Shaw advisory neighborhood commissioner Al Hajj Mahdi Leroy Joseph Thorpe Jr. may have lost the Nov. 7 election, but he’s not gone yet. At his last meeting as the official leader of ANC 2C, Thorpe and his allies made sure he will remain a force on the commission well after his departure.

Well over an hour into the meeting, Thorpe recognized a grant request from East Central Civic Association, a neighborhood group active within Thorpe’s single-member district. Not mentioned was that the ECCA is now run by Thorpe, who was named the organization’s president on Monday night.

Eloise Wahab, secretary of the ECCA, walked the grant proposal up to Thorpe, who read over the proposal briefly before informing all present that the requested $3,000 was for two laptop computers, accessories, and a digital camera to do a documentary.

Charles Walker, a Shaw resident, asked for the floor. “There’s been an election,” Walker started, “and looking at how the recount result is probably going to go, I think this commission doesn’t have any democratic mandate to be giving out money like this. I think it should be left to the new commission.”

“Thank you,” Thorpe responded, dismissing Walker.

Thorpe won’t be retiring his gavel anytime soon, either. After he resigned as chairperson, the new chair, Barbara Curtis, appointed Thorpe to be parliamentarian, as well as her unpaid executive assistant—marking the first time the ANC has had an executive assistant or a parliamentarian.

As parliamentarian, Thorpe will be responsible for conducting the meetings and maintaining order. In his new post as “executive assistant,” Thorpe’s phone number will remain the official phone number for the ANC.

One resident was confused. “I think you are my representative,” she said to Curtis. “So does that make him my representative?” pointing to Thorpe.

Thorpe, who routinely answers questions for the oft-confused Commissioners Brooks and Curtis, clarified.

“If you want to do any ANC business,” he said, “you’ll be calling [me].”

In a stunning turn in the race for a seat on the Crestwood advisory neighborhood commission, incumbent James H. Jones has reclaimed his commissioner job over upstart Jeff Hildebrand. On Election Night, it appeared that Hildebrand had scored an upset for the ages when he bested the veteran politico, 289–288, on Nov. 7.

But the uncertified tally was just that—it hadn’t included absentee and provisional ballots which were counted on Nov. 17.

Those ballots were enough to return Hildebrand to the political backwoods. Today, with the election results certified, Jones captured the win over Hildebrand by eight votes, 313–305.

Jones marked the occasion by faxing a written statement to Washington City Paper. In his typed missive, he admits that the last few weeks—with narrow defeat looming over his head—had been tough. “In the last few weeks, I received many telephone calls from well wishers lending their support, hopes and prayers,” the statement reads. “One call that I will always treasure is from a cagey octogenarian lady in my community who cited the City Paper’s article that prematurely and falsely reported my defeat. She said, ‘Mr. Jones, don’t worry, keep your chin up. In the end, it will be their defeat, not yours. God will cast the deciding vote.’ He did.”

Twenty-four other Crestwood residents cast absentee and provisional votes for Jones as well. In a subsequent interview, Jones is less humble about his close call. “I thought I was going to win,” he says. “I never figured that it would be this close. We live and learn.”

Jones has not yet received a concession from his opponent. “Protocol says he should reach out to me, and I don’t have any intention of breaking that,” he says. “That sounds so trite. Just say, I just expect a call from him.”

Hildebrand says he’s just happy that he almost won: “It shows I have a base, and it means I can be back out there in 2008.” He will not ask for a recount.

For five consecutive school years, a giant 25-foot-by-5 foot heap of dirt had sat on the playground of Oyster Bilingual Elementary School in Woodley Park. Finally, more than a year after City Paper first covered the story, the pile is gone, replaced with a climbing wall for kids.

The developer who built the school had used dirt mound to disguise a slab of unsightly concrete that was reinforcing the playground area. But the mound became the truly unsightly thing when it lost its grass and deteriorated into a pile of dirt and rocks. When parents first proposed transforming the mound into a climbing wall, according to ANC Commissioner Deborah Jane Lindeman, D.C. Public Schools wouldn’t allow it.

