Via TheWashCycle, the news (to me; the story’s been out for over a month, ouch) that D.C. has for the first time in many years slipped off the list that the lock company Kryptonite keeps of the Top 10 cities with the most bike thefts.

I’ve got no idea how rigorously the data are parsed over at Kryptonite, but its blog post on the subject expresses surprise that Philadelphia rocketed to the top, displacing New York City for the top spot it’s held for the past nine years. “When we did the compilation, there wasn’t even a city close to Philly. Not even close,” says Kryptonite’s Donna T.

It’s even weirder that we’re not on there because, Nationals Park aside, bike-rack availability is lousy here. And empirically, pretty much everyone I know here has had at least one bike stolen. But hey, a win’s a win.

Kryptonite also offers largely common-sense set of bike-locking tips.

Photo by Rockers generation

1. Downie Talks About Departure by Erik Wemple

2. (I Got a) Pentecostal Block by Amanda Hess

3. Confronting Frank Winstead by Jason Cherkis

4. Layoffs at MacFarlane: Death Knell for D.C. Soccer Stadium? by Mike DeBonis

5. Gas Attack by Ruth Samuelson

6. The Decline and Fall of Theme Park Rock by Dave McKenna (2007!)

7. The Prince Has Spoken by Ted Scheinman

8. Beltway Motorcycle Crash—Your Take? by Erik Wemple

9. Fenty Consolidates Control Over Youth Nonprofit by Mike DeBonis

10. Scooters for a Larcenist by William Atwood Mitchell

Photo of Palace of Wonders’ second anniversary party by goldmember

Outside the Nissan Pavilion at Saturday’s Dave Matthews Band show

1. Von Drehle In Running for Top Post Post by Erik Wemple

2. Update: SIX Flagging by Dave McKenna

3. The Tim Russert Memorial Klingle Valley Recreational Trail? by Mike DeBonis

4. Panda-monium! by Ruth Samuelson

5. The LL Capital Pride Review Stand by Mike DeBonis

6. Poll Results: Dan Snyder Goes Both Ways by Dave McKenna

7. Nouveau Riche Moves On Up by Amanda Hess

8. Russert Wake by Amanda Hess

9. Frank Winstead Gone Wild: The Recordings by Amanda Hess

10. Take Your Dog To Work Day: Fail by Amanda Hess

Photo by Flickr user goldmember

Matthew Yglesias is all over MyBikeLane, the D.C. iteration of a site that lets cyclists post pictures of vehicles parked in bike lanes. Even though I suspect this is a grand forum for people outraged by vehicles parked in bike lanes to report vehicles parked in bike lanes to other people outraged by vehicles parked in bike lanes, there’s always the chance that public shaming will discourage this dastardly practice.

But over at DCist, a number of commenters have complained that cyclists are whiny and need to get off their high horses. I think there’s something to that; many cyclists want to have it both ways, freely disregarding traffic signals when it suits them, pulling in front of drivers without warning and terrifying pedestrians. Just the other day I was pedaling up 17th Street NW and saw a guy riding south in the northbound side of the street. He nearly hit me, then weaved through cars around me before heading over to the side of the street he should have been on all along.

Of course, he was not wearing a helmet.

There’s a lot of enthusiasm online for making D.C. a more bike-friendly place. May I humbly suggest as an advocate of that position—and someone who’s had to break rules to not get killed by oblivious drivers—that cyclists can lead by example here? Keep up the pressure on bike-lane scofflaws. And don’t be one yourself, if you can possibly avoid it.

Photo by tvol

Via the increasingly indispensible Streetsblog, this story about how Philadelphia is planning to paint optical illusions on streets around town to slow down drivers. They’re cheaper than speedbumps, apparently, and they have the added benefit of scaring the bejesus out of drivers who suddenly see three triangles floating in front of them. Why stop with triangles? Imagine how effective trompe l’oeil dragons, or maybe a realistic portal to hell would be?

If you own a fruit stand in Philadelphia or are engaged in the business of moving large panes of glass across the street, this may be cause for concern.

I use the D.C. bike map a lot—I especially appreciate its ratings of streets’ respective suitability for riding. (E.g.: 14th Street NW north of Thomas Circle is splendid; south much, much less so. But wow, is Ride the City’s route tool for New York City awesome. Put in your starting and ending points, and it’ll calculate the safest route, a safe route, or the quickest route. Just thinking out loud (or as I like to call it, “blogging”) here, but what would it take to get something like this fired up for this area?

