Historically Accurate: Everyone's talking about Swampoodle—the neighborhood and the play co-produced by Ireland's The Performance Corporation and D.C.'s Solas Nua at the Uline Arena. Frozen Tropics has put up several posts on the subject, and recently linked to DCist's review (you can find City Paper's own here, if you're so inclined.) The Hill is Home wrote a few words, and the NoMa blog has a charming little history of the neighborhood as it relates to the play. (Bonus! There's a scan of someone's old diary.)

Not Molly: From a highly concerned member of the ANC 6A email list came this broadcast on Tuesday morning: "The cutest little dog is at the Kentucky Avenue Safeway right now. She's clearly lost, and wet from the rain last night. She keeps trying to get in the store and they keep shooing her out. She is a small terrier type dog, salt and pepper fur, faded pink collar and a faded striped flea collar too. She is very affectionate and immediately came to me when I called. She tried to get in my car and if I didn't have to go into the office today, I'd bring her home! I hope someone claims her soon. I think the security guard is probably going to call the shelter." There's been no word on whether the dog made it to a good home.

Pour One Out: In a roundup of neighborhood updates, coverage, and events in Near Southeast, JDLand included notice of a "community cookout" to be held by Harry's Reserve Wine and Spirits, which will include "free 'high-end' beverage tastings in addition to grilled offerings. The owners also want to pass along that they're getting fresh shipments of a variety of cheeses this week, and that they now have 800 beers in stock." One commenter takes offense to the use of "high-end," squawking, "For the love of all that is holy, will you stop referring to these beverage tastings as 'high-end?' What else are they gonna be? Low-end servings of Colt 45? It's like you and the liquor store are deathly afraid of being accused of contributing to the return of the unwanted folk. Just stop it already." But JD steps in with an important grammatical clarification: "It's in quotes. I am quoting what they're calling it, and in fact put in quote marks to specifically make clear that that's *not* what I'm calling it. But I'd be happy to buy you a Colt 45 if it would lessen the stress and strain you're obviously feeling."

Send a Signal: From the Petworth email list comes this friendly request: "Dear neighbors, I'm conducting a survey of the bat population of Petworth.  Have any of you had problems with a bat roost in your house?  Have any of you noticed bats living in the neighborhood?  If so, I'd like to talk to you."

We Won't Go: JDLand continues with diligent updates on Near Southeast's fight to stay in Ward 6. A band of concerned residents has been laying it on thick, asking elected officials to leave them out of the redistricting process. From JDLand's extensive coverage: "...The ANC quickly voted unanimously to support the resolution to keep all of 6D in Ward 6. Near Southeast commissioner David Garber has been tweeting his visit to the Wilson Building today to deliver the resolution and a 200-plus-signature petition, saying that Jim Graham told him that Near Southeast is 'not in play' and that Mary Cheh's office assured him that 'she supports keeping Near Southeast in Ward 6.' (Cheh had made this known last week, when she told Tommy Wells to make the calls from concerned Near Southeast residents stop.)"

Angry Neighbors: A screed on The Hill is Home entitled "Don't Call My Neighborhood Ghetto!" has inspired fits of comments on just how visitors to Capitol Hill should be treated. The post details an encounter with a rude visitor with Maryland license plates (in a BMW, no less), and though commenters agree that "ghetto" shouldn't be used to describe Capitol Hill, there is dissent on the behavior of the author of the post. One commenter says, "This writing is tinged with the very resentment that is poisoning parts of Capitol Hill. The neighborhood is changing and screaming out of your window at drunk idiots in BMWs isn’t going to solve anything. Everyone on the Hill seems to have earned a masters degree in complaining but failed their course on problem solving. Rather than airing your displeasure and chastizing someone for using the word ghetto, perhaps youshould be happy that the girl was leaving the neighborhood rather than coming home to the neighborhood. It was rude of her to say, but I really don’t see the point in writing about it. It accomplishes nothing and just makes you sound, well, angry."

An Englishman in LeDroit Park, Update: Left for LeDroit covers Prince Charles' visit to the neighborhood with a slideshow of photographs. The prince appeared to enjoy himself.

Brookland, ISO: "I'm trying to find three white mens' lab coats (L or XL), preferably used. Anyone have any suggestions for where I might find them? I've just checked out five different large thrift stores and didn't find any," writes one member of the Brookland email list. Another has an almost, but not quite, useful suggestion: "Try the Thrift Store on South Dakota Ave NE..near the NY Ave ramp....i took a white lab coat there on Saturday (5/7)...the size, I believe, was XL." (Word to the wise: When Washington City Paper bought lab coats for a video, we found some at Jimmie Muscatello's Uniform Center on Rhode Island Avenue NE.)

