Author Archive
Post Office No. 10: Northwest Station, 20015
Northwest Station, 20015
The last installment of a 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 5632 Connecticut Avenue NW
Date: 4/21/09
Time: 2:59 p.m.
O, Chevy Chase! Crown jewel of Upper Northwest! Are your post offices as well-kept as your traffic circles, as exclusive as your country clubs, and as decadent as those safety flags people once used to cross Connecticut Avenue?
Post Office No. 9: Kalorama Station, 20009
Dog Waits in Vain, 20009
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 2300 18th St. NW
Date: 4/20/09
Time: 4:47 p.m.
18th Street is renowned for its loose women, looser men, well drinks, jumbo slices, and fine imported goods. But D.C.'s answer to Bourbon and Beale Sts. also has a post office! Is Kalorama Station as good at the porno-and-head shops amongst which it is nestled?
Post Office No. 8: Arlington Station, 22201
[NO PHOTO OF ARLINGTON STATION 22201 IS AVAILABLE, AS YOUR CORRESPONDENT'S CAMERA RAN OUT OF BATTERIES AT A PARTICULARLY INOPPORTUNE MOMENT. BUT, IN LIEU OF A PHOTO, IMAGINE A STATELY, GOLD-TOPPED, CLASSICAL BUILDING - A BUILDING NOT UNLIKE THE U.S. SUPREME COURT, THE U.S. CAPITOL DOME, OR THE WHITE HOUSE. INDEED, IMAGINE A RESPLENDENT BUILDING THAT COULD APPROPRIATELY HOUSE THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES, HIS BEAUTIFUL WIFE AND CHILDREN, AND HIS PUREBRED PORTUGUESE WATER DOG. NOW, UN-IMAGINE THAT PRESIDENT, FIRST FAMILY, AND FIRST DOG, AND REPLACE THEM (IN YOUR IMAGINATION) WITH A NUMBER OF BUSTLING POSTAL WORKERS IN BLUE UNIFORMS MERRILY BUSTING THEIR HUMPS BENEATH A GOLDEN EAGLE (YES, AN EAGLE SOMEHOW CRAFTED FROM SHINING GOLD, OR AT LEAST GOLD-PLATED) TO DELIVER YOUR MAIL ON TIME. GOT IT? THAT'S ARLINGTON STATION. THERE'S ALSO A PHOTO HERE.]
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 3118 Washington Boulevard
Date: 4/17/09
Time: 1:03 p.m.
While my USPS expertise does not necessarily extend to jurisdictions beyond Washington, D.C., I do occasionally like to sample the customer service at P.O.'s outside Chocolate City to see what, if anything, I'm missing. I employ an analogy to bolster my argument: how could one claim to be a food critic if one only ate and reviewed Chinese food?
Post Office No. 7: Curseen-Morris Mail Processing and Distribution Center
Curseen-Morris, 20066
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 900 Brentwood Rd. N.E..
Date: 4/15/09
Time: 11:43 a.m.
If you live in D.C. and you receive mail, you've gotta love Curseen-Morris 20066, D.C.'s enormous postal distribution center. Formerly known as Brentwood Postal Facility, C-M2K66 is hallowed ground: In October 2001, USPS employees Joseph Curseen, Jr. and Thomas Morris, Jr. died from anthrax exposure helping a copy of Card Player (a poker magazine to which I subscribed in the early aughts) get to my home in Mt. Pleasant (sorry, guys, and thanks for the sacrifice). But does this USPS Golgotha do right by the honored dead for which it is named by carrying on a long tradition of high-quality customer service?
Read More "Post Office No. 7: Curseen-Morris Mail Processing and Distribution Center" »
Post Office No. 6: Southeast Station, 20003
Southeast Station, 20003
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 600 Pennsylvania Ave SE
Date: 4/15/09
Time: 11:16 a.m.
