*Is this really so shocking? A local resident says she prefers D.C. to her native California. Also, she had her car stolen three times…in California. Slate.com has the video

*Chocolate Chip Cookies! So few ingredients, yet so many ways to mess up. “Like the omelet, which many believe to be the true test of a chef, the humble chocolate chip cookie is the baker’s crucible.” If you’re hungry, open this web link at your own risk.

*Note to Metro Transit Police: you have to report your own incidents, just like you’d report others.

*And in other food news, former Top Chefer Spike Mendelsohn is set to open his burger joint this week and host his famous pals–you know, “Colicchio, Padma Lakshmi, and a bunch of Mendelsohn’s New York buds”–next week, according to Seriouseats.com.

*What to do when your rowhouse doesn’t provide enough lawn space to meet your gardening needs: see photo here.

Metrocurean previews tonight’s big Food Network event for District foodies: Chef Teddy Folkman of Granville Moore’s does serious battle on Throwdown! With Bobby Flay. Flay is kind of a douche—take away his hot peppers and he’s nothing!

Apples and Bananas links to a story about how tofu may cause memory loss late in life. No!

Pop Cesspool discovers that rapper Bushwick Bill has found religion. The Cesspool is awestruck: “Sixteen years later, I still get mileage out of the Bushwick Bill quote, “Why you shot me in the eye? I woulda shot you in the body!” (”Ever So Clear,” 1992.) Such sweet paradox, on so many ridiculous levels. That said, I can’t even imagine what verbiage might be available on his new Jesus piece.” In a kinda related note, Upset the Setup revisits some classic Company Flow.

14th & You notes that the “summer mugging season” has begun. Despite recent events, your chances of getting mugged are still pretty low. More likely: Perps stealing your car. That’s at least in Logan Circle. Now, Adams Morgan is another story.

Congress Heights On the Rise questions what the hell ANC 8C is doing paying more than $10,000 per year in rent (and reports no other expenses). Blogger speculates that the ANC office space also serves as a barber shop. Photos do reveal a possible barber-shop/ANC joint operation.

Your morning wake-up song: “In Ear Park” by Department of Eagles.

*photo by His and Hers Parigi and found on our neighborhood Flickr page.

* Local writer Holly Jones has another Dispatch from the Anacostia, a McSweeney’s column following youth from the Earth Conservation Corps—this time with an appearance by the Columbia Heights Target.

* Prince of Petworth dishes out the July 4th firework advice. (Ugh).

* Reliable Source continues its mission to unmask D.C. art rogue “The Collector.”

* Daily Campello Art News offers up a poll: Choose whether “We Should Have a National Museum Just for Latinos” or if “We Should Have More Latinos In Our Museums.” So far, the second choice has 100% of the vote. At Morning Roundup time, only two votes were in; hat means Campello’s got at least one voter in his camp. Or he refreshed the page.

* In Shaw points us to a new blog, Bohemian Yankee in the Capital: Salty dog author talks history, sports, queer imagery and urban development. Writes IS: “It’s still new so he’s feeling his way around. Jimbo and I have been helping him grasp the concept and purpose of blogging, so when you visit be nice.” IS also drops that the Yankee started the blog in order to promote two books he’s got coming out. Sounds like he’s got the hang of it already.

* Brightest Young Things watches Raquel Welch dance. Badly.

* Slate has got your patriotism blah blah blah blah.

Photo by NCinDC.

*What do you say when a bunch of angry ex-convicts ask you why they don’t have jobs? Why blame DCPS, of course! A group of protesters demanded that more work opportunities be created for people released from prison. That ain’t easy, said D.C. Chamber of Commerce President Barbara Lang: “The school system has failed them. You have to have a certain level of education.” Read the story in the Washington Post.

*Slate.com has created a “Choose Your Own Running Mate” feature. Answer a few quick questions and watch the list be narrowed down.

*Gaudencio Fernandez erected an unusual sign on his property decrying inhumane policies toward illegal immigrants: “We demand equality and justice for all,” Fernandez’s broadside concludes. “We will not be your slaves of the 21st century.” What do you know? Some people would like to see the sign taken down, according to the Washington Post.

*What do beets, canned pumpkin, and sardines have in common? They are some of “The 11 Best Foods You Aren’t Eating” according to the New York Times. Oh and cinnamon is also on the list, which apparently got one commenter a bit worked up: “If cinnamon was that great then Americans would be the healthiest nation on earth. Never have I seen so much overuse of cinnamon in any country before. Its in the toothpaste, the breathmints, the coffee, the desserts, the cereal, the bread, its in EVERYTHING!”

