Huh. City Paper alum Mike DeBonis notes that the new top editor at the Huffington Post is one Jimmy Soni, a 26-year-old former speechwriter for Mayor Vince Gray who worked in the mayor's office until April of last year.

City Paper

City taxi drivers: Hire an accountant. A new taxicab industry reform proposal backed by Mayor Vincent C. Gray offers lots for cab riders but also an innovation cabdrivers would rather do without: Real-time tracking of trips and fares sent directly from cabs to the D.C. Taxicab Commission, which would replace the current system of paper-based, easily doctored manifests. D.C. Council member Mary M. Cheh (D-Ward 3) argues that the new system will make it more convenient for drivers, who would no longer have to maintain paper records, and for riders, who would see service patterns improve based on the data collected. But if the data make their way to government revenue collectors, drivers can expect a whole lot more attention from the tax man in the years to come.

Do you have resolutions for this year's notable Washingtonians?

Photo by Wayan Vota via Flickr/Creative Commons Attribution Generic 2.0 License

City Paper alum Mike DeBonis tries to quell the rising panic about the fare increase by pointing out that there's plenty of opposition, and even those in favor of fair increases want cab upgrades. Besides, as we noted yesterday, under this scheme, some surcharges would actually be eliminated.

Photo by Darrow Montgomery

"Five for Fenty," by Stinky Dink, is Ron Moten's latest effort to boost his pal's q-rating with musical outreach. It'll soon be blaring at "all the clubs, all the the DJs, all the events," Moten tells DeBonis. (Listen to the song here.) The song features Stinky Dink rapping about Fenty's achievements over a classic Backyard Band cover of the Luniz's "I Got Five On It."

DeBonis has been in D.C. a while, but he didn't initially realize the musical provenance of the song; another former City Paper staffer (and now TBD writer), Sarah Godrey, set him straight on the weed-buying origins of the phrase "five on it" (which does seem a little off-message for Fenty). Still, our former Loose Lips columnist is a dogged reporter, and once I pointed out the Backyard angle, it didn't take long for DeBonis to acquaint himself with the go-go cover that undergirds the Fenty anthem.

Backyard Band frontman Anwan "Big G" Glover makes a cameo in the Fenty song. But if you'd like to listen to "I Got Five On It" with more Big G and without lyrics like "If you in the game, you can take it from a playa/the grass ain't greener over there, it look Gray-er," enjoy:

In another move to boost liquidity: Lawmakers will allow D.C. liquor stores to open for business on July 4, a Sunday, when such beloved neighborhood institutions are normally closed. Naturally, not everyone supports the holiday exemption to the rule. The Post quotes Councilmember Yvette Alexander griping, "the Jack Daniels and the firecrackers – that's not a good mix."

WTOP reports from the BP fill-up station at 7605 Georgia Avenue NW, where owner Shahzad Aslam claims to have lost 40 percent of gasoline sales since the oil spill fiasco in the Gulf of Mexico. "[Even though it's] a BP gas station, BP is not directly involved," Shahzad tells WTOP. Still, protesters have picketed his pumps, "apparently unaware their efforts were doing more damage to a local business owner and his employees than an international oil giant."

In other news: WUSA-TV reports that police have identified a fatal shooting victim found in Fort Dupont Park on June 9 as 43-year-old Don Diego Jones of Temple Hills, an opera singer with the National Orchestra. Police have also arrested a Southeast D.C. man in connection to a triple shooting in Shaw last week, according to the Post.

Expect afternoon thunderstorms in the "strong to severe" range, with the "main threats being damaging winds and perhaps large hail," say forecasters with WJLA-TV. Sunshine returns tomorrow.

