If there's one thing we all learned from the Grammys' star-studded death rattle, it's that award shows which attempt to program the tastes of the nation are on their way out. (How many of your friends actually agreed that Coldplay's Viva la Vida was the best rock album of the year?)

So the fact that this Sunday's 81st Annual Academy Awards has crept up with little to no hype is hardly surprising, nor is the fact that the Academy singled out David Fincher's (of Fight Club fame) The Curious Case of Benjamin Button as the Academy Awards' Viva la Vida, bestowing upon the bloated F. Scott Fitzgerald adaptation a mind boggling 13 nominations.

Read More "The “Curious Case” of Oscar Hype" »

I missed the SAG Awards last night -- allegedly the most appreciated among dog-and-pony shows because the winners are chosen by other actors -- but a quick scan of the recipients reveals no surprises. Slumdog, of course. Meryl Streep, yawn.

This afternoon, though, I received a press release announcing the picks of a group Sean Penn may start caring about in another year: AARP, whose magazine's editorial staff votes on what they somewhat condescendingly call the Movies for Grownups Awards.
Read More "Forget the Screen Actors Guild. What Does AARP Think?" »