Great Moments in Capitalism™, Special 9/11 Edition

On this date in 2005: Get your Tragedy Hats!

None of the Redskins marketing endeavors under Dan Snyder dropped the jaw faster than the "Redskins Flag Hat" that went on sale on the team's web site and at FedExField at the beginning of the 2005 season.

For $23.99 plus shipping where applicable, Snyder would sell you a Redskin baseball cap with a red, white and blue Pentagon stitched on the side to tug the heart strings and stir more nationalism at a time when the country was already crippled by an oversupply. The hats were a great way, according to the radio ads that ran on the sports stations owned by Snyder, to "commemorate Sept. 11."

The punch line: The proceeds weren't earmarked for any charity or cause. Unless you consider the owner's wallet a charity or cause.

Genius!

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(AFTER THE JUMP: Bankers going for Michael Vick haters? Bob McDonnell, you lie? Boswell basking in the afterglow of his Snyder bashing? DC Divas become video stars? A bump in the Nats' Road to 100 Losses?  Jaycee Dugard jokes?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: It’s 9/11! Did You Pay $23.99 Plus Shipping for Dan Snyder’s Commemorative Hat?" »

The NFL season starts tonight. The only must-read of all the pre-kickoff previews: Erik Wemple's take on Sunday's Redskins/Giants game. His post attracted a group of meatheads to the comments section the way a roach motel does roaches. It's a meathead motel, is what I'm sayin'. Don't miss it.

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A near-miss must-read: "A Decade of Snyder the Decider," an interactive piece that came out this week on the Washington Post's site. An amazing amount of work and brainpower went into the feature. Everything you want to know about Dan Snyder's reign is right there in a few squared inches. You just have to click and click and click and click to get it.

But in the end this delivery system is totally unsatisfying to any football fan who likes to read about the game in a real sports page. It's the difference between listening to the White Album on vinyl through a tube amp while holding the double-LP's sleeve and fingering through all the sleeve-candy, or listening to the White Album through headphones and an iPod (if it were available on iTunes, that is).

(AFTER THE JUMP: Vick Chew Toy giveaway is real? Marv Throneberry trumps Cal? The Felds run Monster Trucks, too? Harvey Grant's kid follows in Adrian Dantley's footsteps? Mark Brunell's the Bill Graham of Christian rock? Nats countdown update?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Special Non-Pullout Football Preview Section!" »

For the Titanic platform (or maybe not!) of the latest City Paper, I wrote about Dan Snyder's newest parking scheme.

Snyder now adds a parking surcharge to the cost of every ticket sold at non-football events at FedExField. All other venues around town put parking charges, if there are any, in the advertised price of the ticket.

Snyder doesn't. He throws it at the consumer at the point of purchase, as a line item on the invoice that can't be turned down by the buyer. For Paul McCartney, where around 60,000 folks attended and there was a $10 per ticket parking charge, whether they intended to use FedEx parking services or not, that added an additional $600,000 to Snyder's bank account.

For U2's upcoming show at FedEx, the forced charge is $8 per ticket; if that show sells out, the add-on charge will mean more than $700,000 sneaky dollars for Snyder. And this is with zero overhead, unless you count the cost to his reputation, which really can't be harmed around here at this point.

Snyder's the king of parking schemes, as outlined in the story, and a godfather of the sneaky surcharge: He's the guy, remember, who after buying the Redskins took a ticket price that had historically included state and local taxes, and then added a new charge equal to the state and local taxes onto the old ticket price, but left the old price as the face value of Skins tickets -- just so he could act like he wasn't really raising the price of tickets!

So where's the outrage?

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Betting Football season begins tonight!

(AFTER THE JUMP: Cheap Seats Daily gives you tonight's winner? "Biggest Loser" back in play? Which pregame show are you going to listen to? What's the meanest sport? Is there a Curse of Tom Boswell?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Dan Snyder’s Sneaky Parking Charge Nets Him Millions?" »

The Arena Football League ain't ever coming to DC after all.

Sports leagues, like romantic relationships, can't survive taking a break. Last year AFL owners thought they were different, announcing that while they'd be spending the 2009 season apart, they weren't breaking up.

Again: Just need some space. Just taking some time off from each other before getting back together.

Well, this week, several AFL owners leaked to the press the date that they'll be getting back together: The 12th....OF NEVER!

The AFL is dead.

The disbanding means, alas, Dan Snyder won't ever bring us the AFL team he promised back in 1999.

(AFTER THE JUMP: MMA is the next arena football? How many Redskins blogs are out there? Dan Steinberg marvels at whose muscles? The Washington Times toasts Bruce Smith? Michael Vick is partying where? The Nats are still playing?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Washington Warriors Won’t Ever Play in the AFL?" »

I wrote a column this week about one of the bizarrest happenings in local prep ball history, and a game I'd been hearing about for years: The 1970 summer league matchup between John Thompson's St. Anthony's squad and the Morgan Wootten-coached DeMatha.

They were the two best teams in the city back then, and played before a huge crowd on a little outdoor court at Jelleff.

Well, they sort of played. Thompson made the evening memorable, though for wholly unsporting reasons. He kept his star-stocked lineup, full of future NCAA Division 1 players, on the bench, and instead sent in a ringer squad of non-basketball players to face DeMatha. The Stags took no pity on the replacements, crushing the kids in St. Anthony's uniforms, 108-26.

DeMatha players and the hoop-crazy fans who believed the hype and took the trouble that hot summer night to get to Jelleff, a boys club off Wisconsin Avenue, are still peeved at Thompson for making a mockery of the matchup.

But at the time the future Georgetown legend was anything but contrite.

(AFTER THE JUMP: Thompson ducked Wootten for Ducking Thompson? Nats win a video replay battle, lose the war? Larry Weisman practices the real new journalism? Michael Vick is the new Justin Timberlake? Greyhounds have friends?)

Read More "Cheap Seats Daily: Michael Vick Is the New Justin Timberlake?" »

To a weekly contract, following his release by the Dallas Cowboys.

I am sure that such a short-term deal wouldn't jibe with the contract that the NFL has negotiated with the NFLPA, but there should be a clause for a guy like Terrell Owens: If you've acted like a jackass for your entire career yet still have the talent to help a team, you get a weekly deal. The determination as to whether you've been a jackass your entire career could be left up to a panel of media experts plus reps from the players and coaches, as well. Throw in a fan from each team, and you got a regular football parliament. You'd need a two-thirds vote to attach the jackass tag on someone, and the player in question would get a chance to plead his case before a plenary meeting of the jock parliament.

That's how things should work.