Video by DCWASAPublicAffairs/YouTube

As proof that the Post can be stuffy
They're turning DeBonis less scruffy
Goodbye Sally Quinn
And hello, Mike's chin!
His hair and her column…both fluffy

Why stop, here's another cheap shot:
So how 'bout those numbers Vince got?!
The data provided
Counts just folks "decided"
And what does that mean? Not a lot

This race needs a little more heat
But now it at least has a beat
It sure ain't Chuck Brown
But Fenty gets down
The airwaves have this on repeat

Admittedly, it's a cliché
But where there's a will, there's a way
No more will seniority
Hold top priority
Quality now links to pay

Prosecutors are scrambling for an answer in the Robert Wone murder trial, now pointing their clumsy judicial finger at Wone’s brother, Michael Price. But according to WaPo, U.S. attorney Glenn Kirschner claims that the prosecution does not have enough evidence to charge the brother – or anyone else – with Wone’s stabbing. Even horse blood and pork loin can’t solve this case.

In other news, Pocahontas chained herself to the White House fence yesterday. Q'orianka Kilcher, the actress known for playing the Native American diva in the 2005 film “The New World,” was chained near the White House gate with the help of her mother, who assisted by pouring black paint over her daughter’s body. A showing of Native American solidarity? Nay. The two women were allegedly protesting Peruvian President Alan Garcia’s visit with President Obama on Tuesday. Garcia is moving to sell large swaths of indigenous land to oil companies and other foreign investors. Maybe Kilcher could’ve just sang a song about it.

D.C. residents are still moaning about the aesthetics of streetcar wires, but D.C. Councilmember Tommy Wells has come to save the complicated transit plan. Wells introduced a bill yesterday that would modify the antiquated ban on overhead wires in the District.

City Paper all-star alum Mike DeBonis started his new blog today at WaPo. For those unfamiliar with Mike’s work as WCP's Loose Lips columnist, you’re in for a treat. Congrats, Mike!

Photo by alotofmillion/Wikimedia Commons

Two of our best and brightest debarked for TBD.com, a startup that introduced itself with a pledge to scrimp on the "Who? What? When? Where? Why?" The "five Ws," their promise goes, will be delivered to readers "perhaps a couple at a time."

Not to toot my own horn, but I've been leaving that and all sorts of other basic/crucial information out of my City Paper stories for more than 24 years now. Go look in our archives under my byline: It's not all there!

But staying relevant ain't what it was before I went out on baby sabbatical.

So let me right here and now pledge to the hundreds of folks who got in touch to ask why I wasn't typing both my readers: Stick with Cheap Seats and Cheap Seats Daily, and we'll work even harder to not give you more facts than our talented former colleagues won't be giving you. No time for the what AND the when? You got it: It'll be either/or in this space. You find the why confusing? Me, too! Heck, with management's blessing, I'll snap the dang "W" off every keyboard! Forget the wishy-washy "perhaps" offered by our rivals: From now on, "the who" becomes "the ho" with us! (So maybe they are page-view visionaries after all?)

Speaking of changing times: I'm going to go call Dan Snyder and ask for an interview now. Haven't done that in years. But while wiping butts I kept hearing there's a "new culture" at Redskins Park...

The Virginian-Pilot reported Saturday that the seal on Cuccinelli's staff pins is different from the one usually used by the state. While the typical seal has Roman goddess Virtus baring one breast, in Cuccinnelli's version, both mammaries are covered with armor. How very John Ashcroft of him! When he passed out the pins, Cuccinnelli said the new version was more modest.

WaPo has Cuccinnelli saying he was joking, but that doesn't stop porn mustache cultivator Larry Sabato from dropping in for a laugh at Cuccinelli's expense:

The joke might be on him, said University of Virginia political scientist Larry Sabato.“When you ask to be ridiculed, it usually happens. And it will happen here, nationally,” he said. “This is classical art, for goodness’ sake.”

WAMU's Kojo Nnamdi, who is never modest in his loud shirts, gave outgoing Loose Lips Mike Debonis a Bud Light-inspired "Real Kojo Guests of Genius" send-off on Friday. Highlight: calling Debonis the "warlock of the Wilson Building."

