Departing why.i.hate.dc blogger Rusty poses with two of his least favorite D.C. institutions—Smith Point and City Paper—in an interview with washingtonian.com. When asked what one thing he'd improve about Washington, a city he's been hating on so much that he considers moving to Columbus, Ohio, a step up, "Eliminating the Washington City Paper once [...]
Will Mitchell: Washington City Paper Web Programmer by day, Internet superstar by night.
Mitchell, forever immortalized on the Express softball "Opening Day" online photo album (shown here absorbing the weight of the Express's Chip Porter), has again become fodder for Internet gossips/tween scrapbooks. Yesterday, the Huffington Post (ever heard of it?) went big on Mitchell with [...]
Record: 0-12 (.000)
Last Saturday, as the City Paper Shadows neared the end of our final media league double-header, the sun shone unforgivingly upon this ragtag group of Staff Writers, Managing Editors, and Account Executives. We had just weathered a relatively tight game against the Washington Post (17-4[!]), and had nearly finished up an even [...]
Record: 0-whatever (.fuckit)
"The art of losing isn't hard to master," Elizabeth Bishop wrote in "One Art," a poem that could double as the Shadows' theme song. "So many things seem filled with the intent to be lost that their loss is no disaster."
So by Bishop's logic, Shadows games are disaster-free zones. AP beats us by [...]
Record: 0-8 (.000)
Last Saturday, not long after helping the City Paper Shadows lose three games in a row, I helped host a small dinner party at my house. Among the guests was an 8-year-old boy. He plays in a baseball league, I play in a softball league. So, we had much to discuss.
"How many home [...]
I don't play on the City Paper softball team.
As outlined in these pages, the squad is hurting for bodies and talent. I have only the former to give, but I'm not going to.
Me and guys I grew up with had a team in Northern Virginia for 23 years. We were never that good, and finally [...]
A memo recovered from the National Press Club's softball team reveals the club's top-secret strategy against the City Paper Shadows in our upcoming face-0ff this Saturday:
We're tied for first place in our division with Team Video and Atlantic Video, and if we can win all three games, we'll be in great shape both divisionwise and [...]
Record: 0-5 (.000)
That record above notwithstanding, every member of the City Paper softball team brings a special talent to the table. Me, I'm very good at filling in the tiny boxes on scorecards. It's something you get a lot of practice doing on the Shadows bench. The opposing team scores a run, I fill in [...]
Those are the first words I think on Saturday mornings, at least the Saturday mornings that the CP Shadows actually play softball. And yes, I mentally italicize them, per house style.
Last year, we got into a groove—show up, get our asses kicked, go for pizza. This year has been more difficult, because the 6-hour [...]
The last few weeks of rain have not only been a boon to the region's drought-stricken agriculture sector. They have been a glorious time to be a member of the City Paper's star-crossed softball team, the Shadows.
Because when we don't play, we don't lose.
"I think that the past two weeks have been nothing but a [...]
Record: 0-4 (.000)
Last night, Matthew Smaldone—who's been doing heroic work for the City Paper Shadows making left field a place where doubles go to die—sent an e-mail to his fellow players. He linked to a Web site called How to Play Slow-Pitch Softball as a Team. The page, Smaldone wrote, had "good advice on hitting, [...]
Record: 0-2 (.000)
Losses! We all have them. But not all losses are created alike, as we learned midway through our game against the Gazette last Saturday. Our team is proud to claim some battle-hardened vets who remember losing in all sorts of ways in 2007. But here's how bad—how heart-crushingly, cover-your-face-with-your-mitt-to-hide-the-tears bad—it got in the [...]
Yesterday, the Metropolitan Media Softball League invited team representatives to answer a series of questions about their squads. I gather that this was done in the hopes of producing some kind of scouting report in advance of the season, which begins Saturday. Do the powers that be at MMSL truly believe we're gonna give up [...]
