City Desk

The Needle: Drugs Are For Nazis Edition

Arbeit Macht High: Probably just about every day, some dopey American college student visiting Amsterdam stumbles into the Anne Frank House tripping their face off on mushrooms, only to discover that nothing harshes a buzz like genocide. (Years ago, this happened to some friends of ours, and if they're reading, we hope they're still ashamed.) A few Stafford County, Va., high school students on a field trip to the District learned the very same lesson yesterday, as two were taken to the hospital with a drug overdose while visiting the National Holocaust Museum. What would possess someone to get high before visiting the Holocaust Museum is hard to imagine, but remember: Just say no to drugs. And Nazis. -1

School's Out: Every kid has had the dream—they're on vacation, only to learn that their school has burned down and they never have to go back! It very nearly happened today for students at the Takoma Educational Center in Ward 4; a three-alarm fire seriously damaged the school, which was, fortunately, mostly empty, winter vacation having started earlier this week. And sorry, kiddos: You will probably go to some alternate location next month when you return to classes. -2

So Fresh, So Clean: Cross off yet another reason for your snooty New Yorker friends to look down on the District—online grocery delivery service FreshDirect is planning to expand to D.C. soon, challenging Giant's PeaPod service. The e-tailer is looking to raise $200 million to start operations here (most of which it will probably make back within a few weeks of delivering organic grass-fed brisket). Yeah, yeah, we know, the subway still runs all night and Metro doesn't. +3

Peace Out, Feds: Every national elected official from members of Congress to President Obama is clearing out of town, leaving just us locals around for the holidays—with a full 1/6 of the U.S. House skipping out on the final votes of the busy lame-duck session today. We don't want to stir up too much trouble, but it would be an opportune moment for Almost Mayor Vince Gray to stage a coup d'etat and occupy the White House as Obama heads to Hawaii. ¡Hasta la victoria siempre, D.C.! Let's seize those voting rights while we can! Or at least put the "taxation without representation" license plates on the presidential limo. +2

Yesterday's Needle rating: 57 Today's score: +2 Today's Needle rating: 59

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  • Ytzen Lont

    May I point out that selling, buying or using hallucinating mushrooms is prohibited in the Netherlands, also if you don't plan to visit the Anna Frank House.

  • Rick Mangus

    Dumb Ass Kids!

  • noodlez

    YO MAD MIKE HAVE YOU EVER BEEN TO THE HOLOCAUST MUSEUM? THATS SOME DEPRESSING SHIT. LET ALONE THE RIDE FROM STAFF COUNTY PROBABLY ON A CHEESE BUS.

    I WOULD BE ALL AMPED UP ON SOMETHING TOO.

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