Meanwhile, the Unification Church is looking for buyers for the Washington Times. Former editor John Solomon is listed as a potential buyer, but I've got a better idea.

Philip Anschutz, the conservative mogul behind the Examiner and the Weekly Standard, should buy it. He gets a marginally more respected publication, and a higher-tier stable of conservative pundits. It's the perfect opportunity to dump Gregory Kane!

Did anyone hear all that noise on City Desk from about 8:40 this morning to about 2:48 in the afternoon? No? Well, that's the sound of Loose Lips columnist Mike DeBonis leaving the paper. We'll miss Mike. You can read his final column here, in which he surrenders the initials "LL."

Photo by Darrow Montgomery

Life is coming full circle for best-selling author Michael Schaffer. "The first story I wrote at Washington City Paper, I was living with my parents at the time," he says. "I think I'll be staying with them again during this transition, although I better ask them first."

The 36-year-old D.C. native and City Paper alum, currently living in Philadelphia, was named the paper's new editor on Monday. (Schaffer and his family will be moving back to the D.C. area as soon as he can find a place, or gets sick of riding Megabus, or whichever comes first.)

"I'm sort of over the moon right now," Schaffer tells City Desk. "City Paper was the first job I ever had and the most fun I've ever had at a job. I cherish the place."

His appointment plugs a nagging gap at the top of the masthead left by former editor Erik Wemple's departure in March.

Schaffer, who previously worked as a reporter and senior editor at the paper from 1997 to 2000 (before slumming it at U.S. News & World Report and, later, the Philadelphia Inquirer), met with editorial staffers over lunch last week, a powwow he described as encouraging.

Schaffer says one early priority will be filling some of the holes caused by a spate of previously announced staff departures, including several City Paper stalwarts, such as managing editor Andrew Beaujon, senior writer Jason Cherkis and Loose Lips columnist Mike DeBonis.

"A lot of really good people," Schaffer says. "But I also see it as an opportunity to bring on board some people who I feel comfortable with, and who the staff feel comfortable with ... who have strengths that I might not have."

In accepting the post, Schaffer will be taking the reins of an almost entirely different beast than the one he left a decade ago. But he's just fine with that.

"In my life, I tend to not believe in going back," Schaffer says. "One of the things that is most exciting to me about it is, even though it is still Washington City Paper and some things are the same, a lot is really different and it's a very different organization that I'm taking over. It's a multi-platform media organization. I'm not one of these nostaglic people who's trapped in the Why Can't Everything Be Just Like It Was in 1984 kind of mentality. I'm really keen on making the paper, as well as the web site, as excellent as they can be."

Herewith, the official press release from company headquarters:

Washington City Paper Welcomes Noted Journalist Home As Editor

(April 26, 2010, Washington, DC) – Michael Schaffer, a DC native, best-selling author, and an editor and writer whose assignments have taken him from Afghanistan to Adams Morgan, has been named editor of the Washington City Paper.

City Paper Publisher Amy Austin, in announcing Schaffer's appointment, called attention to his previous experience in Washington, including three and a half years at the City Paper as a reporter and senior editor from 1997 to 2000.

"Michael honed his journalistic talent at City Paper and then went on to further develop his skills at US News & World Report and the Philadelphia Inquirer," Austin said. "We are so pleased to welcome him home as our editor."

As editor, Schaffer will have overall responsibility for the content of the Washington City Paper, one of the nation's best known urban weeklies, and its website. The City Paper was founded in 1981 as an alternative to the traditional press. It focuses its coverage on life and politics in the nation's capital.

Last year, Schaffer's first book, "One Nation Under Dog," a critically acclaimed examination of America's mania for pets, was published by Henry Holt & Co. Schaffer spent two years on the project, which combines investigative reporting, narrative journalism, and cultural history.

