In case you missed it: BeerInTheBathroomsGate™!

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All day yesterday, Dan Snyder’s radio station, WTEM-AM, was pushing an event called “ESPN-980 Night of Quarterbacks: Three Quarterbacks. Three Generations.” That’s a dinner produced by Snyder’s sportstalker that is, at least for now, scheduled for Nov. 3 at Union Jack’s in Ballston. The featured guests, according to the radio and web advertisements, are Sonny Jurgensen, Joe Theismann, and Jason Campbell.

Quite a haters triangle there, eh?

(AFTER THE JUMP: How many people showed up at FedEx yesterday? The waiting list guy’s now estimating Redskins crowds? Vinny Cerrato looks like Balloon Boy’s dad? Even Barno bails on the Redskins? Jim Zorn mines for a silver lining?A lot more about Led Zeppelin at the Capital Centre?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Is Now a Good Time for Snyder to Promote ‘Night of Quarterbacks’?” »

Great Moments In Capitalism (Cont.)

I thought Dan Snyder couldn’t top himself after selling Sept. 11 Commemorative Hats for profit.

Note to self: Never overestimate Dan Snyder. Never. Ever ever. Never never.

Folks at FedExField for yesterday’s game reported that Snyder’s vendors were selling beer to fans IN THE RESTROOMS!

And this isn’t the first time.

(After the jump: New evidence of Snyder’s “revenue stream”?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Breaking News: Fans Say Redskins Selling Beer in FedExField Bathrooms!” »

Hate to stomp on the weather beat that others at City Desk are already covering with gusto. But I’ll stick to forecasts, and stay away from the retrocasting favored by the boss.

So, Sunday in Landover at kickoff: 47 degrees, rainy, winds 13 miles an hour from the north and 100 percent cloud cover. That used to be called “Redskins Weather!” around here. Now, it’s called “You Can Get a Redskins Ticket for 17 Cents Weather!”

On a related note…

Redskins Ticket Watch: More than a thousand ads for Skins/Chiefs tickets on Craigslist this morning. Asking prices in just the first few listings I found went from “Way below face value!” to “Half Price!” to “75 percent off!” to “Make an offer!”

Face value’s a pipe dream. Come to think of it, with 47 degrees and wet on the horizon, 17 cents might look like a windfall by kickoff. In any case, folks who intend to show up at FedExField might need to bring something to cover their heads from all the precipitation.

Like, bags or plates, maybe?

(AFTER THE JUMP: Vinny Cerrato is told it’s the talent, stupid? Snyderatto = Rosie Ruiz? Snyder changed the copy in the cheerleader car wash contest AGAIN? Will the Great Dan Steinberg fall for the not-actual-cheerleaders picture bait AGAIN? Ronnie Mervis and Dan Snyder use the same advertising firm?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Remember When This Was Called ‘Redskins Weather’?” »

David Alprin had his anti-Dan Snyder artwork, or whatever you want to call the above paper plate thingee, confiscated at the gates of FedExField two weeks ago.

Alprin’s a longtime Skins season ticketholder and was one of many fans who wanted to make a statement about the state of the franchise.

He’d stayed up late the night before the Tampa Bay game crafting dozens and dozens of his statement-makers. But then Snyder’s jack-booted thugs, in the form of the yellow-jacketed FedExField security staff, threw Alprin’s civil-disobedient plates in the garbage before letting him in the stadium.

But while Snyder killed the message, he didn’t kill the messenger. And Alprin’s going back for more of the same this weekend.

“I’m thinking about going stealth and bringing in pens, markers, etc.,  and making signs in the stadium either on paper we bring or the back of the drink caddies,” he says.

He won’t be alone.

More on the Prague Spring of Redskins fans to come.

***

(AFTER THE JUMP: Another installment of BogusHogetteGate? Really? Michelle Rhee thinks she’s god? Really? Coat-tailing on Mike DeBonis’ genius? Really? Melanie Oudin’s coming to town with her mom, dad AND coach? Really? Snyder comes out on top in something? No way! Way?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Will Prague Spring for Redskins Fans Survive Snyder’s Jack-Booted Thugs?” »

I’m now hearing from more old Hogettes about Stephette Hogette, a fellow cross-dressing Skins fanatic who has been accused of being — big gulp! — a bogus Hogette.

