Full trailer will debut ahead of Bandslam, opening Friday. Until then, squeal accordingly:

Those of you who care surely already know, but those who don't might want to avoid certain retail locations once the sun goes down tonight.

Twilight, that suckalicious sparkling-vampire movie starring Robert Pattinson (eeeee!) and Kristen Stewart (Bella!), is out on DVD tomorrow. But it's not any ol' DVD release: It's a two-disc Special Edition DVD, and it's going on sale in just less than 12 hours, complete with parties at Borders, Walmart, and Blockbuster locations across the country officially starting at 10 p.m.

Certainly, though, the lines will form much, much earlier. Especially considering that the Twilight folks have not only promised plenty o' giveaways, but "Twilight actors and filmmakers will be making surprise appearances at select locations throughout the country!"

And if those facts don't make you faint, you'll certain need a splash of water to the face and a cookie if you decide to give plasma at one of the blood drives select Walmarts will host. It's unclear whether the Clinton, Md., store -- apparently the only Walmart throwing a Twilight party -- will be participating.

For more information and to find the location of the nearest screechfest, go to twilightthemovie.com.

In an interview with Nylon, Twilight star Kristen Stewart twice referred to her experiences since becoming involved with the franchise as "psychotic situations."

Stewart was particularly blunt about Twilight's publicity tour: "You get a slew of all these bullshit questions like, 'What’s it like to kiss a vampire?' and 'How much do you love Robert?' Then you’ll get one that’s actually real, but you’re like, 'No, I can’t right now, I can’t even consider [it].'"

Maybe by the time production for Eclipse rolls around, Who Will Play Jacob? will turn into Who Will Play Bella? Better start keeping your craziness to yourselves, people!

Start lining up outside Borders now: Twilight will be released in a special, 2,394-hour DVD Special Edition on March 21.

Surely, Amazon's preorders are already through the roof. If you haven't heard the details yet, the package will be "packed with bonus features that are sure to please even the most hardcore Twilighter.

"They include extended and deleted scenes, three music videos, a commentary with director Catherine Hardwicke, Robert Pattinson, and Kristen Stewart, a featurette on the "Comic-Con Phenomenon" and an in-depth, seven-part documentary, The Adventure Begins: The Journey from Page to Screen, that takes the fan through each step of the film-making process."

A seven-part doc! That should appease even the most ardent Twihards. (Yeah, I said it.)

After this post, I'm totally shutting up about Twilight. (Unless, of course, Taylor Lautner's not invited back to reprise his squeal-inducing role as Jacob Black in the sequel, which would be the biggest news ever.)

But I had to say something about Robert Pattinson's recent remark to OK! magazine about why he's not looking forward to filming the franchise's next installment, New Moon. Pattinson claimed that his lifeless-in-a-bad-way performance as hottie vampire Edward Cullen was marred because of..contact lenses.

"Wearing coloured contact lenses... It was like I constantly had sand in my eyes. I was wearing them for three months constantly and my eyes never ever accepted them! It took me 20 minutes per eye every single day and I ended up having to literally fold it into my eyeball."

And the star believes the dreaded lenses may inhibit his acting skills - because he couldn't properly portray his character's emotions due to the "two orange blobs" in his eyes.

He adds, "It was frustrating as well because normally your eyes are saying something, but if you've got two orange blobs in your face it's so annoying!

"The director (Catherine Hardwicke) would say, 'Look at her (Kristen Stewart) like you love her,' and I'd be like, 'I'm trying!'"

Oh Robert, that explains everything. Now what's the rest of the cast's excuse?

...and apparently no one else can, either, I offer you: The Twilight Before Christmas.

An actor faces a lot of pressure when tapped to embody a beloved fictional character. But try living up to fan expectations when the author who birthed said character describes him as “devastatingly, inhumanly beautiful,” with a “musical voice” and “soft, enchanting laugh.”

Those adjectives -- along with many, many others that reiterate his perfection -- add up to Edward Cullen, the heartthrob teenage vampire who helped Stephenie Meyer's Twilight series become exalted as “the next Harry Potter.” Which would be accurate, if only the novels were better written. And the stories appealed to boys as well as giggly girls (albeit of all ages, apparently). And -- most crucial -- if the franchise's inaugural big-screen adaptation by director Catherine Hardwicke didn't suck more than its vampires actually do.

Read More "Review: “Twilight”" »