Having learned the other day there's a new and improved edition of Darwin's Origin of Species being given away to college students next month - for free! - by a creationist group seeking to point out "Darwin’s racism," "his disdain for women," and Adolf Hitler’s "undeniable connection with the theory," I had to find out: Will the book be coming to a campus near you?

Read More "Is the Cult Version of Origin of Species Coming to a Campus Near You? It’s a Secret!" »

Each Sunday at my home is homemade pizza night. This past week, a family member asked for an unorthodox topping.

Yum?

The problem with "jumping the shark" is not that the phrase itself has "jumped the shark." It's not that the possibility of one's own shark-jumping can lead to excellent blogging. It's that once one has "jumped the shark" (beggared its cultural capital) there is no mention of where the shark-jumper completes his, her, or its arc.

I have the answer. When something has well and truly jumped the shark, it lands...

...on a banana.

This is obviously a key cultural moment; I'd appreciate it if anyone who uses the phrase "jumps the shark and lands on a banana" would kindly link back to this post. If for no other reason than when a piece of fruit with a sticker that says "I CAN HAZ POTAZZEE-YUM" appears, my own cultural capital (which is measured in page views) will soar. And let's face it, "Dead Balls Era" is getting this blog nowhere.