These Hogettes aren’t happy about the photo that Cheap Seats Daily ran earlier this week, which was supplied by Stephette, real name Steve Rasnikov (though he also goes by a rap name, Snow Rap G, as well as a witness-protection name, Carmine Fischetti, which Stephette came up with to ward off vigilantes and the Hogette Police).

The shot above shows Stephette with other Hogettes (he’s in the middle). Stephette says the photo was taken years ago at a Redskins game, and claims that it proves that the other Hogettes accepted him before they went “so corporate” and started hanging out with other sponsored mascot types, including Bird Man of the rival Philadelphia Eagles.

But other Hogettes say the photo means nothing, and that Stephette, who has been wearing his pig snout since at least 1992, when the NY Times wrote about his Skins fanaticism, has acted disgracefully with the ladies during Redskins tailgate parties, and that he has no real affiliation with their gang.

After seeing the shot, Joevette Hogette, behind the snout to the left in the above photo, emailed Cheap Seats Daily to downplay its significance:

“THAT PIX WAS TAKEN ON THE FLY,” wrote Joevette Hogette, described as the oldest of the Original Hogettes. “[Stephette] CAME UP BEHIND PORKCHOP AND ME AND HIS BUDDY SNAPPED THE PIC……NOTICE HOW BLURRED AND OUT OF FOCUS IT IS…..DEFINITELY NOT A POSED SHOT.”

And Howard Churchill, another longtimer who goes by Howiette Hogette (or, rather, Howiette Hogette®, as he apparently prefers), also threw his pooh-pooh at the photo:

Read More “BogusHogetteGate® Update: Real Hogettes® Blast Stephette Hogette’s Photo Evidence!” »

Above is an ad e-mailed out by the Redskins ticket office this week. As you read this, remember, for chuckles, that just a couple months ago Redskins executive Mitch Gershman was claiming in press releases that the team had a waiting list of “over 200,000.”

Sure, the Skins waiting list has long been bogus. But this year it’s also become apparent that the NFL’s blackout rule is enforced as stringently as its steroids policy.

(AFTER THE BREAK: Where’s Chris Cooley in that photo? Clinton Tortoise? Lord Farquaad? Lindsay Czarniak cheers on teams that don’t pay her? Is the NY Times reporter on Dan Snyder’s payroll, too? Another Have-Nots bowl this week?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Are Snyder’s Redskins Worth Only 17 Cents a Share Now, Too?” »

I heard again last night from Stephette Hogette. He’s the guy who stands accused of being a bogus Hogette.

He sent along a photograph, shown above, which he says was taken years ago at a Redskins game and, he says, proves that Stephette Hogette used to be accepted by the same folks who are now calling him a counterfeit.

While Stephette Hogette’s disheveled drag ensemble—he’s the one in the middle—does indeed blend with the garb of the folks he’s with in that photo, he couldn’t name the other Hogettes he’s hanging with in the shot.

Perhaps they’re unsanctioned Hogettes also! I don’t know which Hogette to trust anymore!

(AFTER THE JUMP:Where will the real Hogettes be tailgating come Sunday? WTEM tones down its Redskins Cheerleader pride giveaway? D’Anthony Batiste ain’t worth a D’amn? D’Anthony D’Ances with D’An D’Aly? Nobody told the Washington Post that “Remember the Titans” was a load of crap?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Stephette Hogette, the Bogus Hogette, Now Fears Real Hogettes!” »

Author’s note: The Redskins lost. The rest of today’s Cheap Seats Daily will be devoted to what is at once the bizarrest and the most pathetic episode to come out of this sorry season.

Be scared,  people: A fake Hogette is on the loose.

As if things weren’t bad enough in Redskins Land, a dire APB went out to hardcore fans over the weekend: The man calling himself “Stephette Hogette” is not a real Hogette.

Sure, the guy’s rubber snout and his ladies garb, to the untrained eye, make Stephette Hogette look exactly like the authentic Hogettes, who’ve been dressing in drag since 1983 but won’t give up their gimmick all these years after it outlived its cuteness. But don’t be fooled: Not just anybody can align themselves with these douchebags.

(AFTER THE JUMP: The bogus Hogette is “dangerous to women and possibly children”? Cheap Seats Daily tracks down the fugitive Hogette? The fugitive Hogette says “This means war!”? The fugitive Hogette also raps? We need Hogettes, bogus or not, now more than ever?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily Exclusive: Bogus Hogette Declares War on Real Hogettes!” »

Allison Vivas once thought she’d be spending Wednesday night in D.C. with Newt Gingrich. Then he stood her up.

