Full trailer will debut ahead of Bandslam, opening Friday. Until then, squeal accordingly:

After this post, I'm totally shutting up about Twilight. (Unless, of course, Taylor Lautner's not invited back to reprise his squeal-inducing role as Jacob Black in the sequel, which would be the biggest news ever.)

But I had to say something about Robert Pattinson's recent remark to OK! magazine about why he's not looking forward to filming the franchise's next installment, New Moon. Pattinson claimed that his lifeless-in-a-bad-way performance as hottie vampire Edward Cullen was marred because of..contact lenses.

"Wearing coloured contact lenses... It was like I constantly had sand in my eyes. I was wearing them for three months constantly and my eyes never ever accepted them! It took me 20 minutes per eye every single day and I ended up having to literally fold it into my eyeball."

And the star believes the dreaded lenses may inhibit his acting skills - because he couldn't properly portray his character's emotions due to the "two orange blobs" in his eyes.

He adds, "It was frustrating as well because normally your eyes are saying something, but if you've got two orange blobs in your face it's so annoying!

"The director (Catherine Hardwicke) would say, 'Look at her (Kristen Stewart) like you love her,' and I'd be like, 'I'm trying!'"

Oh Robert, that explains everything. Now what's the rest of the cast's excuse?

And other equally vapid questions answered by yours truly and the Sexist's Amanda Hess in this week's Five Minutes You'll Never Get Back. Head on over to gender land to check out our Twilight-centric podcast.