Only three games into the young 2007–08 NHL regular season, the highly anticipated scoring race between the Pittsburgh Penguins’ baby-faced superstar Sidney Crosby and Washington Capitals depth defenseman John Erskine is already underway. It was expected that Crosby, the 5-foot-11, 193 lbs. franchise center drafted No. 1 overall in the 2005 NHL Entry Draft, and Erskine, the 6-foot-4, 215 lbs. enforcer drafted 39th overall in the 1998 draft, would be hot on each other’s heels all season. But Erskine—known more for his hard checks and pugilistic abilities—is already tearing up the score sheets. According to TSN.ca, through three games, Erskine—who is coming off a career best 2006–07 season (1-6-7)—has already picked up one goal and one assist for a whopping two points, which not only eclipses his NHL point totals for the entire 2000–01 (0-1-1), 2003–04 (0-1-1), and 2005–06 (1-0-1) seasons, but puts him on pace for an impressive 27-goal, 27-assist, 55-point season with a plus/minus rating of +82. Whoo-hoo! Way to go, John Erskine. NHL All-Star game, look out!

Poor “Secondary Sid,” (who earned his nickname after detractors noticed his penchant for being crediting with “phantom” secondary assists on goals he either wasn’t involved with or not even on the ice for), has only managed to pick up a lowly two assists so far—half of which, you guessed it, were secondary assists. Do the math, and it looks like Crosby is headed toward a career-worst 0-goal, 55-assist season with a plus/minus rating of -55. Ouch. What’s wrong, Sid?

The Scene: Third Floor of the new Harman Center for the Arts, the Shakespeare Theatre Company’s new glass-and-steel box directly across from the Verizon Center

The Occasion: Saturday night party for two people proclaiming their love, the first wedding held at what is destined to be one of the District’s great spaces for that sort of thing

Parties Involved: Myself, 12-year-old niece of the bride, excited Caps fan entering a cab after his team wiped the ice with the Carolina Hurricanes

The Incident: Caps fan drops trou and gives the full moon in full view of 12-year-old niece, who then waves at him

Money Quote from 12-Year-Old: “I think he smiled at me.”

Hey you, the guy with the white gloves whose sole job it is to handle the Stanley Cup: You might as well save yourself some time and drive that sweet silver beauty down to Washington, D.C., right now—before the puck drops in the Washington Capitals’ 2007-2008 season opener against the Atlanta Thrashers tonight. And I’m not talking about that piece-of-shit replica you guys keep at the Hockey Hall of Fame. I want the real deal, the oldest professional sports trophy in all of North America, which was first brought into the hockey world by Lord Stanley of Preston waaay back in 1892. In fact, why don’t you dig up old Stan, jolt him full of 1.21 gigawatts, and have his resurrected corpse hand-deliver the Cup—because my boys are gonna fucking rock the NHL this year. You just wait and see.

Wait, what the hell am I thinking? First off, Zombie Stanley would probably get lost along the way; by my count, the Cup’s only come to D.C. once, and that was when it was awarded to the Detroit Red Wings after they swept the Caps in the 1997-1998 finals. (May you forever burn in the firey pits of our Dark Lord’s domain, Esa Tikkanen.) Secondly, this is the Washington Capitals we’re talking about. It’s been so long since the organization has put anything other than a ragtag mix of inexperienced youngsters, career minor leaguers, European-league castoffs, and NHL journeymen on the ice that it’s near impossible to imagine the team even making the playoffs, let alone actually raising the Cup.

Yet, the team’s marked improvement—on paper, at least—has had many Caps fans feeling a strange tingling sensation during the months leading up to tonight’s game. Hope, is it called? If the Caps’ raised expectations has led to some mental and emotional confusion, it isn’t just among the team’s fans: The press doesn’t seem to know what make of the team, either.

Adam Proteau of The Hockey News has the Caps winning the Southeast Division; NHL.com’s John McGourty also shows the Caps plenty of love. ESPN’s Scott Burnside and Barry Melrose both pick the Caps as one of this year’s sleeper teams.

But their ESPN cohorts Joy Russo, E.J. “BJ for Sidney Crosby” Hradek, and perpetual clown John Buccigross see the Caps near the bottom of the Eastern Conference yet again. Sports Illustrated, which lists departed scrubs Kris Beech and Jiri Novotny as key losses, has them last in the division again. The New York Times‘ Lynn Zinser, meanwhile, lists goaltender Olaf “Olie the Goalie” Kolzig—the one player who has consistently performed admirably during the last few dark seasons—as the main reason why the team will fail.