Though I'd never visited Southeast Station before today, a trusted confidante informed in an email in re: "A Particularly Painful Post Office" that this "Post Office [sic] on Pennsylvania by Eastern Market really, really sucks balls." What USPS reviewer wouldn't want to investigate this testicular claim?
Post Office No. 5: Martin Luther King Jr., 20043
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 1400 L St. NW
Date: 4/16/09
Time: 12:00 p.m.
Full disclosure: 20043 and I have a long, troubled history. When I worked a few doors down from MLK in the early 'oughts---before MP3s, MySpace, etc.---I spent many frustrating lunch hours waiting in often-prodigious lines to mail promotional CDs around the world. This left me time to practice anger-management techniques and fill out USPS customer comment cards (since discontinued) bemoaning MLK's poor service (which eventually earned me a five-minute consultation with a USPS supervisor and a free book of stamps). How has the past decade treated my former postal nemesis?
Read More "Post Office No. 5: Martin Luther King Jr., 20043" »
Post Office No. 4: LeDroit Station, 20001
LeDroit Station
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 416 Florida Ave. NW
Date: 4/8/09
Time: 3:35 p.m.
On the bleak polygon formed by the intersection of S Street NW and Florida, Rhode Island, and New Jersey Avenues lies LeDroit Station, as lonely a post office as one could imagine. King of its own curious, concrete island, 20001 stands alone at the center of a vortex of constant traffic and auto exhaust. What P.O. lies in this foreboding USPS no-man's land, and does it have customs forms?
Post Office No. 3: Friendship Station, 20016
Friendship Station, 20016
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 4005 Wisconsin Avenue NW
Date: 4/8/09
Time: 4:30 p.m.
Up the street from the Obama-worthy Sidwell Friends School and troubled mortgage lender Fannie Mae, Friendship Station is the P.O. of choice for some of the most powerful names in American politics. But is 20016 doin' right by Sasha and Malia?
1. Automated Postal Center (APC)
Oh, glorious APC! Your convenient visage shines through a USPS-sponsored darkness! Ne'er will I deal with a disgruntled clerk within 20016's hallowed walls!
2. Safety Glass
Hell, no! What do you think this is, a liquor store on Georgia Avenue?
Read More "Post Office No. 3: Friendship Station, 20016" »
Post Office No. 2: Brookland Station, 20017
Brookland Station, 20017
A 10-part series in which Justin Moyer, part-time musician, part-time journalist, and full-time USPS enthusiast visits a bunch of post offices in our nation's capital so you don't have to.
Location: 3401 12th St. NE
Date: April 7
Time: 1:07 p.m.
"My band rehearses at this delightful practice space in Brookland."
"Brooklyn?"
"No---Brookland. In Washington, D.C."
So runneth the typical exchange with a high-powered music executive who somehow can't understand that all bands aren't from New York's most overpriced borough. But what Brookland, 20017, lacks in national name recognition, it makes up in desolate railroad tracks, warehouses-turned-art spaces, and a cozy post office conveniently located near Yes! Natural Foods. But how cozy is too cozy?
Post Office No. 1: Cleveland Park, 20008
Cleveland Park, 20008
Location: 3430 Connecticut Avenue NW
Date: April 7
Time: 4:28 p.m.
Cleveland Park is an errand-running mother lode. A trip to trusty old P.O. 20008 offers a good chance visit its notable neighbors: Yes! Natural Foods, Magruder's, Petco, CVS, Supercuts, and the Uptown movie theater, where I saw the entire Lord of the Rings trilogy. But does the quality of the post office itself justify a sojourn west across Rock Creek Park into yuppie Mordor?
10 Post Offices: An Introduction
As a touring musician and owner of a small record label, I have not found fame and fortune, but I have spent a lot of time at the post office. Demo tapes, CDs, album masters, album art, press packets, promo posters, money orders from the road, gear sold on EBay—trust me, I've mailed a lot of shit. As a result, I know exactly what I want—and, from hours spent in some of the worst post offices in our fair District and, I expect, our nation, exactly what I DON'T want—from the blue-clad public servants I pay to handle my correspondence. And, as anyone who's been to this post office knows, all post offices are not created equal.