*And in case you were still pondering where to go on July 4, here’s a reminder of where to catch the best views of the fireworks.

Congress Heights On The Rise recently attends East of the River development meeting and comes back with rave reviews: “Perhaps I am biased (this was the first community meeting I attended) but it definitely wont be my last. This meeting set my expectations for community/non profit meetings going forward. Overall, the board members were friendly, insightful and patient in explaining things to a newbie such as myself. They were welcoming and very inviting. In their words “‘no one from the community has ever come in to observe the meeting although it is a public meeting.’” Citizen journalism on the rise!

The Heights Life finds the next underground hotspot: “Leaving the Wonderland early Sunday morning, your bloggers came across a site that I exclaimed as “fantastic” about 50 times in a row. The vacant building next to the Wonderland on 11th Street was transformed into Bloombar, which its website describes as ‘Spontaneous, underground music, art and inspiration.’ The small gallery and performance space is a great fit for the 11th Street corridor, and I can’t wait to see what it becomes.” PoP has an in-depth post on Bloombar as well.

Bloomingdale got stood-up by a cab. A bad night turns into a rant.

BaancBlog reports on the sale of 1212 9th Street: “Hanny Chan, of Old Dominion Brewery, has purchased the 1212 Ninth Street lot from Selp Help, who got it from Walnut Street Development, who got it from Phillip Abraham, who had it for a very long time.”

14th & You wonders Where do you get your drink on? They write:

“Bar Pilar has practically no outdoor seating, and Saint Ex restricts theirs to dinner patrons only. Cork was packed, as per usual, and we weren’t really feeling the “wine bar” vibe anyway.

So, we hoof it over to 17th/18th street, only to find every place either packed or restricting outdoor seating to dinner guests. We ended up having dinner and a couple of drinks at the Straits of Malaya on 18th street (good food, loathesome service, but that’s another post for another time…)

We didn’t head up to U St., because the narrowness of the street tends to preclude much outdoor seating…but there may be a place or two that we’re simply not aware of.”

The District Domestic offers this tip of the day: Rosemary can be used as a medicine.

Your morning wake-up song: “Lagos City” by Asiko Rock Group (thank you Soul Sides).

Must Read.

*photo by rockcreek as found on WCP’s neighborhood Flickr pool.

Clinton and Obama held their first joint appearance last night at the Mayflower hotel. I happened to walk by just after an angry woman had some freakout and took her shirt off.

Yesterday’s other Supreme Court ruling: the court struck down a law that imposed stricter rules super-rich candidates who finance their own political campaigns.

Doug Jemal wants to bring expensive clothes (Anthropologie) and groceries (Balducci’s) to Penn Quarter. Balducci’s will need “some help” to move in, which could come in the form of tax-payer supported bonds to defray the cost of opening. Hmmm.

PoP gets word of door-to-door political scams.

BYT is sending one of their own to try out for the Wizards girls tomorrow. Where’s out entry? Mike Debonis is definitely our best dancer, but he’s on vacation.

The Smithsonian Folklife Festival opened for business yesterday, featuring Texas (?), NASA (??), and the kingdom of Bhutan (whew). I’m interested in learning more about NASA’s “culture,” one built upon “stirring the public imagination.” Also, astronaut diapers.

Human Guinea Pig’s Emily Yoffe submits herself to the life of a day care worker at D.C.’s Gap Community Child Care Center, and learns that babies are manipulative little bundles of joy. Writes Yoffe, “A recent science column in the Wall Street Journal described a study that found that you don’t even have to like kids to have your brain’s fusiform gyrus produce instantaneous good feelings when you see a baby’s face.”

Self-referential Window Covering Of The Day: Prince of Petworth posts this sweet pic of a window obscured by a sign that reads “Do not knock on my window.” I smell dare!

Mr. T in D.C. should really go to the dentist. For now, a freaky dental scene squeezed within Marathon Man’s stolen diamond–Nazi–Dustin Hoffman-as-unfortunate-grad-student plot is T’s excuse for not getting his impacted wisdom tooth removed. My current excuse is “shitty dental insurance.” Besides, can’t have too many teeth, am I right?

New Columbia Heights claims the Heights metro “smelled like cookies” yesterday. Hmm. Are they making cookies out of old backpacks and gasoline now?

Brightest Young Things helps you indulge your zombie-themed nerd fantasies.

All Our Noise celebrates the quinceañera of the Flaming Lips’ “Transmissions from the Satellite Heart”—all grown up!

Tonight at Fort Reno: Zulu Pearls, Dress Up, and The Shakes.

Photo of this totally sweet dude in the Metro by mattlemmon.