With such a wide range of predictions surrounding the team, I can’t help but feel the need to add my own:

1. Alexander Ovechkin will break 100 points—possibly much more if/when…
2. Nicklas Backstrom, who will be starting the season at wing in order to get more acclimated to the NHL, shifts back to center midway through the season. The move will force coach Glen Hanlon to have either Backstrom or Michael Nylander center Ovechkin, thus…
3. Victor Kozlov will move back to the wing, where he looks much better.
4. Forward Dave Steckel will be a beast in the face-off circle, and lead the team in face-off percentage.
5. Defenseman Jeff Schultz will be shipped back to the Hershey Bears the moment Steve Eminger comes off the injured reserve list.
6. Alexander Semin will hit the 40-goal mark and continue to not learn English.
7. Posters on WashingtonCaps.com’s message boards will demand the trade of Brian Sutherby and Eminger, even if both were to have career years.
8. During a post-game press conference, Hanlon will refer to his own NHL goalie experience when explaining a game-time goaltending decision.
9. The Caps will make the playoffs.
10. The Caps will not make the playoffs.

And, as far as general predictions go, I say:

1. Sidney Crosby will cry about something.
2. Everyone in the Canadian press will be there to offer Crosby a tissue when he eventually cries about something.
3. The Caps will re-acquire Danius Zubrus and then, finally, trade him for Jan Hrdina.
4. Daniel Briere will spontaneously combust and I will applaud.
5. I will get punched in the face at Verizon Center by either a Philadelphia Flyers fan, a Pittsburgh Penguins fan, or a Buffalo Sabres fan.
6. The Stanley Cup will be awarded to the team that wins the Stanley Cup Finals.
7. I will eat at Subway at least two times next week. Eat Fresh.
8. It might rain this weekend.
9. I will find something not related to hockey to fill out these last predictions.
10. I will decide to go home early today.

You’ve got to feel for a guy like Jakub Klepis: After a stellar performance for the Hershey Bears in the 2006-2007 American Hockey League playoffs, the 23-year-old forward came into this year’s Washington Capitals training camp with no contract and very little hope of cracking the team’s 23-man roster. Klepis’ lackluster performance during the preseason gave the organization very little reason to offer him a new contract, yet it kept him around anyway—right up until it was time to take the team photograph.

At which point, as Tarik El-Bashir mentions in his blog, Klepis was told that he wouldn’t be needed for the photo.

You can only imagine poor Jake moping about in the corner like the fat kid who didn’t get chosen during a pick-up game and wondering “What the hell am I supposed to do now—go back to Europe?” while the rest of the guys who did make the team gathered around and showed their toothless smiles for the camera. I wonder how Klepis’ bosom buddy, winger Tomas Fleischmann—whose preseason performance did earn him a one-year, two-way contract worth just over the league minimum (as well as the opportunity to play alongside all-star left wing Alexander Ovechkin)—tried to console his pal? Perhaps “Flash” was too busy thanking his lucky stars that Ovechkin—instead of shooting the puck—passed it to him for what would become the Caps’ game-winning goal in the team’s 7-5 come-from-behind victory against the Philadelphia Flyers last Friday.

Outside of Fleischmann, center David Steckel was the only other Bears regular to land a job on the Caps’ forward ranks this season. The 6’5”, 215-pound Steckel earned his spot through his strong performance in the faceoff circle, dependable play on the penalty kill, and ability to chip in a couple of goals. Steckel’s presence on the roster will force Caps regulars Brian Sutherby, Matt Bradley, and Brooks Laich—all of whom will be competing with Steckel on a daily basis for fourth line duties—to push themselves a little harder if they want to avoid spending too many game nights in the press box.

The toughest break of the preseason went to Ben Clymer, the seven-year veteran and Stanley Cup-ring-wearing forward who—after signing a three year contract extension in July 2006—was demoted to the minor leagues on Monday. Clymer had a miserable season last year (due to an abdominal injury that plagued him up until the point he opted for a season-ending surgery) and came into this year’s camp questioning his future with the organization. However, he had been performing admirably during the preseason—arguably outperforming both Laich and Bradley—and the demotion does come as a bit of a surprise. Perhaps he was unhappy with his diminished role with the club? Or maybe the Caps’ coaching staff saw something in Laich and Bradley that most people didn’t. Unfortunately, either way, it’s likely that Clymer has played his last game with the Caps, for this season at least. If the organization was to call Clymer back up to the big leagues midway through the season, he would be subject to re-entry waivers, meaning any other team could pick him up at half the cost of his current salary (with the Caps responsible for the other half)—which, given his experience, grit, locker room presence, solid work ethic, and discounted price tag, some team would almost assuredly do.

