Every Tuesday and Thursday, we run down what's going on in local Internet discussion groups.

tenleytown
A civil, open-ended discussion on Wisconsin Avenue NW development quickly devolved into a Friendship Heights residence-longevity pissing match. We break down the numbers so you don't have to:

• “I've lived in Friendship Heights for 20 years (i.e., since 1986)” —David P. Frankel
• “let me state for the record that I am a second generation Washingtonian, a graduate of DC public schools for all 12 years…have lived in DC all my life except for college and grad school and have lived in the ‘hood since 1996, so I am not an interloper.” —Tom Hier
• “I've lived in Friendship Heights for just five years. Therefore, I will shut up and not comment on the development issue for the next 15 years…[I] am just a piece of developer-loving trash. Thank you for enlightening me. JR Ewing over and out until 2021.” —JR Ewing

DupontCircleParents
Nothing stirs the bile within Dupont parents quite like a debate over playground rights. When word came down that the hoop courts and slides at Ross Elementary may no longer be open to “non-Ross” parents, a poster noted that a number of possibly exiled parents had actually donated funds to have the playground built. Chimed in Noreen O'Connor: “I am always surprised at how quickly this lovely little playground turns into an imagined battleground when it is discussed on the Dupont Circle Parents list…. I'm sure no one seriously means to dig up dedication bricks.” O'Connor mentioned the Ross activism of Gloria Borland, who posted, “Maureen [sic], can you please not bring me into this…I am not send[ing] my child to Ross and she has yet to use the Ross playground.” Responded O'Connor: “I assumed that you had some more interest in this. I wish you great luck in the future and hope never to discuss Ross with you again.”

MPD-4D
Petworth anti-crime crusader Joseph Martin has some helpful advice for both police officers and citizens looking to combat a recent spate of shootings in the neighborhood. He asks cops to “consider driving more slowly if you're just passing through the neighborhood.” A “slower cruise” and a “casual glance at street activity” can go a long way. As for residents, Martin says their efforts should come in the form of outreach. Consider “developing a rapport with the guys who make you nervous,” he suggests. “Some of them might need jobs or job-training.”

An irregular feature chronicling the lowest levels of District government. This installment: Advisory Neighborhood Commission 2C (Shaw) meeting, April 5

VOTE OF THE MONTH

Issue: Installing speed bumps on the 400 block of M Street NW. A representative of the Mount Vernon Square Neighborhood Association spoke in favor of them.

Principled Stand Taken By: Commission Vice Chair/Treasurer Doris L. Brooks, against speed bumps

Rationale for Opposition: “We”—people who live near the 600 block of M Street—“should get speed bumps, too.”

Entreaty Made By: Chairman Mahdi Leroy Joseph Thorpe Jr., who told Brooks, “You know you're my right hand on this commission…but you've got to think about your constituents here.”

The Tally: 3-1, in favor of speed bumps. After some confusion as to whether she was merely abstaining, Brooks clarified that she was in fact dissenting.

Parting Shot: Said Brooks, “We were here before there was a Mount Vernon Square.”

OMINOUS EXCHANGE OF THE MONTH

Thorpe [standing, gesticulating] to commissioner Alex Padro, who was quoted last week in the Washington Blade suggesting Thorpe has a “bias” against gays: “I'm not going to be petty with you. I'm going to wait until the Day of Judgment, and whatever you said about me, you're going to have to defend yourself before God. I'm not coming after you. So keep talking about me, because I'm going to get your blessings on the Day of Judgment. I'm gonna get ’em.”

Padro [seated, nodding and smiling]: “OK.”

Thorpe: “What goes around comes around, man.…By nature, God—something's gonna happen.”