“The powers that be were just stubborn as all get out.” Lindeman says. She says that DCPS argued that the climbing wall and wouldn’t be fair to disabled/handicapped students, even though the parents’ plans also included an ADA-compliant climbable rock. Complaining to School Board Superintendent Clifford Janey didn’t do any good.

When DCPS finally gave the Oyster Community Council permission to finish the climbling wall last year, parents went to the local advisory neighborhood commission for a $17,100 grant to make the improvements.

Lindeman says she doesn’t understand why DCPS was so stubborn in the first place. “They kept claiming that it wasn’t ADA-compliant,” she says. “But neither is a mound of dirt and rocks and exposed concrete.”

Lawrence Guyot, longtime civil-rights activist and community organizer, has served as an advisory neighborhood commissioner for 10 years. He’s decided to run again, and as part of his campaign, has distributed a flier asking residents of Shaw and LeDroit Park to “Re-Elect Commissioner Lawrence Guyot” in a large bold font.

Problem is, Guyot can’t be re-elected except in a more liberal sense of the term: He’s not currently on the commission. Guyot was forced to step down in 2004 after Myla Moss challenged him for his seat and won.

Says Moss: “He’s not to be re-elected. He needs to be elected.”

“I’m not claiming to be an incumbent,” Guyot insists, though the next-to-last bullet point in his flier’s background statement reads: “Incumbent member of ANC 1B; Past Chairperson.”

He chalks the faulty flier up to “dated material” and makes no apologies for the error. “I’m [going to] use it anyway,” he says.

Moss says she doesn’t think that Guyot’s campaign pitch was an error. “He just chose to use that verbiage on purpose. It’s no mistake. That’s Mr. Guyot’s form of campaigning.”

Every political career has to start somewhere. Why not start the easy way—by winning an uncontested race for advisory neighborhood commissioner? The job doesn’t pay and requires the ability to sit through the meetings, but it can be quite a little power trip, if that’s what you’re into.

As of 9 a.m. today, there were still 41 single-member districts that are wide open. No potential candidates have picked up the petition forms needed to get on the November ballot. If you’re not in one of the empty guys, there’s still hope: 164 of the 286 districts have only one candidate running.

Opportunity’s knocking, but there’s not much time to get the door. Twenty-five signatures from within your district must be handed in to the ANC office in the Wilson Building Board of Elections and Ethics office at 441 4th St. NW by 4:59:59, says ANC coordinator Gottlieb Simon. “If you haven’t gotten in, the door will be locked at five.”

An irregular feature chronicling the lowest levels of District government. This installment: Advisory Neighborhood Commission 2C (Shaw) meeting, April 5

VOTE OF THE MONTH

Issue: Installing speed bumps on the 400 block of M Street NW. A representative of the Mount Vernon Square Neighborhood Association spoke in favor of them.

Principled Stand Taken By: Commission Vice Chair/Treasurer Doris L. Brooks, against speed bumps

Rationale for Opposition: “We”—people who live near the 600 block of M Street—“should get speed bumps, too.”

Entreaty Made By: Chairman Mahdi Leroy Joseph Thorpe Jr., who told Brooks, “You know you’re my right hand on this commission…but you’ve got to think about your constituents here.”

The Tally: 3-1, in favor of speed bumps. After some confusion as to whether she was merely abstaining, Brooks clarified that she was in fact dissenting.

Parting Shot: Said Brooks, “We were here before there was a Mount Vernon Square.”

OMINOUS EXCHANGE OF THE MONTH

Thorpe [standing, gesticulating] to commissioner Alex Padro, who was quoted last week in the Washington Blade suggesting Thorpe has a “bias” against gays: “I’m not going to be petty with you. I’m going to wait until the Day of Judgment, and whatever you said about me, you’re going to have to defend yourself before God. I’m not coming after you. So keep talking about me, because I’m going to get your blessings on the Day of Judgment. I’m gonna get ’em.”

Padro [seated, nodding and smiling]: “OK.”

Thorpe: “What goes around comes around, man.…By nature, God—something’s gonna happen.”