As far as the defense goes, the Caps elected to keep both Mike Green and Jeff “Sarge” Schultz. Green’s outstanding performance during the preseason made it pretty much impossible for the organization to send him back to Hershey; Schultz, on the other hand, looked considerably less confident than he did during his stint with the team last year and still has plenty to learn on the AHL level, but was told to buy a house in town, because he’s staying. Tough guy defenseman John Erskine was also retained to add some toughness to the blueline; armchair GM’s favorite whipping boy and perennial trade candidate Steve Eminger—whose main problem continues to be consistency—will be joining forward prospect Eric Fehr on the injured reserve list due to a nagging injury. Once Eminger has healed, Schutlz will probably be headed back to Chocolatetown to keep the Caps’ roster under the 23-man limit.

Anyone who’s played the last two entries in EA Sports‘ popular NHL hockey video game franchise knows that—after facing stiff competition from rival game company 2K Sports—the EA designers have rededicated themselves to producing a game that, in addition to being a fun waste of time, is also a realistic simulation of the sport. Because, you know, when your slogan is “If It’s In the Game, It’s In the Game,” realism is kind of important.

Last year, EA Sports introduced the “Skill Stick,” which allowed players to cradle and shoot the puck using the right analogue stick, much like you would with an actual hockey stick. The Skill Stick was widely regarded as the most important innovation in hockey video games since EA’s NHL ‘93, in which players could spill each other’s blood on the ice during fights. (Unfortunately, the blood was absent from NHL ‘94.) This year, the designers introduced an advanced artificial-intelligence system, in which the computer learns your tendencies and adjusts its offensive and defensive strategies accordingly, as well as a create-a-play system that makes players on your own team react the way you want them to in certain situations.

But, as a poster at the Washington Caps’ message boards noticed earlier this week, the crack development team at Electronic Arts has apparently also put a renewed effort into ensuring that the player attributes, skills, and playing styles are as accurate as possible. Take, for instance, Sidney Crosby, who—during his first two seasons in the NHL—has often been accused of taking a dive to draw a penalty.

Special thanks to poster “Hollowboy” for relating this story and providing a link to the video.

Okay, so the other night I’m playing NHL08 on my Xbox360 as the Caps versus the Pens and early in the game I landed a hipcheck on Crosby from Pothier. My controller rumbled nicely to confirm this check. As I continued skating towards the Pens goal my controller kept rumbling every few seconds and I had no idea what was going on. I pulled up a replay and I when I focused on Crosby I see that after connecting with the initial check… he continued to flop on the ice in the other zone! I skated back to the zone and bumped him with Eminger and it “unfroze” his diving around on the ice. I couldn’t believe what I just witnessed so I grabbed my camera that can capture some video and I wanted to share with those who want to waste another 25 seconds of your time for a giggle. Sorry, it’s a little shaky and there’s no sound as I did a quick video capture of the replay.

The Washington Capitals weren’t kidding around when they announced “Change Is Coming” earlier this summer: When the Caps suit up for their home opener against the Carolina Hurricanes on Saturday, Oct. 6, a heavily upgraded roster featuring free-agent acquisitions such as Michael Nylander, Tom Poti, and Victor Kozlov will be hitting the ice—and in some fancy new uniforms to boot.

Off the ice, however, there’s going to be just as many changes going on at Verizon Center. One thing you can expect to see—well, actually, it’s pretty much impossible not to see—is the arena’s brand-spanking-new high-definition scoreboard, which I got to take a look at firsthand while attending the Caps’ preseason home opener on Tuesday night. As anyone who’s seen it will tell you, it’s a real beauty—although it is a bit disorienting to have the score, shot counter, and time clock on the top of the video screen (as opposed to on the bottom). The LED ribbon boards running around the upper level are pretty dazzling as well.

