Yellow Line to the Urinal: Metro has a series of advertising posters up in stations taking thinly veiled potshots at the New York subway, featuring large photos of rats and saying that unlike "some" subway systems, D.C.'s doesn't have lots of vermin because our system is nice and clean. But if WMATA officials have plans to put up posters mocking other cities for urine, it's time to cancel them: An inspector general's report says train operators are using the "pocket tracks" where trains can reverse direction at Mt. Vernon Square, Southern Avenue, and Grosvenor as lavatories. Remember: Don't pee on the third rail. -4

Come On In, the Water's Fine: Chalk this one up as the first win of the Gray administration? The Wilson Aquatic Center was scheduled to be closed from last Wednesday until tomorrow to repair the water-heating system at the pool. Repairs were completed early, though, and the center reopened today. We look forward to receiving mailings in four years from Vince Gray's re-election campaign touting his stewardship of the quick repair of the pool. +1

Get Used to Shivering: A few months ago, weather forecasters declared this winter would be a mild one for the D.C. area. Now that winter has actually started, and brought with it an unending spate of abnormally cold days, they've decided that might not be right. The revised word is that the cold weather that settled into the region last month will continue until, well, basically until the spring. Feel free to burn meteorological textbooks to stay warm. -2

And Thus Ends, Mercifully, the 2010 Washington Redskins Season: Some features of this year's edition of the NFL were entirely predictable. Back in early September, for instance, we said the Redskins would finish the year 6-10, even though they'd just opened with a win. Lo and behold, by losing to the Giants yesterday, the team did exactly that. The path to that 6-10 record, of course, was unforeseeable, except maybe for fans of Rex "Sexy Rexy" Grossman who kept Donovan McNabb voodoo dolls handy. The good news? The Redskins won two more games than last year. The bad news? Even playing in the NFC West, where the division "winners" were the 7-9 Seattle Seahawks, the team would have missed the playoffs. Wait 'til next year! -3

Thursday's Needle rating: 73 Today's score: -8 Today's Needle rating: 65

Every time it snows here I get ready–make sure I have ice melt, find the snow shovels in the basement, check air pressure in car tires. I also brace myself for a boatload of superior twaddle from people who are originally from colder climes. You know who they are. Hell, I'm friends with some of them. No matter how cold it is, they insist it isn't cold. And God forbid it should snow. You call this snow? they'll ask without waiting for you to answer (and the answer is: yes).

Now even Jesus the new president is in on it. Hey Admiral Byrd and Co., here's why school is canceled. My street isn't clear. It's not a main street, but there are many streets like it. I'm excellent at driving in snow and couldn't get my front-wheel drive car up the hill and out of the nabe yesterday. This area doesn't have enough snow-removal equipment to clear the streets quickly enough. Where cars can't go, buses can't either. Please snicker and hold your now-that-was-a-real-snow-day nostalgia parties out of earshot of the rest of us.

*FULL DISCLOSURE: My parents live in Sault Ste. Marie, Mich.