Previously, Schaffer spent four years as a reporter at the Philadelphia Inquirer. In addition to coverage of local politics and corruption, he covered the 2004 Presidential election and spent time in Iraq. Knight-Ridder Newspapers recognized his Iraq coverage with the James K. Batten Excellence Award in 2003

Schaffer joined the Inquirer from US News, where he served on the national and world news staff from 2000 to 2002. He was dispatched to Pakistan for the fall of 2001, and also reported from a dozen US states, covering the 2000 Florida recount, poverty issues, and scandals in the Catholic Church.

Schaffer's freelance work has appeared in Slate, The New Republic, The Daily Beast, The Washington Monthly, The Washington Post, The Boston Globe, New York Press, Obituary Magazine, Philadelphia, and Men's Journal.

"I grew up reading City Paper, and later got my first job in journalism there," Schaffer said. "Back then, we printed a paper weekly; now, we also update a website 24/7. I'm incredibly excited about tackling the new media landscape while using the values I learned here at the start of my career: Curiosity, fearlessness, humor, and a deep knowledge of the city we call home."

###

Washington City Paper is one of six of America's leading urban weeklies owned by CL Inc. The group also includes the Chicago Reader, Creative Loafing Atlanta, Creative Loafing Tampa, Creative Loafing Charlotte, and Creative Loafing Sarasota. CL Inc.'s holdings also include websites associated with those newspaper properties, the Straight Dope (straightdope.com) and Listen.com sites, and the Digital Advertising Network.

Photo by Ryan Donnell

The real cause of the anger with Ms. Rhee is her assault on the entrenched special interests that helped make District schools a national disgrace. How else to explain the extraordinary efforts of the American Federation of Teachers to demonize her? How else to interpret the total lack of interest among Ms. Rhee's critics on the council in hearing her examples of some of the bad teachers who were terminated as a result of the reduction in force? Why hasn't the council bothered to conduct a similar inquisition about the 2,500 other city workers who have lost their jobs in the past year?

Funny thing: The Post editorial board is about the only voice in town that can make you feel sorry for poor little Michelle.

The hallmark of a Robert McCartney column is care. Care not to push what the facts can justify. Care not to elbow anyone too hard. Care with grammar, syntax, and clarity. Yet in the lede of his latest column, about Rhee and the council, McCartney appears ready to throw care to the wind: "The future of the District's school system may well be decided by whether Chancellor Michelle A. Rhee's forceful reform campaign becomes mired in a swamp of her own self-defeating hubris."

Oooh, sounds like the columnist is gearing up for a slam! Well, no, turns out just a mild slap on the wrist: "At the hearing, Rhee was poised and even conciliatory at times. She also sounded self-righteous, though, especially in her repeated statements that she acts only in the interest of children. That maddened some council members, who said they, too, care about children first."

The analysis McCartney should be providing is something along the following lines: As she sits before the council, dutifully spouting talking points about conciliation and so on, Rhee is really just acting. It's been reported in these pages that Rhee told an audience that cooperation and consultation are "way overrated."

But when the progress on standardized testing plateaus, or just falters a bit, then Rhee will pay for her ways.

For the best stuff on all things Rhee, go to Loose Lips columnist Mike DeBonis.

Man, those Giants are stinking it up.

Credit the Barras Report for this great little look at a dispute in Ward 3 about out-of-boundary students. Barras is focusing on a movement that's apparently taking root in this well-to-do region, in which parents are urging that Ward 3 schools educate exclusively Ward 3 kids, signaling frustration with the system in which kids from other parts of the city commute in to get educated at these Ward 3 gems. One trouble with the Barras piece: She uses Hardy Middle School as a case in point, yet Hardy is squarely within the boundaries of Ward 2. Sure, it has some Ward 3 "feeder" schools, but still.

David Alprin had his anti-Dan Snyder artwork, or whatever you want to call the above paper plate thingee, confiscated at the gates of FedExField two weeks ago.

Alprin's a longtime Skins season ticketholder and was one of many fans who wanted to make a statement about the state of the franchise.