Another difference will, hopefully, be fewer loud, drunk, and rowdy fans from rival teams making the trip to Verizon Center. Anyone who’s ever attended a Caps game against the Pittsburgh Penguins or Philadelphia Flyers knows that it often feels as if there are more fans of the visiting team in the place than there are Caps fans. But, in the latest in a long line of creative ways the Caps’ sales staff has found to get affordable tickets in the hands of D.C.-area hockey fans, the organization is offering up three different “Pack the House” ticket packages. The six-game packages—all of which include a ticket to the Caps’ first home game—start at $99, and are broken down into an “Old Time Hockey Plan” (which features games against old Patrick Division foes such as the New York Islanders, New York Rangers, and New Jersey Devils), a “Saturday Night Game Plan” (I don’t really have to explain that one, do I?), and a “Rivals Plan,” which features both Caps/Pens games at Verizon Center. Buy the six-game package, and you get each ticket at a significant discount; individual tickets for each of those games are significantly more expensive than the regular gate price. So, yeah—suck it, Pennsylvania.

Of the three, I’m particularly stoked on the “Rivals Plan.” It’s bad enough getting heckled by a Pens fan at a home game when, say, the Caps blow a 4-0 lead and end up losing 5-4 in a shootout. But, to add injury to insult, at that very same game I had the distinct pleasure of being punched in the face by an upstanding member of the Penguins fan base while innocently waiting in line for the bathroom after the game. (Okay, so maybe I egged him on a little bit.) I greatly enjoy not being punched in the face at hockey games, and I am highly appreciative of the Caps’ sales staff’s efforts to provide me a punch-in-the-face-free experience at Verizon Center.

Please stop punching me in the face.

Sadly, the Rivals Plan doesn’t include a ticket for either of the Caps’ games against the Buffalo Sabres, as—among the Verizon Center faithful, at least—Sabres fans are often counted as one of the most obnoxious groups of fans in the NHL. (During last season’s Caps/Sabres matches, there were multiple reports of Buffalo fans threatening—and, in some cases, engaging in—physical violence against Caps fans. Maybe that’s the norm in Buffalo; D.C. is an admittedly a more docile crowd.) Of course, if I were some shit-talking, bandwagon Buffalo fan who had been proclaiming the Sabres Stanley Cup Champions since the beginning of the regular season only to see the team choke against the Ottawa Senators in the Eastern Conference Finals and then have its league-best offense completely decimated in the off-season due to free agency, well, I guess I’d be angry, too.

As I mentioned in an earlier blog post, members of the Washington Capitals’ Guest Services department have been trying to get me to re-up my two season tickets in Section 413 of the Verizon Center for the 2007–2008 campaign. They put forth a convincing argument for a long-time die-hard Caps fan such as myself: Discounted tickets, meet-the-team parties, various autographed memorabilia, a ticket-exchange program. Yet I remain on the fence—with my schedule, it is very likely that I would miss many of the games, and I have trouble enough as it is convincing people to go with me. (The sweet promise of a chicken tender basket only works so many times with my girlfriend.)

Several times in the last few weeks, I have received phone calls from my account representative, during which we’ve discussed my situation. Yesterday afternoon, however, upon seeing my rep’s phone number pop up once again on my ringing cell phone, I elected not to answer, as I was under a tight deadline. Oh, how I wish I had taken the time to answer that call. Because, this time, the Capitals were breaking out the big guns—literally.

They broke out defenseman Milan Jurcina.

Let me tell you about Jurcina: He’s a 6-foot-4-inch, 233-pound, 24-year-old defenseman who—after being acquired from the Boston Bruins for next to nothing in February—easily became one of the Caps’ most dependable and physical blueliners. (It’s not the first time General Manager George McPhee has fleeced Boston. During the 2003-2004 firesale, McPhee received defenseman Shaone Morrisonn—who has since become the Caps’ top defender—as well as a first and second round draft pick for power-play quarterback Sergei Gonchar; Gonchar would not re-sign with Boston following the 2003-2004 playoffs.) In his second season with the organization, Jurcina—drafted by Boston in the 8th round of the 2001 draft–had apparently fallen out of favor with first-year Bruins head coach Dave Lewis. McPhee obtained Jurcina for a fourth round draft pick; Lewis was later fired after only one year behind the bench.

