City Desk

Cheap Seats Daily: Asian Tiger?

AT&T National Trophy Replica

Let's get right to the issue of the day. The winners of the first three AT&T National events at Congressional:

2007 — KJ Choi

2008 — Anthony Kim

2009 — Tiger Woods

The liberal media doesn't want you to know: There's an Asian bias to Tiger's tournament!

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Woods exploited this bias to beat a field that included upstart white guys Hunter Mahan and Bruce Boudreau. (What? The Capitals coach wasn't in the AT&T National? I coulda sworn I read 10 stories about him playing Congressional, saw some video even. My bad.)

AFTER THE JUMP: Another Nats fireworks snafu? Why do tennis players carry their own sweaty shit? Is Manny Acta the new Norv Turner?

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To assist in filling digital inches, let's continue pretending it's not Post-Racial America! I spent much of my Fourth of July weekend watching two Asian Americans in the final pairing of a golf tournament in DC and two grown up black kids from Compton win another Wimbledon doubles crown, after battling each other for another singles crown.

These ain't your father's country club sports!

One of many things I love love about tennis over golf. Will MacKenzie, the dude who finished last in the AT&T National and missed the cut by 14 strokes, had somebody carrying his bags all day on the golf course. But yesterday I saw Roger Federer, just crowned the Best Player of All Time with his 15th Grand Slam win, stuffing his own sweaty shit into a bag. And Andy Roddick, seeming tragic even though he just played a match for the ages, not having time to mope or rest his bones, because he had to stuff his own sweaty shit into a bag. The Williams sisters? Yup, a day earlier they stuffed their own sweaty shit into bags and carried 'em.

In tennis, no matter who you are, or what you've been through, you stuff your own sweaty shit into a bag and carry it!

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How good was Wimbledon to DC tennis? Let's look: Serena Williams won the women's final. She's the assigned star player of the Washington Kastles, the World Team Tennis squad that starts its 2009 season this week. Serena beat sister Venus Williams in the final. Venus is the assigned visiting female star for the Philadelphia Freedoms, and is (as of NOW, anyway) supposed to face the Kastles here tomorrow night. John McEnroe announced all the Wimbledon matches and got scads of face time. He's the featured male visiting player for the Kastles this season, and will be in the lineup when the New York Sportimes come here on July 16. Andy Roddick is the one big name that always comes to the Legg Mason, with this year's tourney beginning August 1 at Carter Barron. Hope his hip flexor, which he might have hurt while stuffing his own sweaty shit into a bag and carrying it, is better by then.

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With two outs and the Braves having the tying run at the plate, batter  Chipper Jones took a low outside pitch. But the Nationals Park fireworks operator, probably a new guy — pushed the hot button on what he thought would be a game-ending called third strike. It was a ball. The game wasn't over. Jones stepped out of the batters box and laughed as the smoke cleared.

Then Jones walked. A hard grounder to first base later, and the game, and the button-pusher's job, was saved.

Enough with the fireworks, Nationals. They don't add a damn thing to a day at the stadium. But let Charlie Slowes keep his home run and victory call: "Bang Zoom go the fireworks!" I love that.

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Speaking of saving jobs: A guy on Nats postgame show on WFED 1500-AM after Friday's 9-8 loss to Atlanta nailed the team's coaching situation pretty good: "Manny Acta is the new Norv Turner."

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Story tips? Wanna Play the Feud? Tube amps for sale? Send to: cheapseats@washingtoncitypaper.com.

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Comments

  1. #1

    Asian Bias, ROTFL!! What about MLB, NFL, NHL, & NBA's Anti-DC bias for their championship games. LOL!

  2. #2

    just like this!!

  3. #3

    That’s Too nice, when it comes in india hope it can make a Rocking place for youngster.. hope that come true.

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