Instead of getting mad, Vivas got even. So just as the Scandinavians were doling out the Nobel Peace Prize to President Obama, Gingrich was being named “Porn Fan of the Year.”

Politics played a role in both awards.

Read More “The Newt Pornographer Strikes Back: Gingrich Named Porn Fan of the Year by Scorned Dinner Date” »

Another day, another update on Dan Snyder’s Cheerleader Car Wash Sweepstakes. Another chance to run that fab/yucky photo from Snyder’s WTEM promotion, the one that’s sucked in some of the most brilliant minds in new media to our humble comments section.

Seems Snyder doesn’t really care who he jumps in bed with these days. His partner in the contest, which forces Redskins cheerleaders to put down their pom poms and pick up sponges and go service his radio station’s 25-54 year old male demo, was a sponge company called SpongeTech Delivery Systems, Inc.

Well, just as the cheerleader pride giveaway was heating up, Snyder’s ally gets nailed for all sorts of alleged shadiness by federal regulators: The Securities and Exchange Commission suspended trading on SpongeTech stock this week because of sketchy reports and non-filings of required documents.

(AFTER THE JUMP: SpongeTech’s the Six Flags of the sudsy set? SpongeTech’s so messed up it makes Snyder look like a fab businessman? Are Redskins cheerleaders being punished? Is WJFK punishing WTEM in the ratings? Can Mike Wise punish Tony Kornheiser? Is Anacostia/Eastern the Good Counsel/DeMatha of crumminess?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Could Car Wash Contest Be Snyder Punishing Redskins Cheerleaders for Promoting Rival WJFK?” »

Sheila Johnson has jumped in some hot water that she can’t swim out of.

The Washington Mystics have been rotten throughout Johnson’s run as team president, having finished in the bottom half of the WNBA’s Eastern Conference all five seasons under her, and not winning even a single playoff game.

But Johnson has gotten a pretty free ride through all the on-court suckitude. She’s hailed by the gay community for not pretending the grandstands ain’t laden with lesbians, and, not coincidentally, she brought the Mystics back to the top of the league in attendance.

Perhaps the lack of criticism in the face of such lousiness let Johnson feel empowered to mock Creigh Deeds, the Democratic Party gubernatorial candidate in Virginia, as a stutterer during a fundraising appearance for Republican opponent Bob McDonnell. But she’s finding out she’s not bulletproof after all.

Read More “The Mystics President and Her Mock-aca Video” »

Cheap Seats Daily and its inferiority complex ravaged sister publication remain the go-to news organs for coverage of what the Redskins have officially dubbed the Cheerleader Car Wash Sweepstakes.

Yesterday, in this very space, we blew the lid off the latest listener contest for Dan Snyder’s sportstalk station, WTEM-AM, in which the Redskins owner promises to send his cheerleading squad over to winners’ houses and make them wash cars.

And in this week’s analog edition, we blow the lid off Dan Snyder’s cheerleader past, from his 2000 rackumentary “Beauty on the Beach,” all the way up to his latest scheme, which tells the cheering crew to put down their pom poms and pick up sponges and service his 25-54 male audience.

And, as promised, throughout all this lid-blowing we’ve run the same photograph of all those sudsy blondes, again and again and again.

That’s the shot that got The Great Dan Steinberg so lathered up he rudely barged into the comments section to pooh-pooh our Snyder/T&A expose. TGDS basically accused Cheap Seats Daily of hypocrisy and of being as exploitative as Dan Snyder!

Just because we ran this photo of sudsy blondes!

That hurts.

What kind of message does that contest (and this photo) send to the Little Ladies of Football? Think of the children, Dan and Dan!

(AFTER THE JUMP: Could Snyder’s layoffs at Redskins Park have helped this car wash debacle along? Is it Sherm or Sherman? Dan Steinberg reveals Lewis’ bingo past? Dan Steinberg conceals reveals his own bingo past? How loaded is the Skins’ 2009 schedule with Snyder humiliatees? Yankee Stadium ain’t the only ballpark in use this October? Nationals Park gets loaded with readers?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Will Sherm Lewis Fail? Or Will Sherman Lewis Fail?” »

“How would you like to see the Redskins take on the Cowboys? — AND have the Washington Redskins Cheerleaders soap up and scrub down your car???”