The Czechoslovakian-born Jurcina is many things: He’s a steady defensive presence, he’s a hard hitter, and he’s quickly becoming a fan favorite in Washington. Jurcina is not, however, much of a salesman. Through a heavy accent, and in an eerily robotic voice, Jurcina addressed me personally, pleaded with me to help him, uh…do something (bring up attendance at the Verizon Center?), and asked that I give my account representative a call. (Of course, he gave me the wrong representative’s name, but I’m not going to hold that against the big guy.) He then thanked me for my support and expressed his extreme enthusiasm for the upcoming season with a monotone “Go Caaahhhps.”

At first, I figured it was only a pre-recorded message that someone within the organization had convinced poor Milan to do. On the weekly Caps Report podcast yesterday afternoon, however, WashingtonCaps.com Senior Writer Mike Vogel explained otherwise: “All the players are busy doing other things,” he said of his lack of guests for that afternoon’s show. “Namely, making cold calls. My sympathy to them.” Vogel went on to say that he suspected this promotion was a reaction to a very successful publicity stunt organized by none other than the Caps’ most-hated rivals, the Pittsburgh Penguins, who had superstar Sidney Crosby and a handful of his teammates hand deliver season-ticket packages to random subscribers. “If players are cold-calling fans, does that mean we’re going to have…ticket agents leading the breakout this year on the ice?,” Vogel lamented. “These guys do plenty, I don’t think they should have to get on the phone and sell tickets.”

I’d have to agree. The image of Jurcina in full gear, still sweaty from practice, sitting at a sales representative’s desk and calling up a list of former season-ticket holders in the attempt to sell them tickets…well, it just pains my heart. I want to call him, let him know it’s OK, I’m probably going to end up renewing my tickets anyway—and that it doesn’t matter if he’s not that great of a salesman because he’s an amazing defenseman who makes a fuck-ton more money than I ever will. Unfortunately, he’s likely on a plane right now making his way to Ottawa for tonight’s exhibition game against the Senators (which you can watch live via streaming video at nhl.com).

To see some clips of Jurcina on the ice during the IIHF World Championships in Moscow, check out this interview. To hear his, uh, sales pitch, go here.

Milan Jurcina: No. 1 in my heart, dead last in sales for September 2007.

Saturday morning I made my way to the Kettler Capitals Iceplex in Ballston to attend the second day of the Washington Capitals’ training camp. The place was packed but, luckily for me, I’m a former season-ticket holder currently undecided on whether or not to re-up my seats—so I was invited to a pre-practice “Coffee With the Caps” get-together in which a group of 10 or so fellow fence-sitters got to chat with General Manager George McPhee (I arrived late, but not too late to get all the juicy details regarding the semi-controversial signing of Michael Nylander—thanks George!), stuff ourselves with breakfast sandwiches and pastries, and watch the day’s events from the comfort of the complex’s second floor balcony while members of the organization’s guest services department tried to woo us back. (Despite sweet grab bags of hats, stickers, and signed pucks—as well as a tour of the office and the promise of an Alexander Ovechkin-signed stick—I have yet to decide on my ticket situation.)

During the drills and following scrimmage, several players stood out, other players looked shaky, and some were completely unnoticeable—which, depending on whether you play offense or defense, is a good or bad thing. But, despite impressive performances during both the rookie and training camps, winger Francois Bouchard and defensemen Karl Alzner and Josh Godfrey were returned to their respective junior league teams on Monday; though all three players demonstrated their high potential, they weren’t likely to beat out any of the more experienced veterans for a place on the roster and aren’t eligible to play in the American Hockey League due to their age. The following day, 19 minor leaguers and AHL-eligible prospects were assigned to the Hershey Bears, leaving forwards Nicklas Backstrom, Chris Bourque, Thomas Fleischmann, Jakub Klepis, Joseph Motzko, Dave Steckel, Kyle Wilson and defensemen Josef Boumedienne, Steve Eminger, John Erskine, Mike Green, Sasha Pokulok, Jamie Pollock, Jeff Schultz, and Tyler Sloan to fight it out for the few remaining spots on the roster.

As far as the forwards go, Steckel and Motzko—the more experienced players on the AHL level—have a harder task of convincing management that they’re more valuable to the Caps in a limited capacity (Steckel is an excellent penalty-killer; Motzko can supply some grit on the fourth line) than they would be in assuming larger roles for the Bears. Fan favorite Bourque, the son of Hall of Fame defensemen Ray Bourque, has some good genes, a strong heart, and a pitbull’s determination in the corners—but the diminutive forward (who is listed at 5'8", 181 lbs) will always face a size disadvantage in the NHL; another season in the AHL developing his already-strong forechecking, skating, and scoring skills (with the occasional NHL call-up) is likely in his future. Backstrom’s a virtual lock to make the team, though where he plays (center or right wing on either the second or fourth lines) has yet to be determined.

