wrap up the summer.

“End it with a bang,” he said, sounding none too sad to close the book on August.

Peter Nickles' average day lasted longer than yours: He got up at 4:30 a.m. and went for his traditaional swim. Nickles, famous for marthoning and triathloning—and also Blackberrying, even at 70!—has had trouble with his knees in recent days, forcing him to quit running. After embarkring on more biking and swimming, however, "my knees are feeling better," he says. 

There could be a comeback!

By Mike DeBonis

*Acknowledging that pot smoking is not such a great thing: "No matter how many people defend marijuana and extol decriminalization for using it, there are studies that say the stuff is bad for important functions like reasoning, and can lead to worse abuses."

*Not scolding the ace swimmer for screwing up: "At any rate, Phelps was probably making way too much money. He’s lucky his fingertips had better mojo than the fingertips of that Serbian-American swimmer who finished second in the 100-meter butterfly. Wonder if what’s-his-name has been to any good parties at the University of South Carolina lately?"

*And coming up with a better solution than USA Swimming's three-month competition ban for Phelps: "What USA Swimming, the national federation, should have done was make him perform community service by competing in swim meets every day of the week and give him obligatory practices, since this is a lad who obviously functions better in chlorinated water than on terra firma."

If ever there's another episode in which a famous and rich athlete is caught with a bong, I'm going straight to Vecsey.