Author Archive for Joe Eaton

Cop Fires Shot in Columbia Heights

A bullet failed to stop the driver of a stolen car this afternoon in Columbia Heights, according to authorities. A Park Police officer fired a shot at around 3:20 p.m., after pulling over the driver of a green 1997 Honda Accord with Virginia plates at the intersection of Park Street Road NW and Hiatt Place [...]

In Search of Story, Pack Goes Craigslist

Call it virtual shoeleather. For local reporters, it seems craigslist.org, the coffin nail of newspaper classified sections, is fertile ground for finding sources. In a May 26 post, Washington Post staff writer Ernesto Londoño asks the bike-riding folk of D.C. for their rip-off tales to help with a bike-theft story he's working on:
I recently joined [...]

Glass Eye Will Get You Discount MARC Fare

Want to ride the MARC train for cheap? Here's how you do it, according to Raymond, who got on at the New Carrollton stop Tuesday night, bragging about his $3 ticket: You go to your doctor, have him write up a letter, get yourself a disability card.
Raymond, who is 38, looks pretty fit. I ask [...]

Bullets Over Baltimore

It's better in Baltimore. You've heard it. Well, before you move out of your absurdly priced D.C. apartment and join the commuters from the "real city" next door, let me tell you what it's really like.
Sure, you get an apartment with a full-sized refrigerator for under $1,000, but there's hell to pay. First off, there [...]

One Lucky Pedestrian

Shortly before 8:45 this morning, Susana Ricca walked out of the Jurys Hotel in Dupont Circle in search of a bagel. She didn't make it to Firehook Bakery, less than a block away.
Just as she made it to the sidewalk across Q Street, Ricca heard a loud crunching bang to her left and caught the [...]

Cab Rides a Buck More

The D.C. Taxicab Commission today raised the price of a cab ride $1 per trip to offset increases in gasoline prices.
A dollar more a trip? I think I can make it to a Metro stop.

From the Annals of Supreme Bad Taste

"V-Tech Massacre," the video game.
Of course it was only a matter of time before the Virginia Tech massacre became fodder for some sick fuck. In the game, the player gets to spree like Seung-Hui Cho, the shooter who killed 32 people before killing himself. In the background plays one of Cho's favorite songs, "Shine" by [...]

School Protesters Inflitrate Council Chamber

Outside the John A. Wilson Building this morning, a group of mothers from Alice Deal Junior High School in Tenleytown stood on the sidewalk waving signs and yelling, "Abuse is real at Deal," and "Fire the racist bully principal."
The principal in question, Melissa Kim, is known to students and parents as a strict disciplinarian. The [...]

Can’t Buy Me Love

"That must come with a ball tickler." That's what my older brother used to quip when confronted with an inordinately expensive commodity. In the case of Deborah Jeane Palfrey's $300-an-hour escorts, the answer to that question seems likely to have been, yes, if that's what turned you on. On Thursday, a judge ruled the "D.C. [...]

The Quick-and-Dirty Background Check

Before a recent U-Haul move from Virginia to Maryland, I noticed a Craigslist add for moving help. My wife and I own a hefty couch and way too many boxes of books to lug up three flights of stairs. I responded. A guy named Kenny e-mailed back asking $15 an hour.
Seemed fair. It was set.
A [...]

Lanier Gets Emotional At Swearing-In

If never let them see you cry is the female executive's bulletproof vest, police Chief Cathy Lanier went in bare at her teary swearing-in ceremony at the Tivoli Theatre this afternoon.
And who could blame her, what with the dim lights, the woman fingering a syrupy version of "Waiting on the World to Change" on the [...]

Jack LaLanne Thinks You’re Fat and Weak

Late Thursday morning, a codger in a dark pinstriped suit stood on Freedom Plaza striking body builder poses as bureaucrats and the odd politician jumped in and out of the picture frame.
If you think that's funny, here's what the old man thinks about you young people: "I think they are a bunch of fat guys," [...]