Fleischmann and Klepis are perhaps the most interesting story. The long-time pals, who—on various levels during their hockey careers—have often been joined at the hip, once again find themselves in similar situations: Both are restricted free agents who have yet to sign a contract with the Capitals and are fighting for their jobs. Klepis shows occasional flashes of offensive brilliance and was a leading scorer for the Bears during last year’s Calder Cup playoffs, but has been inconsistent in the NHL. Consistency on the NHL level has never been a problem for Fleischmann, but—unfortunately for the slick-passing left winger—that consistency is in his inability to finish a scoring chance. Both have also declared a lack of interest in playing in Europe should they not make the Caps’ roster; in that event, the Caps may make a trade and give them a chance with another NHL organization.

There’s also a handful of Caps veterans whose future with the club is in question. Competing for spots on the third and fourth lines are wingers Matt Bradley, Ben Clymer, Brooks Laich, and Brian Sutherby. Both Clymer and Sutherby followed up career-best seasons in 2005-2006 with lackluster performances in 2006-2007: Sutherby eventually lost his position as the shut-down center on the third line to Boyd Gordon (who is all but certain to continue in that role this season) and responded with an uninspired effort toiling away on the fourth line (which may have been due to a nagging groin injury that has plagued him almost his entire pro career); Clymer, meanwhile, was shifted from forward to defense then back to forward were he struggled before it was announced in March that he had been playing with an abdominal injury since the day before the season opener and had elected to undergo season-ending surgery. (More on Clymer’s status with the Caps in Tarik El-Bashir’s article in today’s Washington Post.) So far this season, Clymer has played with a lot of spirit, scoring a goal and getting into a fight in the first preseason game as well as getting into a near-scrap with Caps defensemen Shaone Morrisonn during practice after the latter objected to being checked by the former. Laich, who elected to go to arbitration in the off-season, can play any forward position; his versatility is a plus, but he’s not particularly effective regardless of where he’s lined up. Bradley’s a hard-hitter and willing to drop the gloves in defense of a teammate, but he loses more fights than he wins and brings little offense to the table.

Should none of the younger players earn a spot on the team, expect Bradley, Clymer, Laich, and Sutherby to remain with the organization—either on the bench or in the press box—when the regular season begins. But if one of the kids (Fleischmann being the most likely) steps it up, a trade will probably be in the works.

Think that’s complicated? Wait until we get to the situation on defense. All of the Caps’ practices and scrimmages are open to the public; should you be interested in attending go here for a FAQ.

The Washington Capitals‘ Rookie Camp concluded yesterday with a 5-3 loss to the Philadelphia Flyers’ rookie team in an exhibition game held in Voorhees, N.J. By all accounts, the more skilled Caps squad out-skated the Flyers but was manhandled physically and had a tough time killing penalties (four of the Flyers goals were on the power play). Which is a bit of a disappointment (especially for those who made the drive to watch the game in person)—one would think that the Caps’ prospects would be ready to compete with players of their own age vying for positions with an organization known for its rough-and-tumble brand of hockey—but, hey, at least center Nicklas Backstrom scored a goal.

The prospects’ performance throughout camp and during the scrimmage, however, seems to have pleased General Manager George McPhee and coach Glen Hanlon: Tarik El-Bashir mentions on his blog on WashingtonPost.com that he was told only four of the rookies—Maxime Lacroix, Brett Leffler, Luke Lynes, and Justin Taylor—of the 30 or so participating in the camp have been cut so far. In previous statements regarding this year’s already crowded training camp (which begins tomorrow morning), McPhee had hinted that only a handful of rookies would actually be invited.

So, either McPhee has a lot of cuts to make this evening, or the rookies already expected to be invited to camp (Backstrom, right wing Francois Bouchard, and defenseman Karl Alzner) will be bringing a bunch of their friends. Of course, Backstrom is pretty much expected to step right in as the team’s second-line center while Alzner is expected to step right back to juniors; Bouchard, on the other hand, could be a dark horse candidate to make the team—especially with highly touted prospect Eric Fehr still suffering from a lingering injury that will keep him from attending training camp and competing for the second-line right-wing position most Caps fans had hoped he would have earned by now.