Cleveland Park Problems: "We live in McLean Gardens and we are having such a difficult time with out 900 Mhz baby monitor. We get a sporadic, static popping noise that forces us to turn it off in the middle of the night. We have confirmed that no other devices in our house run at this frequency and we've turned off our cell phones, but we can not get a single night pop-free! We also bought another monitor and have the same problem, so it's not a device defect. Has anyone else encountered this problem? Does anyone have a suggestion?" inquires one member of the Cleveland Park email list. At this time, no one has offered any suggestions, though perhaps it's appropriate to blame the excessive rumbling of trucks in nearby Tenleytown.

Parakeets of Palisades: A thread on the Palisades email list, entitled "parakeet found after fleeing airplane noise!" details the story of one small bird who alighted to the east. A Craigslist posting brought the pet home—"He made it all the way to Columbia Heights and landed on a friendly shoulder. Our posting on craigslist took care of the rest. He's tired and hungry but otherwise fine. Thanks for your help!" writes, presumably, the bird's owner—but one neighborhood resident is on a mission to eradicate the overwhelming airplane noise (it's probably a quality-of-life issue for humans, too): "And if the sensitive parakeet was fleeing aircraft noise in the Palisades; relief may be on the way. Stay tuned for developments."

We Won't Go II: JDLand has the most comprehensive review to date of Near Southeast's fight to stay in Ward 6 following a meeting of residents. Councilmember Tommy Wells was present with a list of things the neighborhood could do to lobby for its continued existence in Ward 6, which included: "...Arguments against a move to Ward 8 move should not center on 'personalities.' That concept was not really expanded upon but, if you've read the comments on my post last week on this issue, you might infer it to mean 'don't rant about how you don't want Marion Barry as your councilmember.' Wells also said to not mention not being able to park elsewhere in Ward 6 as a reason for opposition, which did seem to come up an awful lot at last week's hearings, to the dismay of many in the DC Twitterverse. 'This is about how you view your community.'" Commenters have a very hard time staying away from those "personalities," though. Writes one, "I know its an argument that Wells and Garber told us to shy away from – but I find it extremely suspect that the man who says he wants to 'stop gentrification' and "keep the city black" is attempting to take over one of the fastest-gentrifying, fastest-whitening precincts in the District... and choke it in its crib." Stay tuned for updates from last night's formal meeting on redistricting.

Mount Vernon Archives: A reader of The Triangle digs up an undated "Year 2000 Neighborhood Map originally created by Jonathan Passonneau and Partners" for the blog. A commenter points out some differences since the map was created, observing "interesting! A few of the changes I note are: 1. There’s no office building at the NW corner of 7th and I, thus exposing the tech world plaza. 2. The building between 5th and 6th across from where CityVista is now is no more. 3. Former street grid where the convention center is now… and so on and so forth. very cool!" The reader who initially submitted the map adds, "Yeah, it was like finding a little treasure as I was cleaning out my office. It’s not just our neighborhood either – the entire NOMA, Shaw and NE SE areas are comprised of just empty blocks. Quite stark."

For the Birds, III: Last week in Brookland, it was hummingbirds. This week, the neighborhood email list is chattering about robins—and, more specifically, how to kindly relocate them, without displacing them entirely. (Perhaps a metaphor for D.C.'s demographic growing pains can be found amongst its fauna.) Writes one member, "So, we had two robin families nest in our yard last year. They were a joy to watch. This year, they have decided to nest directly outside our french doors going onto the deck on top of flood lights. It's just a lousy place for them and I fear that they will get quite edgy once the eggs are there with all the in and out from the door. I've already pulled the hay down once, but it's back again. Any nice way to make that spot not so attractive to them? Would hate for them to go away completely, but it's just the worst spot for them and us." Insofar, neighbors only have words of support: "We had a similar siuation with birds nesting in our porch at the tops of brick columns. 'Cute' was our initial reaction, too, until the poop started dripping down the columns... : ( It was really hard to clean off, too."

All Clear for Capitalism: JDLand reports that the Historic Preservation Review Board has recommended that the Market Deli in Near Southeast not be designated historic by the board, or by the National Register of Historic Places. The nomination of the building, aided by ANC 6D07 commissioner David Garber, was not favorably received by the neighborhood, and commenters have cheered the HPRB's decision. One snarks, "So....anyone have any guesses or rumors as to which 'landmark' will be next in line to try and be saved? Will it be the former theater (taxi repair shop on Half St) or the transfer station/stacks?" More congratulatory is another, who says, "Well this is a pleasant surprise. I thought there was a good chance that HPRB was going to support the designation based on some past decisions (ie the old, dilapidated wood shack in perpetual existence at 12th & E SE – sorry I mean 'shotgun' house). Thank goodness the Capitol Hill Restoration Society has no interest in our neighborhood." And, finally: "I fully support the destruction of the Market Deli to advance the bottom line of real estate and surrounding property value."