*Ticks! Yuck. Slate.com explains to us their terrible ways, and asks the question on everyone’s minds: “Why did god make ticks?” Silly writer! Scientists don’t believe in god. (Actual response: “I don’t have the answer,” Dr. Burgdorfer said. “There are a lot of things we assign to the good Lord and we ask the question, why? All I can advise is to check yourself for ticks and remove them fast.”)

*Recently, there have been several articles about how online writing is changing how we read and take in information. Atlantic Monthly published one. As did Slate.com. But Jack Shafer zeros in on the most unforgettable one.

*You can run, but you can’t hide, D.C. landlords. Mayor Adrian Fenty vows to overhaul the rental building review system.

*In this period of sunburns and bug bites, let’s take a moment to learn about the itch from the New Yorker’s Atul Gawande.

*Yeah, it’s summer. Wish you were doing this right now too?

Bloomingdale reports that the LeDroit Park gate was destroyed by a reckless driver this past Saturday:

“A deranged driver destroyed the new LeDroit Park Iron Gate at the corners of Florida Avenue and 6th & T Streets NW. The Civic Association is working with the city & DDOT to have the repairs made as soon as possible.

At this time, we are asking the community to assist us in locating the iron pieces that have already been removed from the site.

The missing parts include the ‘LeDroit Park’ name, date & scrollwork. Please help us in this search (no questions asked).”

Penn Quarter Living continues its coverage of DDOT moving a loading zone for the cheapo Chinatown buses. The buses are now supposed to load up near L’Enfant Plaza after people complained about the buses’ excessive idling: “So, now DDOT has provided a solution by forcing buses to L’Enfant or else face a $1500 fine. We’re already hearing rumblings about the location of the loading zone far away from where any residents live. But, we don’t know if any particular block in this city was jumping up and down to be designated as a bus depot. Sound off!”

Apples and Bananas reports that a “revised” Dragonfly is set to re-open soon.

Mr. T in DC attends stitch-and-pitch night at Nationals Park last weekend. This theme night is an actual theme night. Mr. T’s verdict: “The seats were quite comfortable, and my back pain didn’t act up the whole time I was there, which is a very good thing. The amount of lumbar support in the seatbacks must have been just right.” Glad to hear it!

The District Domestic sings the praises of “tubtrugs”–giant brightly colored flexible plastic “buckets” that are great for hauling small plants and soil.

Brightest Young Things has some super good pictures from last week’s Orchestra Baobab show.

New Columbia Heights discovered a crowd of religious folk congregating at the metro. They didn’t just clog the sidewalk (that’s loitering!). They sang, clapped hands and passed out cards. Where are the noise police?

The Department of Parks and Recreation is still hoping your kids will sign up for its summer camps.

Your morning wake-up song: “Toomus Meremereh Nor Good” by S.E. Rogers (thank you For the Turnstiles).

*photo courtesy of guy_incognito from our Flickr page.

Artist proposes a happier, less worried rendition of King for memorial statue.

Ellington likely choice for the D.C. quarter.

A really ugly building proposed for 11th and U, and some zoning intrigue to go with it.

Bring on the frozen yogurt. TangySweet and SweetGreen are here, without spaces, and Pinkberry is on the way. Didn’t this happen in the late 80s/ early 90s too?

Weegee is cool.

Some old-fashioned specs-appeal. Via Jezebel.

* The Post catches up with some Viking enthusiasts with a pretty serious RPG. Just don’t dish out pirate slang: “‘Wrong fantasy,’ muttered Viking enthusiast David Tristan” when confronted with an “Avast, ye matey,” the Post reports.

* Prince of Petworth stumbles upon a mailbox that doth protest too much.

* Mr. T in D.C. gets spied on at the gym: “Normally, I’m a strong supporter of photographer’s rights, in our post-9/11 security paranoia. On the other hand, I don’t want any photos of myself posted on upshortsflabbywhiteguyspumpingriron.com .”

* Upset the Setup has a new catchphrase for the Obama campaign, after campaign volunteers at a Detroit rally told two Muslim women not so sit behind the podium to reduce their visibility in photographs and on television: “That’s not change—that’s brand management.”

* m4intern finds possibly the douchiest craigslist missed connections ever:

You: You’re back. You Georgia Belles, you Texas cowgirls, Midwest farmer’s daughters, California girls, spunky New York girls. You’re all back. Back to rescue me from the dark, bleak winter months. After 9 hours at my desk, I walk out and there you all are. Walking around the Hill in your skirts and flip flops. At bars, tossing your hair and smiling at me from across the room.

Me: I’m that 20-something hill staffer. I have waited for this day for nine months. And now, you are back, Beautiful, you are back.