I’ll be hitting up training camp this weekend and, hopefully, a few more times before the regular season starts, so I’ll let you know who’s there, who’s performing well, and who’s underperforming their way out of a spot with the team.

Tarik El-Bashir of the Washington Post writes in his blog that several Washington Capitals players—including Donald Brashear, John Erskine, Brent Johnson, Olie Kolzig, Boyd Gordon, Nicklas Backstrom, Michael Nylander, Chris Clark, Shaone Morrisonn, and Brian Sutherby—have arrived in D.C. early to get a few informal skating sessions in before training camp begins Sept. 14. Nothing spectacular there, outside of El-Bashir mentioning that Comcast SportsNet’s gravelly-voiced, love-him-or-hate him color commentary analyst Craig Laughlin was leading some of the drills, prompting a few “put the biscuit in the basket,” “dipsie-do,” “kabonged on the coconut,” and other Laughlinism-related jokes from the peanut gallery at WashingtonCaps.com’s message boards.

Then El-Bashir drops the real bomb: Former Cap and fan favorite Peter Bondra is participating in the informal skate session as well. Of course, El-Bashir notes that “Bondra has done this the past few Septembers to stay in shape”—but that disclosure will certainly not be enough to keep the ever-smoldering “Bring Back Bondra!” argument from re-igniting into a four-alarm blaze. The mere mention of #12’s name within any Caps-related context—particularly during the post-draft, pre-training camp summer doldrums of the NHL off-season—inevitably sets off heated message board discussions between those who never got over General Manager George McPhee trading the fleet-footed winger to the Ottawa Senators at the 2003-2004 trading deadline and those who insist Bondra (and/or his agent) played the organization like a bunch of saps before signing with the Atlanta Thrashers the year after the lockout, and that we’d all be better off moving on.

Indeed, the 39-year-old Bondra—who played only 37 games with the Chicago Blackhawks due to injury—could use a wheelchair, and some Caps fans would still call for the organization to sign him to a one-year, incentive-laden contract. The San Jose Sharks’ decision to sign high-profile, well-past-his-prime loudmouth Jeremy Roenick to a one-year contract near the league minimum, which was announced this afternoon, makes a Bondra signing seem that much more plausible—at least, in the eyes of some.

For the record, I’d be happy with inviting Bondra to training camp and see if he still has enough skill, speed, and strength to compete in today’s NHL, at which point a one-year contract may not be entirely out of the question—not that such a situation would ever happen. And I love Craig Laughlin.

The Washington Capitals have announced that the team will conclude its upcoming rookie camp with an exhibition game against a squad of Philadelphia Flyers rookies. The game—which, according to the Caps’ Web site, “is the first in an initial two-year agreement that will bring the contest to Kettler Capitals Iceplex in 2008”—will be held at 12:30 p.m. on Wednesday, Sept. 12, at the Flyers’ practice facility in Voorhees, N.J. That’s not exactly the most convenient time and place for Caps fans who want to see what Nicklas Backstrom, Francois Bouchard, and Karl Alzner can do against the team’s old Patrick Division foes—but they can still thank whoever’s in charge for making the arrangement with the Flyers organization, as opposed to any of the so-called Southeast Division “rivals” the Caps are forced to play eight regular-season games against each season.

Of course, the rookies-only game won’t provide the Flyers’ recently acquired $52-million-dollar pipsqueak-on-skates Daniel Briere with an opportunity to spear anyone in the family jewels, but he’ll have plenty of chances once the regular season starts.

Well, not exactly—but it’s safe to say that detractors of Alexander “the Wild Siberian” Semin will interpret his candid comments in this Russian interview in that manner. (Special thanks to HFBoards.com poster “artilector” for translating and posting the interview.) And, to be fair, Semin’s certainly given Caps fans plenty of cause for concern, what with his refusal to play for the Caps’ then-minor-league affiliate the Portland Pirates during the 2004-2005 lockout and subsequent refusal to return to Washington in the year following the lockout (citing “military obligations” in Russia), the infamous puck-throwing incident last season, getting thrown off the 2007 World Championship Russian National Team for reporting late to camp, his reluctance to speak with the U.S. media due to his reluctance to learn English, his penchant for reckless driving, general puckhoggishish, and—most recently—rumors suggesting that he refused to have a lingering knee injury operated on during the off-season, which may result in him missing part of the Caps’ upcoming training camp.