Beware the Umbrellas: A thread on the Palisades email list is rife with warnings of a potential door-to-door scam. Writes one member, "I had 2 young women soliciting saying they were from UVA doing a communications gig and turns out it is magazines they are selling. Very pushy. They don't want you to buy magazines for them but for wounded soldiers at Walter Reed. Very suspect." Another describes potential tactics of the alleged scammers, adding, "Same here – the two guys who came to my door claimed they'd send the magazines to Veterans' hospitals and gave me a grimy list of hospitals. Set off my suspicions too. They also asked for an umbrella – the police officer who attended later said he'd seen around five people gathered together nearby, whom he thought responsible for the door knocking, all already had umbrellas – he thought the request for an umbrella was simply to get the front door open further to check out the place."

Cleveland Park Problems: Writes one member of the Cleveland Park email list, "Our water has had a smell like burning plastic since yesterday. It is removed by our Brita filter, but still worrisome. Is anyone else experiencing this?" Another adds, "Yes, we smell it too. Our showers stink." No answer to this mystery has been established.

Just in Time for Free Cone Day: Even though Georgetown University and its neighbors can't get their acts together to establish an easy and coherent process for the university's campus plan, there's one recent plus for local neighborhood development: The Georgetown Metropolitan reports that the Ice Cream No-Man's Land (click through for a map) is no more! "If you are at Wisconsin and O St., you have to walk over a block and a half to find an ice cream shop. Well that awful situation is about to come to an end: IceBerry is opening a second shop where Originals just closed (1332 Wisconsin Ave.)"

No Country for Young Hipsters: Frozen Tropics reports that somewhere, someone is planning a sitcom based in everyone's favorite up-and-coming neighborhood (that would be the H Street NE corridor...or the Atlas District) and observes, "Notable fact: there appears to be no hipster character." The open casting call—with character descriptions like, "Mitch is a young Republican working on the hill as low-level staff. He is from Tennessee with natural wit. Generally wears bow-ties. Can be abrasive with others because he ‘speaks his mind’ and is not ashamed to do so. He knows what the world needs...a Republican president"—can be found here. Frozen Tropics commenters are skeptical. One says, "I doubt that'll get picked up. The DC stereotypes are rather nauseating, I'm guessing H St will get moved closer to the Capitol too," while another thinks, "they made the right move not casting a hipster. Can you imagine having to work with them on a project like this? Trying to direct/teach a whole cast of sticky rice staff types?"

Legally, This Place Could Matter: JDLand has all the details on last night's ANC 6D meeting, where the commission voted 5-0-2 to support the historic designation of the Market Deli building; it falls under the purview of Akridge, the company that owns the building's lot. The structure has been discussed at length on JDLand before ("If you're just joining us, this nomination has already sparked some pretty, ahem, spirited debate. You can see the application, along with the HPRB hearing notice, and read about the city's landmark designation process"), due in some part to its connections to 6D07 commissioner David Garber, who submitted a historic designation nomination for the building. As expected, Akridge was opposed, but didn't come armed well enough to make a case to the ANC: "Commissioner Roger Moffatt was unhappy that the Akridge rep didn't bring any copies of these reports, and Garber was skeptical that they existed at all (referring to "these supposed reports"). Commissioner Andy Litsky felt that if these reports are available, the ANC should be able to study them in order to have more information before taking a vote that would throw the fabled great weight of the commission behind the application."

Tourists vs. Residents: The Triangle follows up on the Post's reporting that the Carnegie Building (that regal, classical structure on Mount Vernon Square) could become a visitor's center. Though it's not a bad use of the space, The Triangle doesn't seem to think that it's the best: "On the surface this sounds like an upgrade as it would bring more life to the square than the status quo. However this is less ambitious than the priority recommendations the Office of Planning devised during the initial phase of the Mount Vernon Square District project. Those priority recommendations included a restaurant with outdoor seating and flexible event space." The blog's commenters agree that a visitor's center would need to be more than, well, just a visitor's center. "A big F A I L goes to the person who thought of using this for the DC Visitor’s Center. This is a neighborhood & needs to benefit the residents, the people that live here day in & day out. With a hoppin’ local vibe in the square, it will inevetably attract tourists (like Dupont Circle does), which it terrific – BUT – this grand building & park deserve MUCH more than this weak concept. All MV Square needs is a cluster**** of tour busses," writes one. Another is equally skeptical, noting "I envision a “visitor’s center” as being a relatively small space with a few volunteers armed with maps and an impressive knowledge of local restaurants and tourist attractions, possibly with some kind of scale model of the neighborhood under a glass case. It’s hard to imagine a visitor’s center filling the entire Carnegie building, so hopefully we’ll still get a restaurant or other local attraction in addition to the visitor’s center."