He'd stayed up late the night before the Tampa Bay game crafting dozens and dozens of his statement-makers. But then Snyder's jack-booted thugs, in the form of the yellow-jacketed FedExField security staff, threw Alprin's civil-disobedient plates in the garbage before letting him in the stadium.

But while Snyder killed the message, he didn't kill the messenger. And Alprin's going back for more of the same this weekend.

"I'm thinking about going stealth and bringing in pens, markers, etc.,  and making signs in the stadium either on paper we bring or the back of the drink caddies," he says.

He won't be alone.

More on the Prague Spring of Redskins fans to come.

***

(AFTER THE JUMP: Another installment of BogusHogetteGate? Really? Michelle Rhee thinks she's god? Really? Coat-tailing on Mike DeBonis' genius? Really? Melanie Oudin's coming to town with her mom, dad AND coach? Really? Snyder comes out on top in something? No way! Way?)

In case you missed any of the several dozen installments of BogusHogetteGate™ that have appeared in Cheap Seats Daily lately, here's a reprise, just to throw a bone to the inferiority complex ravaged print version.

The keeper for me is that along with being an unsanctioned Hogette who goes by Stephette Hogette, Brooklynite Steve Rasnikov is also a rapper who relies on his, um, flow to land the ladies at Redskins tailgates. The guy's a hoot, whether he knows it or not.

All the clowns in this circus will be at FedExField on Sunday.

Here's hoping it gets uglier!

***

Back to real news: In case you missed it: Amazin' Mike DeBonis' latest and greatest find proves that Michelle Rhee not only runs the city, she runs the media, too.

We all already suspected she ran everything, right? The megalomania in the email DeBonis uncovered from the schools Chancellor — yeah, even Rhee's title is obnoxious — meshes with her behavior throughout my limited and 100-percent-frustrating dealings with DC Public Schools.

Several weeks ago I was trying to deal with Rhee's office about her handling of last year's Dunbar/Fort Hill racial incident.

It had been about a year since Dunbar coach Craig Jefferies pulled his team off the field immediately after Dunbar was hit with three consecutive unsportsmanlike conduct penalties, which, based on visual evidence, all seem justified.

Afterwards, Jefferies said he took the drastic action not because of the ref's calls, but because players from host Fort Hill were using racial taunts, including the "N-word," on his team.

Suddenly, Dunbar/Fort Hill became a national story.

But while officials from Fort Hill and Allegany County, Md., cooperated in investigations from local, state and even federal agencies, Rhee's office impeded all investigations into Jefferies charges. Rhee ignored a request from the Maryland Public Secondary Schools Athletic Association, the group which governs high school sports in the state, to assist in its investigation of Jefferies’ allegations. MPSSAA had no choice but to award the game to Fort Hill as a forfeit.

Rhee also ignored a request from the U.S. Department of Justice for a written report on Dunbar's side of the story.

Rhee's refusal to cooperate with anybody in any way crushed the investigation: Because only one side, the Fort Hill side, was telling its story, the Department of Justice never released a written report that it told all parties it would be releasing.

With no report, everybody looks bad: The Fort Hill kids are left officially unexonerated, and Jefferies and the Dunbar coaches were left hanging with nobody and nothing to back up their side.

Rhee refused all recent requests from Washington City Paper to discuss any aspect of the Dunbar/Fort Hill situation, including her complete lack of cooperation with the federal government in what was, again, a national story.

She does talk to the press occasionally, of course. A cover story about Rhee from some journal called "Education Next" was linked on City Desk after DeBonis' gem. The story had a quote from Rhee as she was asked "to name her most significant achievement in her two years in Washington."

“We have begun—begun—begun—to establish a culture of accountability,” Rhee said.

The kids from Dunbar and Fort Hill know otherwise, Chancellor.