Over the next two weeks, I will review ten U.S. Post Offices in the Washington Metropolitan Area from my hit list and my shit list. I will rank them and assign letter grades based on consideration of the following seven criteria:
Read More "10 Post Offices: An Introduction" »
Three Minutes with Dick and Jane Heller
Dick A. Heller (pictured here with his wife Jane) is the plaintiff in District of Columbia v. Heller, the landmark gun case recently adjudicated before the United States Supreme Court. As Justice Antonin Scalia explained in his majority opinion striking down the District's handgun ban, "the District's ban on handgun possession in the home violates the Second Amendment, as does its prohibition against rendering any lawful firearm in the home operable for the purpose of immediate self-defense."
When I arrived at the Supreme Court to photograph Mr. Heller, I was unable to locate him as 1) the Supreme Court is a large building, 2) I did not know what Mr. Heller looked like, and 3) I had left my cell phone at home. I contemplated borrowing a tourist's cell phone, but deemed the necessary preamble - "Excuse me, you don't know me, but I'm a newspaper reporter for the Washington City Paper...well, really, more of a videographer...but I'm searching for Dick A. Heller, the plaintiff in District of Columbia v. Heller, a landmark gun case, perhaps you've heard of it? Anyway, I am supposed to contact Mr. Heller, but I forgot my cell phone...can I use yours?" - too complex. Also, most tourists on hand were praying as part of a pro-life protest, and I doubted they would be in the mood for lending out PDAs to unshaven strangers. After short discussion with a security guard, I was directed to one of the Highest Court's two payphones, and was able to locate Mr. Heller the old-fashioned way.
Three Minutes with Nizam Ali
Nizam Ali is the son of Ben and Virginia Ali, who founded Ben's Chili Bowl at 1213 U St. NW in 1958. The elder Alis are now retired - Nizam runs the Washington landmark with his brother Kamal (not pictured).
When I first contacted Nizam, I suggested meeting at noon to film his portrait. Nizam was concerned that our session would interrupt the Chili Bowl's busy lunch hour. I reconsidered my initial suggestion and offered an 11:30 meet. Nizam readily agreed to this. However, when I arrived at Ben's Chili Bowl, I found the lunch counter a-bustle with hungry Washingtonians clamoring for food. Though swamped with customers, Nizam graciously sat for three minutes outside, where the bright sun allowed me to film with few in-camera metering modifications.
Three Minutes with Eleanor Holmes Norton
Eleanor Holmes Norton has represented the District of Columbia in the United States Congress since 1991. Former chair of the Equal Opportunity Employment Commission and professor at Georgetown University Law School, Ms. Norton is a third-generation Washingtonian and longtime voting-rights advocate.
When planning this portrait, I decided to shoot Congresswoman Norton's profile - an angle which I thought communicated the understated dignity of her unique position as a legislator without a vote in the U.S. House of Representatives. However, she quickly nixed this idea.
"No woman wants to be filmed from the side," the Congresswoman said.
Three Minutes With Andy Shallal
Andy Shallal is a restauranteur, antiwar activist, and artist. He opened Busboys & Poets, a cafe whose name pays tribute to the poetry of Langston Hughes, on the U Street Corridor in 2005.
When I arrived at Busboys & Poets to film Mr. Shallal, I learned that he was running a few minutes late and decided to kill some time in the cafe's bookstore. When Mr. Shallal arrived, he caught me reading Bill Cosby's controversial "wake-up" to the black community Come on People: On the Path from Victims to Victors. Embarrassed to be caught reading Mr. Cosby's embarrassing book, I tried to reshelve it, but could not find the section from whence it came. Mr. Shallal was gracious about the mix-up.
"Don't worry," Mr. Shallal said. "Just leave it on the counter."
