Lions and Tigers and Bears, Oh My: Okay, they're not pandas. But the debut Monday of the National Zoo's lion cubs should still set off alarms for possible cute overload. All seven of the cubs, born over the summer, will be "previewed" for Friends of the National Zoo members tomorrow, then—depending on weather—released outside early [...]

Chandra Case Closing Quickly: So much for the trial of the century; the court proceeding against Ingmar Guandique, who prosecutors say killed former Bureau of Prisons intern/Gary Condit paramour Chandra Levy, is likely to end ahead of schedule. Authorities dropped two charges against Guandique today, including charges that he attempted to sexually assault Levy before [...]

Hard-Earned Wisdom: Yesterday afternoon, Washington Post sports columnist Mike Wise appeared to have a huge scoop on Twitter—Steelers QB Ben Roethlisberger would be suspended for five games for an alleged assault. Before you could say "April Fool's in August," the Internet was abuzz with the news. Which was precisely Wise's point; the whole thing was [...]

It's baby-birthing mania over at the National Zoo. The zoo's 5-year-old lion Shera gave birth to a litter of four cubs overnight. The first-time mom is resting comfortably with her new pests.
And that's not all, folks! Baby daddy Luke also likely knocked up Shera's sister, Nababiep, in June. She's expected to give birth sometime in [...]

A Weekend of Mental Anguish: While Glenn Beck and his friends are sure to annoy plenty of District denizens this weekend, thanks to the intrepid reporting by The Washington Post's Tim Craig, mental images of Vince Gray in Sex and the City have the potential to create some distress as we're all falling asleep tonight. [...]

What To Expect When Lions Are Expecting: National Zoo officials say Shera and Nababiep, their two female lions, are both pregnant. The only male lion in Woodley Park, Luke, is the father. Apparently, things get exciting at the Zoo after hours! (Or at least, officials think things get exciting; the pregnancy may be only imaginary. "There's always room for error," [...]

The panda experiment failed
Now hopes ride on lizards quite scaled
To us they seem slinky
To them is that kinky?
Let's hope they get righteously nailed
With school getting set to resume
It seems that more firings loom
M. Rhee is selective
If deemed "ineffective"
A teacher will soon meet his doom
Don't cross her when talking 'bout sportin'
She's Eleanor "Badass" Holmes Norton
When those [...]

Morning, all. It's my last Morning Roundup, I'm sad to report. (On the other hand, sleeping in an extra hour on Fridays sounds pretty nice.) We'll be rolling out some exciting new changes on City Desk. Keep your eyes peeled.
It's no secret it's been hot as Hades recently. ("Sofa king hot," as one of our [...]

Morning, all. It's the end of a short week, but I still feel drained. Here's to a rejuvenating weekend.
So, LeBron's going to Miami. Along with Chris Bosh. And the newly re-signed Dwayne Wade. Move over, Los Angeles, there's a new dynasty in town.
Sad news from the National Zoo: The red panda born three weeks ago–the zoo's [...]

Let the media frenzy begin! Appearing on The Colbert Report last night, Washington Post columnist Marc Fisher kicked-off World Cup fever in true American fashion–by trashing the game of soccer entirely. "Soccer is un-American," Fisher, proud owner of the title America's Most Prominent Soccer Hater, told host Stephen Colbert. "It's a great game for little kids running around on [...]

Vanity Fair's new profile of Sally Quinn is out, and it's chock-full of less-than-flattering details about the "star journalist [and] superstar hostess." The piece has plenty of details about Quinn's fraught relationship with the Bradlee family and her infamous final "The Party" column,  but it's most notable for its digs at her much ballyhooed social [...]

The Andean cubs have been seen
With mama bear (named Billie Jean)
The way that they tumbled
M.J. would be humbled
On dance floors, the bear is a queen
The lib ain't intended to last
Perhaps it's a little half-assed
A driver, quite drunk
Took out a big chunk
And shut it all down (that was fast)
This lim'rick is, um, quite hard-hitting
But HushGalleria is [...]

Goodbye to the talk of wrong-doing
In home repair; donor-pursuing
Gray's name had been smeared
But now he is cleared
'Bout time; he's got votes to be wooing
There's nothing quite like a spring breeze
Though why does it smell like disease?!
As ginkgoes unfurl
The trees smell like hurl
So spray and spray soon, pretty please?
Some folks find the contract delighting
(That 20 percent [...]

The Issue: It’s elephant feeding time! As tourist season nears, local businesses around the Woodley Park-Zoo/Adams Morgan Metro station gear up for zoo-goers, leaving eateries and shops near the Cleveland Park Metro out in the cold. In the early '80s, the Washington Metropolitan Area Transit Authority (WMATA) designated Woodley Park as the official National Zoo [...]

Gay marriage: Repubs want to scratch it
Amendment: They tried to attach it
The "big fucking deal"
Rejected their zeal
Since Dems had the votes to dispatch it
I'm hearing the soundbite already
Enrollment in schools is quite steady
The first time in years
They've calmed parents' fears
(Or private school fees are too heady?)
Some places can now safely boast
That citizens like them the [...]