Yes, Semin’s big thumbs-down on D.C. nightlife, lackluster enthusiasm for the NHL brand of hockey, and comments such as “women are women” (when discussing his mother’s concerns over his dismissal from the Russian National Team) aren’t going to reduce the number of armchair GM’s screaming for the Caps organization to trade the team’s second-best-scorer and potential All-Star. But, as the Peerless Prognosticator astutely noted on the Caps’ message boards, Semin’s answers “[s]eemed pretty simple to me…Washington is where he works, Russia is home. Shoot, I don’t expect to live here when I retire, either.”

OK, so it’s not necessarily a “blasting,” but Ted Leonsis wants to know: “What Has the Washington City Paper Ever Won?” Leonsis’ question is in direct response to a City Desk entry posted last Friday titled “Caps Manage to Win…Something,” in which—outside of a sarcastic title—this level-headed, fair-minded, longtime Caps fan made note of how the organization kicked ass at the Information and Display and Entertainment Association’s 25th annual conference.

One would think that the blog-savvy Vice Chairman of America Online Inc. (and one of the NHL’s more personable owners) would be familiar with the snarky tone blogs often take with the team, which has finished fourth-worst in the league for the last two seasons. Compared to some of the other numerous Caps-related blogs, City Desk is as harmless as the Caps’ power-play. (Seriously, does DCist’s Eli Resnick get this kind of grief?)

Either way, Ted, you could have saved us both some time and logged onto AAN.org (the Association of Alternative Newsweeklies’ Web site) to check out what awards the City Paper has received. But I’ll go ahead and do the dirty work for you. After the jump, a list of all the first-place AAN awards the City Paper has won since you became the owner of the Washington Capitals…

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It’s no Stanley Cup, but Kukla’s Korner reports that the Washington Capitals organization took home three Golden Matrix awards at the Information and Display and Entertainment Association’s 25th annual conference earlier this week.

The Caps’ Game Presentation department took home the association’s Best Music Video award for their Alex Ovechkin as Superman in-game video, as well as the 2007 Best Overall Video Display awards for the subdivision of hockey and the overall contest.

The Best Music Video Award recognizes excellence in pre-produced video segments that have been edited to music and where music is central to the creative impact of the piece. Washington’s Ovechkin as Superman video depicted the team’s superstar as the comic book superhero.

Here’s the video:

No word yet on whether or not each member of the Caps’ Game Presentation department will get one day to spend with the awards.

Of the five players who received qualifying offers last week that were eligible for salary arbitration, two have elected to do so: defenseman Milan Jurcina and forward Brooks Laich.

Jurcina, a 6-foot-4, 233-lb. defenseman acquired in February from the Boston Bruins for a 4th round selection in the 2008 NHL entry draft, made $500K in the 2006-2007 season. That’s a pretty paltry amount for a promising 24-year-old who, playing alongside former Bruins teammate and current Caps defenseman Shaone Morrisonn, immediately became one of the Caps’ steadiest blueliners and is considered one of General Manager George McPhee’s savviest moves in recent years. Considering that even recently-departed journeyman Brian Muir made more money last season, it’s not surprising that Jurcina would look for more than the 10 percent raise that comes with the qualifying offer he received. Hopefully, Jurcina and McPhee will be able to negotiate a deal that keeps the hulking defenseman in Washington for a few more years at a modestly raised salary before the scheduled arbitration hearing hits.

Laich, a 6-foot-2, 208 lb. utility forward, on the other hand, probably should have joined Brian Sutherby, Steve Eminger, and John Erskine in keeping his trap shut and thanking his lucky stars he received a qualifying offer in the first place. It’s not that Laich—who most Caps followers will forever remember as the dude the team received in trade from the Ottawa Senators for fan favorite Peter Bondra–isn’t an energy guy capable of plugging away on the third or fourth lines and notching a few points. It’s just that the Caps already have more role players than they know what to do with, and Laich doesn’t have Boyd Gordon’s shutdown capability, Matt Pettinger’s speed, Sutherby’s leadership qualities, or Donald Brashear’s left hook. And, with the incoming infusion of actual offensive talent (Michael Nylander, Viktor Kozlov, Nicklas Backstrom), Laich isn’t likely to get another shot as a Top 6 forward.