(Helmet tip: TheWashCycle)

1. Is It Possible to Get Pregnant From a Towel? by Arin Greenwood

2. City Paper Hotel, Drawings Circulating by Ruth Samuelson

3. Campaign Finance Shocker! Schwartz GOP Foe Raises $50K in Two Week by Mike DeBonis

4. Jersey Girl Dodges Date Rape by Angela Valdez

5. The Tim Russert Memorial Klingle Valley Recreational Trail? by Mike DeBonis

6. Waiting Until The Third Date by Arin Greenwood

7. My Fave Part of the R.E.M. Show Last Night by Andrew Beaujon (Black Plastic Bag)

8. Metro Does It Again by William Philpot IV

9. Scenes from Trinidad Checkpoint - Lawsuit Approaching? by Angela Valdez

10. July 26-27: A DMV Hip-Hop Winning Weekend by PJ Urquilla (Black Plastic Bag)

Photo by gregor_y

Should we be concerned that the new readers are found in a place called “Surburbia“? Or just say “Damn the torpedos” and hire back a staff writer?

1. Uncle Brutha’s Closing by Angela Valdez

2. Weekend Would-Be Jumper on the Ellington Bridge by Jule Banville

3. Washington City Paper’s Dave Jamieson Wins Livingston Award by Jason Cherkis

4. New Capitals Jersey Leak? by Matthew Borlik*

5. Culture of Fear in D.C. by Angela Valdez

6. Spike: What’s Wrong? by Jason Cherkis

7. The Takeover Continues… by Dave McKenna

8. Watch Your Stepp! by Amanda Hess

9. Ducks in Farragut North and Explanation for Same by Arin Greenwood

10. Insane Scooter Jacking Update by Angela Valdez

*Yup, it’s nearly a year old, and it placed fourth. Sigh.

Photo by Mike Licht, NotionsCapital.com

I was at the Udvar-Hazy Center yesterday when I realized the peril of insult inflation. You know, how someone who a decade ago would be merely an asshole is now automatically a douchebag. Because when you see the real thing up close, words fail.

SO, walking into the Space Hanger, I am behind a young couple. She is in denim cutoffs and a white shirt; he is dressed in long shorts, a green T-shirt with Kevin Garnett’s name and number on the back, and a baseball hat.

They pass one of the many Lucite donation boxes in the museum, you know the ones that imply that museums are partnerships between us the museumgoers and the institutions themselves. They stop. Why, somebody’s donation is protruding ever so slightly from the slot! At first I think he’s just trying to push it down so he can make his own donation, but no: He’s fishing it out. And sticking it in his pocket. And then his girlfriend is rubbing his back and saying, “Yay!” and he’s grinning like all his Christmases just came at once.

Douchebag may be worth less than the dollar, but I’m thinking maggot still works in this case.

Photo by roboppy

Amanda Hesser is taking a buyout from the New York Times, which I’ve gotta imagine is going to totally screw up Amanda Hess‘ false positives on phone messages.

Coming off Jamieson’s big win yesterday, City Paper Editor Erik Wemple is in Philadelphia (ohhhh, that’s why there were, like, two blog posts all day yesterday), talking about the grim state of the alt-weekly industry with representatives of whatever alt-weeklies can still afford to send people to conventions. Philadelphia Weekly’s Tim Whitaker writes an editor’s note about the Association of Alternative Newsweeklies convention today, quoting Wemple, the Chicago Reader’s Alison True, and the Voice’s Tony Ortega. All had trenchant, depressing things to say. But then there was this, the best quote in the piece:

“It helps that we’re in the same city as The Baltimore Sun,” says Lee Gardner, editor of Baltimore City Paper. “When we get down, we look at those miserable poor bastards.”

1. Insane Scooter Jacking Update by Angela Valdez

2. The Great Clem Florio, RIP by Dave McKenna

3. I Failed The Player Quiz by Amanda Hess

4. A Memorial Day Tradition by Arthur Delaney

5. National Cathedral’s Greenhouse Closing Shop by Jule Banville

6. One Reason Why the MLK Library Sucks. OK, Maybe Three. by Jule Banville

7. Things I Learned From Seeing Indiana Jones by Jason Cherkis

8. I spent 25 minutes trying to find an appropriate caption… by Darrow Montgomery

9. Who’s Better: GPS or DeBonis? by Andrew Beaujon*

10. CVS Wants Me To Get Pregnant by Angela Valdez

Photo by dornfeld

*Woo-hoo!

TheWashCycle puzzles over the Web site of a bike-rental business recently feted in The Washingtonian. Besides the usual services, the company says it also “provides confidential services to those in high-visibility professions” and that hotel concierges “suggest Better Bikes for their guests needing confidentiality.” WashCycle sagely notes that this sounds like an escort service. I dunno, though: considering the fashion Guernica that results whenever cyclists congregate, such as at the recent Bike to Work Day gathering (above), maybe a little discretion is what this sport needs.

Photo by Wayan Vota