Well? How would you like that?

Check out that ad!

It appears on the Web site for WTEM, Dan Snyder’s sports talk station, to promote the latest listener contest. Top prize will bring the Redskins cheerleaders over to wash your car.

Kinda yucky?

The radio ads are just as outrageous, with panting males and all sorts of breathy talk of scrubbing and rubbing. The campaign is also just the latest evidence of Snyder’s thing for cheerleaders. He took over the Washington Redskins Cheerleaders shortly after buying the team, and has increased their role in his global marketing scheme ever since.

The car wash campaign marks a new level of subservience for the Redskins Cheerleaders, and cheerleaders in general. The message is: “Put down your pom poms and grab a sponge!” That tells the world that Snyder can force his troupe to put on something skimpy and service Joe Sixpack.

Basically, Snyder’s pushing a Madonna/Whore image for his cheerleaders.

Well, minus the Madonna.

(AFTER THE JUMP: More on the Redskins cheerleaders? Snyder is being called “Lord Farquaad”? PhotoGate update: Snyder really did censor Dan Steinberg? Isn’t the Leonsis worship getting outta hand? Guaranteed Win Night proves AGAIN that it’s a sure thing? Remember “The Sure Thing”?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: How Bad Is Dan Snyder Pimping the Redskins Cheerleaders?” »

Out: Book Burning

In: Bag Banning

The Great Dan Steinberg™’s write-up of the ill-will in the grandstands had great photos of the ill-willed.

Well, Steinberg’s Bog post had great photos when it was originally posted, anyway.

As several commenters pointed out, those photos of folks with anti-Snyder t-shirts and paperwork are now gone. Just vanished.

Who removed them? Why were they removed?

Steinberg wouldn’t tell me what happened. Questions were directed to his bosses at the Post’s sports section.

Uh oh.

The mind races. Everybody knows by now that the Washington Post ain’t one of Dan Snyder’s favorite organs.

But would Snyder really try to censor photos of the same bags that he tried to censor for Sunday’s game? I mean, Snyder’s pulled some stuff before, for sure, but if he’s behind Steinberg’s photo removal, that would have to rank among the Skins owner’s most Douchewellian™ moves of all time.

I’ve got messages into the Washington Post’s* sports editors and the Redskins. Stay tuned to Cheap Seats Daily for continued coverage of PhotoGate™!

(AFTER THE JUMP: More tales of anti-bagging from FedExField? “Agent Zero” is the focus of WJFK’s ad campaign? Is “Agent Zero” the most penetrating nickname in Washington sports history? And it came from a City Paper guy? Guaranteed Win Night™ and R²D²™ in the same post? Should I really bet the mortgage and then some on the Twins?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: Would Dan Snyder Censor Dan Steinberg’s Photos of Censored Bags?” »

Dan Snyder’s detestability rating enjoyed another spike yesterday: Reports out of FedExField for the Tampa Bay game have Snyder confiscating paper bags at the entrance to his stadium, so fans couldn’t put them on their heads for the TV cameras.

Sportstalk radio station WJFK this morning put on callers who said they got bags past the gate but anybody who tried wearing one got swarmed by stadium security.

Paper bags! That’s where that Sept. 11 fee Snyder tacks on to your ticket price goes? Sheeesh.

The bag gimmick is old, but funny. The ban is just creepy.

***

Death knell for Jason Campbell: Sonny Jurgensen has seen enough.

Unlike other members of the Skins broadcast crew, Jurgensen never talks without thinking about what he’s going to say. And after Campbell’s second interception, Jurgensen, who along with being the color commentator is a pal of Dan Snyder, said he’d seen enough. “I think it’s time to warm up #16 guys,” Sonny said.

(AFTER THE BREAK: Vinny and Larry get the Great Steinographer treatment? Vinny’s going to bring Sally Jenkins on his radio show? Vinny’s going to send Sally Jenkins his Super Bowl ring? Vinny’s got a Super Bowl ring? Dan Snyder won’t tell you how much your Johnny Rockets burger is? The Redskins schedule only winless teams? Brett Haber thinks the Redskins are sleeping giants? Biggest high school football game of all-time this week? Worst high school football season of all-time is imminent?)

Read More “Cheap Seats Daily: The Johnny Rockets Menu Proves Dan Snyder Is Priceless?” »