Yesterday, the Washington Post printed some very obvious news to anyone who's been on South Cap. Street in the past year: Nationals Park hasn't sparked much revitalizing in Southwest. The city spent $1 billion in infrastructure upgrades and developers have made huge holes in the ground and left a lot of buildings still vacant.

As the article states, District residents weren't just sold a new stadium paid for with public dollars. No. As an old story noted, they were sold the "Stadium District"–a full-service community of new retail and new museums and new parks. The city hasn't come close to a Stadium District. Last week, Fisher wrote about the missing neighborhood as well.

What spilled forth in Sunday's A1 article was a lot of excuse making on the part of city officials and developers.

My favorite:

"It just so happens that implementation is occurring during the worst economic downturn in recent history. So things are going to struggle a little bit," said Neil O. Albert, the District's deputy mayor for economic development.

Really? This effort had been planned for years–long before the recession and banking collapse. The reasons Nationals Park hasn't revitalized the neighborhood are too numerous. But let me try.

*The city took too long fighting and underestimating the old tenants they had to boot to make way for the stadium. There is still a lot of concern over stadium funding and revenue from the games. Councilmember David Catania has said that the city's financial wiz Natwar Gandhi has been basically wrong on everything concerning stadium-related money. As LL reported (in the above link):

"Catania says he has no faith in the latest ballpark numbers—an attitude, he says, informed by history. 'Tell me one thing [Gandhi]’s been right on,' he says. 'He’s been wrong on attendance, wrong on revenue, wrong on environmental remediation, wrong on land.'"

*The city and the Nationals spent most of last season fussing with vendors. So while there were plenty of vacant spaces, vendors fought the city and the team over where they can set up shop and how many could set up shop. This fight dragged on and on and only ended up hurting the one group of people who seemed ready and willing to set up shop near the ballpark. The vendor fight went all the way to D.C. Superior Court.

*The stadium's construction hurt a lot of older tenants when it came to higher property taxes, etc. While new buildings went up without tenants, the old ones got squeezed. One new apartment building wasted a lot of goodwill over a battle with its tenants. The fight was over parking spaces in its garage.

*In March 2007, the Lerners completed construction on a building at 20 M Street SE. After two years, they only have one tenant. Long before the economy collapsed, they couldn't fill their own building.

*The Lerners are trying to make Peter Angelos look good. The Nats owners wasted their first season in the new ballpark refusing to pay rent on the ugly thing. Meanwhile, they fielded a crummy team. At a time when people were just starting to talk about this season, the Nats GM Jim Bowden resigned over allegations of skimming from contract bonus of Latin American players.

*Even the Post's critic hated the stadium's look.

*Nationals Park made history as one of the worst attended new stadiums ever.

*The Lerners and private companies built way too many parking lots.

*The city depended on private developers to pay for other projects. When the private development started failing, projects got stalled.

*Last year, I wrote a silly little blog item wondering about how housing prices could be so high just because the homes were located near Nationals Park. I noted that the surrounding area hadn't quite developed:

"The neighborhood surrounding the ballpark hasn’t changed all that much. It’s still mechanic shops and liquor stores. Aside from the ballpark, the new amenities include a Subway sandwich shop, a Starbucks, and a Five Guys. Those things are all great. Who doesn’t want to eat fresh? Who doesn’t like a super strong cup of coffee? Who can’t resist a juicy burger? But still–$579,000 for a town house?"

I was hammered by Matthew Yglesias for being short-sighted. Looks like I turned out to be right. A Five Guys and a Starbucks still doesn't mean economic development. And a future of skyline of yuppie Lofts is not happening in the near future. What scares me is supposed liberals like Yglesias and neighborhood boosters like JDland are really pining for those Lofts.

JDLand has a personal stake in the revitalization of the neighborhood. It drives traffic to her blog. It makes her feel better. Whatever. JDLand's blog is practically an ad for these new Loft and premo apartment towers. I wonder if she's ever noted the displacement of all those low-income tenants from Arthur Capper? I wonder if she cares what happens to the residents of James Creek who live directly across from the stadium?

So far the discussion concerning the ballpark is all about: when are those lofts coming, when will they be filled with tenants? I hope the discussion turns into a broader one that includes not just the new tenants but the displaced tenants as well. And all the ones that feel left behind to deal with all those empty lots.

*photo by Darrow Montgomery.