***

A little run in a major, and she's a star: Melanie Oudin, the macho/cute Georgian teen who upset three seeds in the latest U.S. Open, has just been announced as a headliner at this year's BCF Tennis Challenge, a long-running charity event founded more than 20 years ago by local girl made good Pam Shriver. The tourney is Dec. 9 at the First Mariner Arena in Baltimore.

Wonder if Melanie will bring her mom? Dad? Coach?

I feel dirty. But, heck, she's a star now. This is what we write about stars.

Tickets are now on sale.

***

Via DCRTV: A new round of numbers in the feud between WTEM and WJFK comes out, and for the first time Dan Snyder's sportstalker is on top: The latest Portable People Meter ratings, which counts the entire audience over 12 years old, have WTEM in 18th place in the market, and rival WJFK in 19th. WJFK would say, "Hey, we only count 25-54 year old males and we're doing fabulously with those guys!" To which I'd counter: "Absolutely! But can you let Dan Snyder win just one teensy little thing while the papers are saying everything else the guy's touched has gone to hell?"

As Loose Lips roamed the stone platform that is Freedom Plaza, he spied various D.C. politics stars of yesteryear. There was Kevin Chavous, the dashing former Ward 7 councilmember. And over there was Sandy Allen, the folksy former rep from Ward 8. And unmistakable in his Nats cap and bow tie was Anthony A. Williams. It was all enough to make this columnist expect a showing by John Walker Lindh and a debate on the use of force in Iraq—all so 2002!

The blast from seven years ago congregated at Freedom Plaza to boost a rally in favor of renewing the endangered D.C. school voucher program. Williams, who served as mayor of the District from 1999 to 2007, threw the whole weight of his formermayordom behind the voucher cause: "Really, the long-term prospects of our city are a solid education for our kids," said Williams. "We can't fix our schools overnight and I think parents ought to have an option."

As things currently stand, federal funding for the D.C. voucher program, which helps fund private educational options for about 1,700 D.C. kids, appears ready to expire in 2010, unless the feds change course. That's what Williams and Chavous and Allen were pushing for. When asked if he thought local funding should replace the federal commitment—as has been persuasively suggested by Washington Post columnist Colbert I. King—Williams said this: "I would personally think so, but we ought to get to that road when we get to it. Right now we don't have that choice because the federal government is deciding [whether] to fund the program."

Since leaving office nearly two-and-a-half years ago, Williams has maintained the lowest of profiles, agreeing to be interviewed about his first home purchase in the District, and about his job as something of an investment banker, but otherwise steering clear of the municipal issues that wore him down over eight years. A post-rally scrum with reporters was the first time that Williams had stood before reporters and addressed those issues.

When asked about his successor, Adrian M. Fenty, Williams responded, "I've made a religious effort to stay out of his way. It's easy because 99.66 of what he's doing, I agree with." That remaining .33 appears to cover vouchers, a topic on which the current mayor has been almost officially lukewarm.

From there, Williams repeated the sort of claptrap that came to define his weekly Wednesday press conferences. On his ability to work the levers of government, Williams waxed nostalgic about his relationship with former D.C. Council Chairman Linda W. Cropp. "I felt like I got into a roll with the council, actually. When I went to things with them, there was a lot of friction but a lot got done," said the former mayor. "Linda and I worked at our relationship. Obviously there was a lot of commotion and animostiy at times. When you're mayor of the city...you're the crab on top of the bucket and everyone wants to pull you down. So i understand the friction, the competition. But, you know, you can make it work."

The ever-cautious Williams, however, did stray from the script once, when asked directly about mayoral-council tensions. He went off on a tangent and answered one of the central criticisms of his mayoralty: "If I had to do it all over again, I would have taken less trips. I would have trimmed back a lot of stuff," he said.

On a more contemporary note, Williams said that his work as an investment banker for cities with Primum Public Realty Trust is in "transition" thanks to the economic crisis. "My little pizza stand got hit by the hurricane," he said.

Photo by Darrow Montgomery