For walkers, this week was bad luck
While crossing the street, two were struck
Sure, fate is capricious
But why not delicious?
Heck yes, I'd get hit by this truck

It sure seems that Metro's bemoaning
The change that had riders all groaning
With kiosks outmoded
Make fares auto-loaded
Not yet, though, 'cause Catoe's postponing

I'm sad to see Cephas depart
For with him, that man takes my heart
He's clearly an ass
But lovably crass
In my book, bad taste is an art

When casting your vote in the booth
Just think of Graham's bowtie (so couth!)
Whatever you ponder
Don't let your mind wander
To thoughts of cabs, bribes, or that youth

As poet, I feel obligated
To highlight things classic (or dated?)
And yet, here's my screed:
Screw biking in tweed
That whole thing seemed way overrated...

With twenty-ten practic'ly here
The bag fee grows ever more near
DC D.O.E.
Wants you and wants me
To know what we'll owe the cashier

The phrase "skip the bag, save the river"
Makes resource economists quiver
With each passing nickle
Cash money will trickle
Who knows what the fee will deliver

The paper for guys who like guys
Has shockingly met its demise
Goodbye to the Blade
But don't be dismayed
A similar rag may arise...

We hear that the writers conspire
(They're surely too young to retire)
They're thinking of names
For out of the flames
A phoenix is born from the fire

The man whom we all have critiqued
Was in the news twice when it leaked
I'm sorry 'bout mama
But live tee-vee drama?
My int'rest could not be more piqued

The ante is upped on the feud
'Bout loopholes the bill should include
The bishops are wary
That if gays can marry
They'll have to comply or be sued

Unclear if he quit or got sacked
But Wepman now has his bags packed
The count under Rhee
Has risen to three
Can anyone work there intact?

The lane is now open for biking
But not quite to everyone's liking
To bike contraflow
Is causing some woe
And street markings...well...they are striking

So speaking of gear-heads and grease
Hizzoner says now he will cease
In future, while training
The man is refraining
From hauling 'round District police

'Bout weather, I'm loath to complain
But dammit I hate all this rain
A state of emergency
(Ida's insurgency)
Just was declared by Tim Kaine

And now for my best silver lining:
No need for more weather scheme whining
The WaPo's restoring
Its layout (still pouring)
Good news for all those who were pining

This month as the Council is aging
'Round town many parties are raging
Got mayoral hopes?
Then get off the ropes
With donors, you'd best start engaging

Your birthday means more than a bash
It's also a chance to raise cash
The constituent fund
Is best when fecund
Get in there and add to your stash!

Today we introduce Hannah Neprash of districtlimerick.com, who will write regularly on D.C. news and politics—in limerick form.

Election week left some aghast
From last year, the difference was vast
A bell-weather? nope
Creigh Deeds had no hope
Before the first ballot was cast

The hearing for marriage rights raged
The witnesses—they got engaged
To make Council swoon
Could be a real boon
Who cares if it felt a bit staged

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