Photo by NCinDC.

* Enough already with the saccharine Russert tributes! says Jack Shafer of Slate.com.

*Onto a proper analysis of his “Meet the Press” replacement, says FishbowlDC. Here are the website’s contenders: David Gregory, Chuck Todd, Chris Matthews, Tom Brokaw, Gwen Ifill, George Stephanopoulos, Brian Williams, and Andrea Mitchell. Is anyone literally placing bets yet?

*Ugh, solid Keith Olbermann profile in the New Yorker. The “ugh” is for my  conflicted, uncomfortable state of mind while reading the piece. Great writing. Abrasive, frightful character.

*It’s summer. It’s about time someone covered the heat from this angle.

*And speaking of the year’s most leisurely period, it’s getting rather late to book your vacation. The Atlantic Monthly has a travel suggestion that might still have some vacancies.

*And while you’re over at that website, be sure to click by Hanna Rosin’s illuminating piece about poverty on the urban fringes.

The Heights Life finds a dude passed out on its front stoop: “On Saturday morning around 7:30 am, I found a guy sleeping on the front stoop of my building. No shirt, no shoes, but cell phone in hand. We had a lovely conversation.” Thankfully conversation jotted down for others to now read.

Penn Quarter Living appears thankful that Platinum has closed. Responses to the post want a more “appropriate” use for the “historic” building. (As one commenter astutely pointed out the Platinum space has been a club forever–or at least since the ’70s). The rest of the reactions went like like this one: “i am not one to go out dancing but i sure am doing a celebration dance right now here in my condo at this news!!!! yeah!!! i have been sleeping better since they closed their doors.”

So yeah, Typical. Look: You bought a condo in Penn Quarter. What did you expect? Ugh. Stop being whiny babies and realize you live downtown. Deal with it or move.

And Now, Anacostia notes that Eleanor Holmes Norton talked about east-of-the-river development. The Colbert Report star talked up Homeland Security moving on to St. E’s campus. Woo. Is this really something to brag about?

Metrocurean has had enough deep fried soft shell crabs: “Almost every soft shell I’ve stuck a fork into this season in a restaurant has been hiding in a cocoon of deep fried coating. Why do so many chefs batter the hell out of the poor, delicate creatures and toss them in a deep fryer?”

Eckington (Way Better Than Spotsylvania) celebrates the closing of the KFC at Florida and North Cap.

Tommy Wells appears to celebrate the death of a public school.

D.C. Foodies writes on making your own potato chips.

Your Morning Wake-Up Song: “Fuck A Perm” by The Coup (thank you Moistworks).

Police have ended the checkpoint in Trinidad. This a day after they said they would extend the checkpoint through Sunday, and a few days after they said the checkpoint would shut down on Wednesday. Chief Lanier has called the exercise a success: there was no violent crime in Trinidad while the checkpoint was up. The rest of the city was another story.

Metro is a mess again.

Maybe the Japanese are onto something: government-mandated waistline measurements. Only problem is the Times doesn’t say what the limit is for women.

Christians believe in aliens.

The Supreme Court believes they have the right to habeas corpus.

Did they play D&D in ancient Rome?

* The checkpoint continues, says the Examiner: Lanier has extended the Trinidad checkpoint from Wednesday to Sunday.

* Oooooh, buuuusted: textbooks at a private school in Fairfax County operated by the Saudi government have been found to “contain material promoting violence and intolerance.” When the books were made available to the U.S. Commission on International Religious Freedom for inspection, “there were indications of revisions—cutting and pasting of passages, and words whited out,” but some questionable passages remained, the commission said:

Particularly alarming passages were discovered in a 12th-grade Tafsir (Koranic interpretation) textbook and a 12th-grade Tawhid (monotheism) textbook, both of which clearly exhort the reader to violence, the commission said … Several passages in other textbooks promote intolerance toward members of the Ahmadi, Baha’i and Jewish faiths, as well as Shi’a Islam, according to the commission. [the Examiner]

* Prince of Petworth continues its series of interviews with area home renovators. This interview, with Stacey and Dan, is conducted by e-mail “due to scheduling conflicts (I kept getting too drunk and sleeping too late over the weekends),”writes the Prince. Photo extra: Big pile of rocks!

* McSweeney’s contributer Ken Saji imagines If A Unicorn Were On the National Security Council:

The unicorn presents a briefing memo written in watercolored rebuses. It’s 630 pages long. The unicorn states that it’s no small feat writing out “operational malfeasance” in pictures, and the president says, “Well, ain’t that the truth.”

* The Washington Post said “nipples.”

Photo of the scene outside hillary Clinton’s concession speech by adamsofen